Order now and get a free red mouth ball!

Cathy ZielskeCZ Life48 Comments

I delete 99 percent of the tacky junk mail that lands in my inbox, but there is always that odd one percent that causes me to take note, usually when it says something like, "Fill out this survey and a brand new iPhone will be yours!" or "Wish you had those perky boobs of yesterday?"

Or this one, which addresses a concern that is near and dear to me, because unfortunately, I sleep next to a "loud breather."

But the more I looked at it, I became increasingly more suspicious as to the REAL purpose behind My Snoring Solution. Something about the head gear apparatus was a little too country-boys-in-the-basement in that one train wreck of a scene in Pulp Fiction. You remember…when Bruce Willis' character decided to be a good egg afterall and save Ving Rhames'… ahem, butt.

So there's the first issue I'm having.

And the second is the shot on the left, which leads you in a totally different direction, suggesting that the other way to stem the problem of snoring is apparently as simple as growing an Amish beard.

It's a fine line between fetish gear and churning your own butter. That's all I'm saying.

Cathy ZielskeOrder now and get a free red mouth ball!

48 Comments on “Order now and get a free red mouth ball!”

  1. #2
    Jan C.

    Ooohhh–wouldn’t that be a sexy little number for your hubby to have to wear to bed. Reminds me of the gizmo my dentist made me to help me stop grinding my teeth at night. Made me feel like a real siren every night as I slid under the covers!

  2. #3

    ooooooooooooooooooooooo,thats just a little too close to ‘squeal piggy squeal’. I can alomost hear the banjo in the background.Din-ninnow-now-now-now-now-now-nown
    I love reading your blog,guaranteed to bring a smile to my face
    Thanks Cathy

    Bridget in Blighty

  3. #5

    Too funny–my kids are gonna miss their school bus. I’m so busy laughing that I can’t get myself together and take them out front.

  4. #6

    Might be a dumb question, but the ad does not expain what the red mouth ball is? Too funny. And ONLY $60…

  5. #8

    Oh my goodness, I can’t believe the price on that thing. I’m just curious about the people who would actually buy it.

  6. #9

    my favorite part is the verbage “90 day no questions asked return policy.” just a little on the scary side.

    on the other hand, it COULD make an intersting part of my Halloween costume.

  7. #14

    hahaaha I have not laughed this hard in such a long time! I was skiming through it thinking oh interesting that is a different “style” of scrapping for Cathy….then I actually read ad had to read the whole blog and was wetting my pants…who could sleep next to someone wearing that thing? LOL! either get scared or pee in your pants! hahaha thanks so much for the funnies

  8. #18

    I saw the graphic before I read your words and I swear my very first thought was that looks a little too much like something the Gimp would be wearing. LOL

  9. #19

    me too – with robyn above – literally my first thought was, “whoa – bring out the gimp!”

    but i laughed out my lunch at the fine line between fetish gear and butter churning – i love how you make me laugh

  10. #20

    Dude, I just laughed so hard. Thank you so much. I desperately needed that today. Why am I now picturing Dan with said Amish beard???? He and Liam could be twins. “Fire In The Belly” indeed.

  11. #21
    Ronni H

    Honestly, what freaks me out most, is how that cat is sleeping with it’s paw all funky. Perhaps I haven’t had enough coffee yet today, but that cat’s paw looks a little, uh, suggestive? ‘Specially if you look at it with your head tilted. What cat do you know that sleeps like that??

  12. #22

    OMG… this post made me laugh so hard. My husband snores, and there is no way that I could ever get any sleep lying next to him in that contraption. I would be way to busy laughing my butt off every night. Then again, maybe I should get one, my abs could use the exercise 🙂

  13. #23
    Monica Brown

    Not only is that the oddest ad I’ve ever seen, but your comments had me laughing out loud! Thanks for sharing!

  14. #25

    I cant figure out which pic is creepier—Snoring Amish man to the left, or strangled by her chin dead chick on the right. 😛

  15. #26

    you get some awesome mail
    all I ever get is porn spam
    I love the layout of you & Aiden. It rocks.

  16. #28

    You are too freaking funny ! I live in PA and often see Amish in my daily comings and goings, so this totally had me belly laughing ! Thanks Cathy, you rawk !!
    Wheres the survey for the Iphone ?

  17. #29

    Well, I’m thinking a jock strap might serve the purpose too. Only the cup would hang out over the chin. A lot cheaper though, since most of us have jock strap on hand, right?

  18. #31

    I’m with you sister…when I first looked at it I thought, “how’d they get a picture of an amish guy in bed?”…Ha!

    And Pulp Fiction…two of my favorite lines in the movie…”it’s not a bike, it’s a chopper” and “Zed’s dead baby. Zed’s dead”.

  19. #32
    Laura Reaux

    LOL! I kept looking at that picture at first, too… trying NOT to see it as an Amish-y beard. I cracked up when I read that you thought the same thing.

  20. #33

    Cathy you had me LMAO this morning when I read this post. Your quit wit just makes my day. Thanks for the laughs!!!

  21. #40

    Kinda reminds me of that thing the blonde secretary on Ally McBeal dreamt up…it was a chin bra or something…too funny.

  22. #41

    Oh, Dear God… I pray this prayer of THANKS that I was not reading anything when I read the last sentence of Cathy’s blog entry today. HA HA HA

  23. #42

    …d’oh!!… I meant that I wasn’t DRINKING anything. Not that I shouldn’t have been. Or that I don’t sound like I’ve been. *hee hee*

  24. #43

    Okay, two “Dude!” moments!

    1) I totally thought ‘Amish beard’ at first too.
    2) If you have sleep apnea, don’t do anything except what the doctor tells you! Because, oh, y’know, you might DIE and all.

    PS I love Sarah’s comment about a chin bra! We say the same thing about those front bumper covers you can get for your car!

  25. #44

    Oh Cathy, Cathy, Cathy! I’ve been missing my daily giggle cos I’ve been offline, but the Amish thing… well, that provoked a full-blown guffaw. Only you could find the words to describe that weird contraption. Thank you!

  26. #46
    Karen E

    Cathty this is the first comment and man i laughed so hard, My husband said that I snored so bad that it might just work, I told him that I would not wear anything like that and would never pay that price, it is easier for him to wake me up and say turn over,,,,,,,,,,,,, My husband I am sure will be telling his hunting buddies about this device,

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