The options are limitless

Cathy ZielskeCZ Life136 Comments

After spending a bit of time letting the news of Simple Scrapbooks’ demise sink in, which definitely included an ample deposit of tears on my pillow, I emerge this week anew. One of my blog readers quoted a lovely line to me, from Minnesota’s own Semisonic, and the song, “Closing Time”: “Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.”

And so I did a little brainstorming. What IS next for Cathy Zielske (aside from a sharp increase in third-person writing?) Funny you should ask.

Nanny for Ali Edwards


Why this could work: I’m exceptionally good at cleaning things, cooking and driving. Simon already likes me, and I know this because we’ve video chatted before. I also know scrapbooking and while I’m bouncing Baby E, I could look over Ali's shoulder and offer up helpful comments such as: “Hmmm. Not sure if that really goes there,” or, “Wow! A lot of people wouldn’t do it that way,” or, “You are my hero,”  or, “Will you link me on your blog?” Plus, I love Oregon and have been looking for reasons to get back out to the Pacific Northwest anyway. This timing couldn’t be better! (Ali, if you are reading, I would also make an exceptional doula. The time draws nigh. Call me!)

Cashier at Target
Why this could work: I am VERY friendly, even for a classic introvert. I know how to use a cash register, and I look really good in red. Just ask my mother. I have MANY years experience in retail sales, including having worked at the Rollerfair Skate Deck Snack Bar and Chess King, all before the age of 18. As a testament to my skill level, I once convinced a customer at Chess King that yes, the knock-off, Michael Jackson Thriller jacket DID look that good on him. Plus, having the Target discount would be sah-weeeeeet.

Contestant on Rock of Love Bus Tour 2

2-rock of love

Why this could work: I AM IN HIS CORRECT AGE BRACKET! I also know all the words to “Highway to Hell.” And I think it would do him a nice bit of good to see what a set of REAL 42-year-old breasts look like for a change. If anything, it would make him more thankful for what he has.

Contestant on Survivor
Why this could work: This would be kind of heavy on the outdoor stuff, right? Hmmm. I’m going to nix this one. Sure, it’d be GREAT for weight loss, but I’m not sure if going insane from bug bites, heat and being forced to stand on large totem poles in a bikini would do a whole lot for my self-image. And let’s be honest here: I’d be voted off the first week. I can almost hear it now: GAWD, if she talks about how she wrote two books on scrapbooking one more time, and how she USED to have this killer job, and how she was thin before she quit smoking I am going to vote MYSELF off!”

Contestant on Making the Band 14
Why this could work: As Dan likes to say, “They STILL haven’t made the band?” Um, they haven’t met me yet. Yo, Diddy, call me! Hey… there’s ANOTHER idea:

Contestant on I Want to Work for Diddy
Why this could work: After he saw my commitment to making the band, I’d be a shoe-in.

Apprentice to Cesar Milan


Why this could work: I may not have a dog of my own, but since getting digital cable, I watch The Dog Whisperer RELIGIOUSLY. I know how to be calm-assertive, and make the “chhh” sound. If Cesar would just give me a shot, I would not only help dog owners learn to be better pack leaders, but I would also give them fantastic tips on how to make mini albums celebrating their dogs’ everyday successes. I would say things like, “Um, that’s not REALLY a strong visual triangle on the page. You need THREE paw print stickers to make it work.”

I guess the point of this blog post is to say I am fully aware I have options. One of those things that is not an option, but an absolute, is keeping this blog alive and humming. So no worries there! Heck, maybe now I’ll spend more time on proper sentence structure. You know what they say—dream big!

On a more serious note, I really want to say thank you to the loyal (and even the fair weather) readers of Simple Scrapbooks over the years. We so appreciated your interest, support and passion. You can look forward to seeing the Simple message continue as part of Creating Keepsakes magazine in the future.

Now, does anyone have Cesar Milan’s mailing addy?

Cathy ZielskeThe options are limitless

136 Comments on “The options are limitless”

  1. #1

    Seriously, I go away for a weekend, not internet and this is the news I switch on to? Bummer is a bit of an understatement. Cathy, if nothing else you will keep us all rolling in the aisles – perhaps you might add comedienne to the prospective job list?

  2. #2

    Your limitless wit will allow you to succeed in any of these events. I personally am glad you will have MORE time to blog. I love your perspective.

    Thanks Cathy.

  3. #3
    Dianne Nelson

    Oh Cathy! While you are nannying for Ali in Oregon, you could drive up I-5 and visit me! (lol). I love your perspective and your sense of humor. Bret would totally appreciate you, if Dan would let you go, that is!

    Thanks for everything!

  4. #4

    Maybe the official memory documenting roadie for one of your favorite bands?

    A newspaper column in your future? Maybe humor can save the print media.

    As always, loving some laughter in my day.

  5. #5

    I’m so glad you are keeping up your blog, one of the fun little things in my life. My DH has a meeting today to find out what his future employment plans will be. Little scary.I will just keep singing “closing time” in my head.

  6. #7
    Jeanne Ann

    What about standup? Cathy, I luv ya girl, we like two peas in a pod! I am coming to grips with the whole merger idea and am willing to give it a chance and best of all I still get to read your blog! I love it!

  7. #8

    Motivational speaker? Importance of humour in the workplace? Designing your life for real using scrapbooking principles (you know, unity of purpose, etc – I’m sure it could cross into Human Resources!), How to Sing when Your Throat Aches? … There is no end to your ability to pick yourself up and I am in awe…

  8. #9

    I hope you will continue to inspire “simple” scrapbooking. You are a true leader in the industry. Why aren’t you designing prodcut???? If I were any of those scrapbook companies…I’d be snagging you up in a heartbeat!

  9. #10

    You are not a big enough ‘ho to be on Rock of Love. Sorry to dash your dreams.

    PS – Did you watch last night? What was up with the always crying sock stealing former adult film star? She’s nuttier than a squirrel turd. I’m kind of sad she is gone, because she was quite entertaining in a train wreck sort of way.

  10. #11

    I vote for the Cesar Milan job- he is so cute and that accent, wowzers. Oh yeah and he’s pretty dang good with those dogs too. Around this house he’s known as my boyfriend. Yes, I am married and a mother but heck I can dream, right?

    Once again I am blown away with your take on life. You are dealin’ with this just like I imagined you would. I know only good things will come your way.

  11. #12
    Angela Hancock

    Cathy what a great time to get a dog!!! Just a thought….

    I wish you all the best in wherever life takes you-even if it is to Whores on Wheels-Rock of Love Bus LOL

  12. #13
    annie samuels

    maybe you could become “urban woman”(you live in st. paul, dontcha?), ie the urban version of pioneer woman. you could have multiple tabs on your already great blog and do your own version of recipes (think minnesota state fair), a comedy tab with hysterical posts (like when you mimicked tom cruise’s indoctrination), a pet section (a la cesar), a graphic artist’s tip line…i mean really, with your sense of humor & your incredible creativity, you could turn your blog into a veritable industry like PW’s! You already have us (dear readers) so you’re good to go. And we totally love you.
    p.s. I did love your alternative job ideas though

  13. #15
    Jeanne Pellerin

    Cathy, if I don’t get my “Cathy fix”, I’m going to take my four kids (maybe my husband too), move to Minnesota, buy a house in your neighborhood and stalk you from up close until you take me in and make me the bff that I know I could totally be. You are top drawer, lady!

  14. #17

    I agree with Jeanne above,, I would definitely need to move to your neighborhood should your blog end at some point. I need my “Cathy fix”, too!!!!

    Totally agree, something needs to end before something else can begin. You never know what’s around the next corner.

  15. #19

    This is why I love your blog! Only you could mention Cesar Milan, Rock of Love Bus, P Diddy, and Chess King in the same post! Best of luck in whatever comes ahead!

  16. #20

    I absolutely adore your sense of humor!!!!Keep posting, it makes people happy. You are going to have no problem finding something else to do.

  17. #22
    lara jane

    Cathy, Cathy, Cathy. I love you so hard. Did you know you’re my ab workout for the day? I got in extra “crunches” reading the bit about Cesar. “Chh!”

  18. #23
    Kara Schwartz from Madison, WI

    As a recently unemployed 40 yr old, you give me hope! (I’ve considered many of your idieas, too! ha ha!!)

    Most of all – you give me hope – to dream big, to create my next adventure, to think outside the box, to find a career that I am passionate about, to keep my sense of humor, and to keep going!

    Keep doing what you do, Cathy! We love you!!
    Next, maybe talk show host? You could give Ellen a run for her money!!

  19. #25

    Okay. I’m officially holding you responsible for any muscles I may (here’s hoping…!!) develop in my stomach after laughing hysterically while reading this.
    Seriously – you rock!

  20. #26
    Jennifer Stewart

    Will you come crate train my new puppy? Oh, and he has diarrhea from stress of a new home. Fun! Now you wanna be Cesar? I wish the “chhh” worked for messing up a crate and a stack of towels. 🙂



  21. #27
    Sheila H

    You could rock it all! I had to laugh at I glanced at your banner and thought it said “Bits and Pie”!

  22. #28

    Cathy, I knew you’d come out laughing – you’re awesome!!!! I don’t care what you decide to do next – I just want to be along for the ride!

  23. #29
    Linh C.

    I think you should be a stand up comic. I think your YouTube videos will get picked up by an ad agency and offer you millions of dollars to use your video(s) in ad campaigns. Whatever direction you head in, please don’t stop blogging because you make us laugh. Thanks!

  24. #30

    I’m voting for the nanny for Ali. I live only 70 miles to the south and would love to meet you. I’d be in scrapbook heaven with you and Ali to the north and Karen Russell to the south. Heaven, I tell ya!

  25. #31

    So glad you aren’t leaving your faithful blog readers! So glad you always keep your sense of humor-even in the tough times.
    I am sure that some scrap industry biggie will be knocking at your door any day now. CZ is a total hot commodity! In the meantime – you now have more time for bloggin’, reality tv watchin’, exercising to meet your weight loss goals (right there with you gf!), and more time to scrap ‘just for you’. Cccchhh!

  26. #32
    Mary Jo

    Sigh…I will miss the magazine a lot! But you have me laughing so hard at all your “job prospects” :0)
    Just keep blogging and teaching great classes like your DYL and I’ll be happy.
    but I truly am sorry for you and all of the other staff members of SS. I can only imagine how hard this new is for all of you!

  27. #34
    Nancy Hyland

    LOL!! You are welcome to come and train our puppy any day and you could even Nanny for our daughter Fiona – I could definitely use your input on my pages, LOL!!

  28. #35
    Marcie Howe

    Cathy, I love opening up my Google reader every morning and seeing that you have a new post because I know there is serious laughter coming my way!

    Thanks for being YOU!!

  29. #36

    You really do have so many job opportunities! I love them all, especially the Target one since Target is my home away from home. Well in Ohio that is… you make me laugh, I love your scrapping style and I better see you in CK!

  30. #37
    Cathy Mauro

    Why isn’t Dog Sitting on that list? If you lived closer to VA I would totally be dropping my dog off when I needed to get away. As an added bonus you could do Clean & Simple Scrapping with Fido classes as part of your kenneling packing? We love you no matter what you do!

  31. #38

    I’d pay to read here. : ) I had just joined Simple Scrapbooks six months ago but liked it very much, especially your wisdom! Write another book!

  32. #39
    Nathalie (famille1999)

    Wow, thanks for still humoring us even if it must be very difficult to see something that you’ve work so hard on and along side many other fabulous people just stop like that. I’m sure that there are other great things for you out there but it will be a joy to still be able to read you and laugh with you on your blog. Good luck with it all.

  33. #42

    I’m glad to see your not losing your humor. While you came up with some very good alternative job ideas, I totally think you should design products and write another book. We cannot get enough of our Cathy!!! I’m glad to see you’re still going to blog. Don’t know what I’d do if I lost that too. Good luck to you. I know something great will happen for you.

  34. #43

    Simply put, you’re a hot shit. I thoroughly enjoy seeing what witty and clever stream of consciousness you will post each day. LOL
    Stay strong!

  35. #44
    Heidi Paul

    I love all your options….but I just assumed YOU would be part of ‘the merger.’ They definitely NEED you over there at CK to spice it up. Tell them WE NEED you over there. Did they even ask??

  36. #45

    Cathy, thanks for making me laugh this Monday morning. And I like how you didn’t mention how much you LOVE babies in the Ali nanny option! I know that whatever comes next for you, you WILL be a smashing success! Why? Because YOU ROCK!!!

  37. #46

    Wow. That sucks. I also assumed you would be part of the merger and it kind of leaves me thinking WTF? The fools. If that’s not an option, please let me put in a request for Clean & Simple III. Seriously Cathy, you need to make it a trilogy. I hope this will also free up your future for more Big Picture Scrapbooking classes.

  38. #47

    You are too much. I almost bust a gut laughing. I can totally see you making scrapbook pages titled “My Options Are Limitless: Jobs I Am Totally Qualified For.” In fact, you are halfway done. 🙂
    So glad you have a great sense of humor, I wish I had some.

  39. #50

    I’d say start with the Cesar job…I volunteer my Bichon Frise, Becks, as your first customer!!!

    I think you will find a fabulous new adventure and this will indeed, turn out to be a Good Thing. (props to Martha for that phrase!)

  40. #51

    Cathy, why don’t you consider becoming a stand up comedian as your next career path? You always make me laugh. If that doesn’t pan out, I agree with all of those suggesting that you write Clean and Simple III.

  41. #52

    OK, Rock of Love Bus Tour is a “no.” You know way too much for that. Overqualified. I love the nanny idea. If you get that gig, can we webcam Simon, too?

    I LOVE how you’re using your humor to move on from a sucky situation. And yes, when God closes a door, he opens a window. Now, when people said that to me, I wanted to close {aka SLAM} something in their faces, but it actually turns out to be true… every…single…time.

    You forgot… donations from your adoring fans. OR another 12 week BPS class… and I might keep up with that one {closing out week 8, baby!}.

  42. #53
    Kristi B


    Your thought provoking, laughter inducing & “real” posts are priceless! I am sorry about the job (and CK is *&%^$ if they don’t bring you over). You impact many lives daily with your Blog & you are appreciated!

  43. #54
    Laura B.

    I don’t think a Survivor contestant would be good for you Cathy. If i recall from a post a few days ago you and “nature” in the same sentence would be a no-no. LOL! I’m sure you will find the perfect way to spend your time soon.

  44. #55

    Sad to see Simple go, too. Sorry about that. On the other hand, I think CK needs a comedy column and you are the ONLY viable candidate. You make my day.

  45. #56

    You are too damn funny! I would love to see you on survivor! How about American Idol?

    What ever you do it will be Great! Hang in there. You always have your blog readers to keep entertained!!!!

  46. #57
    shari (tigsnbitz)

    I cant believe you forgot your most IMPORTANT option. Becoming paparazzi for Crowded House! You could combine your love for photography, and get your Neil fix in every day!

  47. #58

    You forgot stand up comedian, because everytime I read your blog, I get a good laugh, so certainly you would be good at it!!

  48. #60

    Check it out! Job offer two posts above mine! 🙂
    You put a big smile on my face today! Keep it up Cathy!

  49. #61
    Jeannette P

    Love your sinister & funny outlook on your options. I throughly enjoyed reading them. Now off to get my 2008 Christmas cards done…maybe I should have nixed them this year too but I took last year off & I already have the newsletters printed & the cards made. I’m just having trouble getting addresses for my crazy relatives. Sheesh…maybe I should call them valentine cards & then I’d be early. yup, that’s what I’ll do.

  50. #63
    Tammy M.

    Cahy you are such a hoot!! I think the Ali idea would be awesome….maybe ou could videotape your time together and make it into an awesome “Day in the Life” show or something….hey, it could work?!?!

  51. #64
    Jeanne Pellerin

    Oh, sorry for the second comment post of the day, but I was willing to pay $500 for “Design Your Life”. Seriously.

  52. #65

    I think Survivor could really use a breath of fresh air & YOU are it! That option is too funny!
    Good luck to you, Cathy! I know you will find your calling again & another amazing adventure is coming your way!

  53. #66
    Joan in Kingman

    You always amaze with your sense of humor. You are so funny. Thanks for that! You are right, you do have options. I like the nanny idea best. What fun blog posts you would have then. Hee, hee.

  54. #67

    For all of us over thirty-five and under 100 who secretly harbor the desire to watch any rock of love sequel, I think you would make it a prime time hit show! I do agree that a stand-up gig would also be dead on for you! You are the one blog I read each day to get inspiration and often a belly laugh or two! Good luck, thoughts and prayers!

  55. #68

    Hilarious!! I work at a Target and I think why be a cashier when your creative genius could be used elsewhere. How about a stationary buyer, or a job designing the instore signing, ad inserts, or other special promotional messages. Your style is a perfect fit for Target brand and you would still get an employee discount!

  56. #69

    Cathy: When I heard Simple will be no more I felt terrible….It was like my 6x a year bible study….then I thought WOW maybe Cathy can have more online classes! — So that is my hope….to heck with Target—Every person that took your class knows of your talent! If you need more students….I will hunt some up for you!

  57. #70
    Lisa Russell

    I’m praying that CK will pick you up as a writer and contributor, because I have two more years left on my subscription with them and it would be great to see you in there. Maybe even with your own little sub-set like Ali has. “Clean and Simple with CZ”. That would work! You didn’t mention trying out for Amazing Race?? You get to travel around the world and NOT get bitten by a million bugs. You just may have to bungee jump or eat something weird…or get a tattoo with an FF on your arm or shave your head. lol

  58. #71
    Susan W

    I say when one door closes another opens. I have faith that everything will work out for you.
    I will continue to read your blog since I think you totally and completely rock.

  59. #72

    Hilarious, I have to say having read your articles, books, and stalked the blog because you are FUNNY!… I have seen the layout about the air conditioner so I am certain that Survivor is out… does Ali have air, that might work for you! The Target gig would be rockin’ with the discount and all. In all seriousness, thanks for all the wonderful design lesson that you gave in Simple… I have learned so much from you and I really appreciate how you share your real life with the readers. Cheers, to a new day!
    PS Maybe you have time for a furry friend now ?!

  60. #73

    I know you will land on your feet doing something fabulous, that you enjoy.
    I have only ever gotten SS so I will miss it terribly. but I can continue to get my Cathy fix here!
    hugs to you

  61. #74
    Kim Strother

    Don’t know if you would want to- but why doesn’t CK keep you on as I’ve heard they are adding a portion of Simple to CK. They would be crazy not to grab you up!

    Thanks for being an inspirition and showing as all to keep your chin up, even in bad times. “Everything happens for a reason” is my motto!

  62. #76
    Shaun McPherson

    You would be great in the music world. You wood rock any of their worlds:) Take it from somebody who has known you since third grade. You are one of the funniest people to be around. You have alway’s put smile on my face you could help anyone with their job to go futher. People who know people need to reach out and help you. I have some srapebooking you can do and cleaning. Pay is not high pretty low 🙁 but i would take you anyday! love u girl shaun

  63. #77
    Korey Lindberg

    Mine I LOVED this post…so funny! The part about being on Survivor…HILARIOUS…and I know you; you would NOT talk about writing the books at all…you would probably not even talk about the scrapbooking. I think they would be more sick of hearing your obsession with certain musical talents. **Giggle**

    Alls I gotta say is I would not vote you off at all…you would totally be the life of the tribe!

  64. #81

    as a surviour fan… i laughed laughed laughed at that idea – im with you on that….. the idea appeals until i think about the heat, bugs, no bed, no shower and annoying people!
    but there might be something in it. geoff ahs to give up that job sometime – maybe you could front it??!?!!!!
    tho i think i have to agree with someone elses stand up comic comment – you could SO do that!
    best wishes in whatever you choose to do, or whatever chooses you :)!

  65. #83

    ROFL! Gosh, I sure HOPE you don’t give up your blog! And I do hope you turn up in CK more than just every-so-often – that would be a shame if they didn’t use your talents and humor! (mini-albums for dogs-love it! :D)

  66. #84

    Options are good! I can’t wait to see where your adventures take you. I know I’m going to mourn the loss of Simple as a reader…I can’t imagine what it feels like for you. Thanks for the continuous inspiration and laughs!

  67. #85

    You are going to get me fired! I am work trying to “research” on the internet and you are making me laugh out loud. I am so sorry to see Simple go – but I am excited to see what you will do next.

  68. #86

    Dear Cathy
    I’m sorry to hear you have lost your job, which I know you really loved. Love your blog, love your work. You can come to Australia to visit again – our dollar has hit the skids so we are CHEAP! Might not be any work here either tho. 🙁



  69. #87
    Mona McCowen

    I planned on renewing my subscription. I just got busy. It’s. All. My. Fault. And P.S. Creating Krapsakes is no substitute! It’s your design style that made the whole thing worth reading. Oh well. You still got it, though. You could probably make a living just doing classes a couple times a year and live off your blog like dooce. I’d click on your ads.

  70. #88

    I say stand-up too! You are so very funny! I’m so glad that you will continue your blog. It is one of few must reads for me.

  71. #91

    I can help with the Cesar gig… no I don’t have any contact with him but I’m willing to send you Harley (AKA the world’s worst dog) and let you train her up. When Cesar sees your mad dog training skillz surely he’ll hire you. And I won’t charge you for keeping her or anything!

  72. #92

    No Cesar M connection… but I also love RED. Let me know when you are ready to put on your Fast Fun and Friendly pants!!

  73. #93
    Nancy C. from Wilmington, NC

    I’m thrilled that you are keeping the blog going no matter what you’re up to. Reading your blog is usually the laugh highlight of my day. I assumed you were going to be incorporated into the new CK since Angie Lucas mentioned that all of our faves, and she specifically mentioned you, would be back in some role. Please tell us she is right! But if we have to go with one of your back-up plans, I think you’d be a perfect assistant for Cesar.

  74. #94

    You know what else you’d be good at? Working at The Container Store! When I see you (when, when…) at CHA, I’ll give you a “Recruiting” card, and you can bring that in with you when you get back to MN! 😉

    You’re so awesome. No matter what you do, I’ll be reading…

  75. #95

    Cathy, you crack me up! I would totally vote for #1 because you and Ali are my scrapbooking heroes and it would be so cool if you were together all the time. OK, maybe Aidan and Cole wouldn’t want to move to OR, but they’d get over it, right? And I totally agree that this blog post should be a layout. Good luck to you, I’m sure you’ll find a way to continue doing what you love, because you’re so good at it!

  76. #97
    Judi W

    HI Cathy, I just finished taking your “Design Your Life” class via BPS and anyone as talented as you are, anyone who provides her clients/employer with as much MAJOR BANG for their BUCK as you provide, anyone as hard working, personable and as knowledgeable as you are is Never going to be without options.
    Let GO of the worry, Let God or the universe (however you like to think of it) provide because if you even get back a quarter of what you give out, you’re still going to be well taken care of and happy.
    I’ll be following your blog and interested to see just what the next chapter in your life is going to be.
    Here’s to Great Things just around the next corner.

  77. #100

    LOL I was worried youd be mired in greif for weeks! Glad to hear that you have pulled yourslef up by your bootstraps, and that youre keeping this blog!! Remember now you can let the sh!t word fly since youre not officially representin’ anymore!LOL Hope we make you laugh as much as you do us!

  78. #103
    Mary Rogers

    thanks Cathy!
    I am ROTFLMAO this morning – which I understand is good for weight loss as well.

  79. #105

    I think you need to be a columnist. I would read it faithfully just like I read your blog faithfully.

    Good Luck in whatever you decide to do.

  80. #108

    rock on, Cathy! I have to admit that I am shamefully addicted to the train-wreck of a show, Rock of Love Bus Tour 2. . .you’d be a welcome breath of fresh air (man, i bet their breath reeks from all the booze/puke/stripper poles). anyway, I just wanted to show some love for you no matter what doors open for you next. I LOVED Simple & will quietly mourn this loss.

  81. #110

    Thanks for the laugh and postive outlook. I am sure you won’t have any problem finding a new focus. I recently went through a similar life/job change. You will be great at whatever you do!

  82. #111
    Sue Hyer

    I was at Target today and just had to smile every time I saw an employee in their red shirts! You’d look waaaay better, I’m sure! I want to tell you that taking your DYL class and reading your blog has changed my life! I am now HOOKED on everything to do with “Twilight” and am on book #3, plus just bought the CD (at Target, of course). I also caught your post on Richard Marx, who happens to be my all-time favorite singer, and you linked me to his website and I now own 3 new CD’s of his, which I had no idea existed! And…. I sat down to scrapbook the other day and I used lines and repetition and balance, all without having to think about it! Like I said, you’ve changed my life! You DO rock!!!

  83. #113

    You could come to Napa where you would never freeze again, drink copious amounts of wine, and be my personal scrapbook trainer.

    Well, maybe not your best option, but it would work for me:)

  84. #115
    Martha Thomas

    I saw this and thought of you. Although I don’t know you, I read your blog all the time and I kinda thought you’d appreciate the humor!

    **60 above zero:**

    Floridians turn on the heat.
    People in Minnesota plant gardens.

    *50 above zero:**

    Californians shiver uncontrollably.
    People in Duluth sunbathe.

    *40 above zero:**

    Italian & English cars won’t start.
    People in Minnesota drive with the windows down.

    *32 above zero:**

    Distilled water freezes.
    The water in Bemidji gets thicker.

    20 above zero:**

    Floridians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves, wool hats.
    People in Minnesota throw on a flannel shirt.

    *15 above zero:*
    New York landlords finally turn up the heat.
    People in Minnesota have the last cookout before it gets cold.

    *Zero: *

    People in Miami all die.
    Minnesotans close the windows.

    *10 below zero:**

    Californians fly away to Tahiti .
    People in Minnesota get out their winter coats.

    *25 below zero:*

    Hollywood disintegrates.
    The Girl Scouts in Minnesota are selling cookies door to door.

    40 below zero:*

    Washington DC runs out of hot air.
    People in Minnesota let the dogs sleep indoors.

    100 below zero:**

    Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
    Minnesotans get upset because they can’t start the Mini-Van.

    *460 below zero: **

    ALL atomic motion stops (absolute zero on the Kelvin scale.)
    People in Minnesota start saying…”Cold ’nuff fer ya?”

    *500 below zero:*

    Hell freezes over.
    Minnesota public schools will open 2 hours late.

  85. #116

    You are by far my favorite blogger! You keep my spirits up as I too mourn the demise of Simple Scrapbooks. Cesar Milan is based in LA, which is a heck of a lot warmer than Minnesota!

  86. #117

    I have already emailed CK to tell them they need to keep your creativity and philosophy alive!!! All of the friends of SS will miss this wonderful publication but hope that you will be a continuing, significant part of CK (although I did enjoy reading your options!!)

  87. #118
    Jennifer Larson

    Cathy, you are terrific. Thanks for making me feel chipper when I otherwise felt in the dumps. And I do love Simple.

  88. #119

    Can’t you simple ladies just go grass roots and print your own magazine??? You KNOW we’d all read it even if it were printed on the copy machine at the local SuperAmerica. Come on, think about it!!!

  89. #120

    ok, i’ve got to look up what doula is, but i’m thinking this is good news for your carple tunnel issues. omg, look ali left a comment!! I am old enough to remember Chess King and am now experiencing frightening flashbacks to high school!!

  90. #121

    first, i always read your blog through reader and just saw your banner… and immediately burst out laughing! that is the best banner ever! if i get brave and stop blaming the baby for my weight gain i am totally copying you!

    second, i don’t have his addy. Sorry.

    third, totally and utterly heart broken about Simple. I just let someone borrow all my issues and IMMEDIATELY called her to make sure she gives them back! Collectors items! That was the first mag I ever subscribed to. I found my first blogs there. I was inspired to scrap there and blog there. I was just plain old inspired.

    UGH. Stupid economy.

  91. #122

    Too funny! Sitting over here in WI and having met you at a past CKU and religiously reading and sharing your books and being both a Simple and CK long time subscriber I know this – you are about to do something even better! I can’t wait! And I’ll be there – first in line to purchase/read/watch – whatever it is. Don’t keep us waiting too long!

  92. #123
    Kathy Griffith

    Those are great job aspirations. When you find yours can you look for a new one for me too as I feel I am soon to be out of job also. Since I am way older than you, this will be a little harder to think of good jobs. I work for a fine art giclee printer and artwork is NOT what the artists or customers are buying these days. So wish us both luck that we survive.
    Good luck and will keep checking your blog for that Rock Band job.

  93. #124
    julie s.

    The fact that you once worked at the Skate Deck… seriously that might be the coolest thing ever!! lol

    I just totally think you rock and love that your sense of humor is in tact.

  94. #125
    Stephi D.

    I really hope CK realizes what a treasure they have in you. Wait, that sounded dorky, but I hope you know what I mean. Your take on things is what has kept this hobby fresh for years now, and I hope they utilize your talents fully in the pages of CK.

  95. #126

    I’m sorry this has happened it can be a great shock (I know it was for me) in my 37 years I have been made redundant 4 times! Out of 5 jobs (not including temping & filler jobs) and the job I’m in now may not last. But the one thing I know to be true is that the phrase “when one door closes another one opens” is very appt as each time something better came along, I have sometimes had to wait a bit but it has always been a better situation. So I can only say hang in there, something great should just be round the corner. Keeping my fingers crossed, Seeya Hugya *G*

  96. #127

    Oh man are you hilarious! I love reading your blog. You have so many skills and are such an inspiration… you will be successful in whatever you decide to do.

  97. #130
    Jane S.

    Through my tears about SS, I’ve actually been thinking about how you could spend your time, too, so we wouldn’t lose your inspiration. How about another BPS class? Or a book from the last class? But, dang it, there’s so many others who inspired me — Beth Proudfoot, Rebecca Cooper, Margaret Scarborough, etc.– and I just don’t believe I’ll see as much as I need of them in CK. Boo hoo over and over.

  98. #131
    Tracy Anderson

    You absolutely crack me up…

    And, if you want a hook-up with Cesar, I think I can help… back in 2005, we went out to Cali for my DH’s cousin’s wedding. While there, we had an opportunity to visit the Dog Psychology center. YES… I’ve ACTUALLY been there. And, it was AWESOME. And I have pictures to prove it. AND, they are scrapbooked 🙂

    We even have Cesar’s cellphone number… well, we have the number he used back in 2005. I should give him a ring and see if it still works…. I could let him know this really cool chick named Cathy Z needs a job…

    Love ya, Cathy… remember that one door closing is just the precursor to another awesome door opening. You ROCK! 🙂

  99. #132

    Wow do I relate to this. My DH lost his job for almost a year and we would try to brainstorm about jobs or businesses we could do however you are much more brave than I! I mean with my luck I would be the one the naked person would rub up against on “Survivor”. If I was Cesar’s assistant the “Red Zone” pit bull would always go for me and bite me in an extremely sensitive and inappropriate place ensuring that that would be the viral internet post of the month. Worst yet, I would win “Rock of Love” and be stuck with that weirdo forever.

  100. #135
    Erin C.

    I am so incredibly sad right now. I let all of my other scrapbooking subscriptions expire just to keep this one because I felt it was the best of the best. I got so excited every month when it arrived, and even my back issues have ideas that still ROCK to this day! I felt like this was the one mag that was timeless and I don’t know what I will do without it (probably just cry). I am so sorry Cathy, because I am sure it was the best job EVER, as most people would love to aspire to do graphic design for the hobby they love (I know, because I am both a graphic designer and a scrapbooker too). I cannot imagine the grief you are feeling right now and I wish you the best of luck! Keep your chin up! Thank you for keeping your blog up too because I don’t need even more depressing news… it would just completely send me into a coma. Maybe in your spare time we can convince you to write another book!!! I for one would buy it!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *