Fantasy baseball draft widow.
If these four simple words mean something to you, then you can relate to what I'm about to write about. Or maybe just two words will suffice:
First let me say this: I love sports. From curling to steeplechase, if a sport has a good story behind it, I'll be the first to cheer for the winners and sympathize with the losers. Truly. I'm a sucker for sports. Want to see me bust out the ugly cry? Ask me to tell you how "Miracle" ends. Or "Brian's Song." The nerve that sports hit runs deep through the American psyche, and I would never, ever poo-poo this intense connection some of us have to all things competitive
But fantasy baseball and fantasy football and fantasy [insert your sport of choice here]? Maybe that's where it all goes just a bit too far.
As my adorable husband spent a full 8 hours last Saturday (and countless prior hours hunched over before a glowing laptop in preparation leading up to the so-called draft day) I thought: "Who am I to criticize how one chooses to hobby?" I mean, you could easily point to scrapbooking and make a similar case, that case being: well, that too, is a colossal waste of time.
I beg to differ, and offer these points in support of my argument.
1. Scrapbooking provides the opportunity to preserve and share the stories of a lifetime, encouraging its participants to use their unique and singular voices to record and document that which makes up who they are and what matters most. It encourages self expression and artistic exploration, often creating a deep and fulfilling sense of doing something of both a highly intrinsic and external value to the hobbyist. It saves bits of life, one page at a time, to share not only with future generations, but to remind us in the present day how blessed and lucky we are to be in this journey of life.
2. Fantasy baseball is technically not real.
point well made!
I couldn’t have said it better myself!
Lisa H. says
I too am the widow of a fantasy baseball enthusiast, PLUS, my dh has been the commissioner of his league for over 20 years! I really like it because I can count on spending lots of uninterrupted time on my hobbies the first weekend of April every year. Woo-hoo!
I hear ya, except to say that for our little family of all boys and me being the winner of a ‘league’ be it football, March madness, or whatever, keeps the braggin down a bit.
I mean it keeps THEIR bragging down, I’ll rub it in all I want thankyouverymuch. and NO I did not spend hours analyzing. 10 minutes and I won. ha… how’s ‘dem apples?
(as for fantasy baseball we haven’t gone there because, well… who needs more agony tied to our beloved baseball season?)
Kristen DeSimone says
I am forwarding this post to my husband, the fantasy baseball obsessed goober who has the nerve to walk past my studio and shake his head at all the “stuff” in there! To make it worse he is in a league with a guy I work with so I hear it at work AND at home!!! lol
Katy, i should point out that back in 1990, when dan and i first began dating, I had my own fantasy football team, called “The Great Big Huskies” and as I recall, they weren’t so good. ; )
I’ve been a fantasy baseball widow for 22 years and now my 14-year-old boy is playing it, too! Welcome to the club. That’s why I have my hobbies, too.
Well you gave me a giggle… which is kind of a strange as I am sitting here listening to Patti Smith sing “Helpless’. Thanks for the insight into all things American.
Fabiana Moraes says
You could have been a lawyer…
sue Treiber says
I am so lucky my hub doesn’t get into stuff like this!
It’s bad enough that my 9 year old is constantly spewing stats.
Melissa LaFavers says
You’re so funny, CZ. Thanks for the laugh. I can always use one!
Oh my God … how true. As a good, new wife last year, I even had my own fantasy football team … I figured there *has* to be something to pretending you have a team … WRONG! Three hours of my life I’ll never get back. But … considering that it’s his one vice – I’ll let him have it. The day he does Fantasy Fly Fishing though, we’ve got a problem.
Karen Grosz says
Oh so can relate to this. It is fantasy football here and already my husband is starting to go through info for the end of Aug draft. Oh boy.
LOL I am so glad my husband doesn’t get into sports fantasy or otherwise! But he does shake his head when he sees the mess that I create during my creative hours and at the collection of supplies in my cubby. When he does this I just point out that it’s better than hours spent playing “Leisure Suit Larry” or “Turok.”
Amy Zarrella says
I just look at fantasy football as a way to get my husband out of the house for a Saturday and out of my hair, giving me more time to scrapbook!
In my case its not my husband, its my 19 year-old daughter!! All I can say is she better be studying her text books at college as much as she’s fretting putting the injured Joe Mauer on all her fantasy teams!
What can you do….
I hear you Cathy. My only thought is actually a memory. When my 37 year old brother had a stroke 2 years ago, the only thing that would temporarily lift his spirits was talking about his fantasy baseball team and where they stood. Otherwise he was pretty well bummed being so young and so debilitated. So, while I don’t get the whole thing..because of my experience with my brother, I’m good with it.
I guess you could do a whole spread sheet thing about time and money invested versus return. Or you could just ask, Does it make him happy? Does it hurt us? Two yeses say leave it alone and do not try to understand.
I mean, men like to chase a little white ball for hours and what do they come home with? Stale beer breath and sunburn.
Women (not me, really) go shopping for hours. What do they come home with, stuff they can wear and use!
And they say men are the hunters?
Maybe I’m more easy going, but I look at the positives – he’s not hitting the bars, he’s not chasing other women [especially not wearing that snazzy hat!], and as long as he picked Sergio Romo from the SF Giants on his fantasy baseball team, what really is there to fuss about? 🙂 🙂
My husband and I had a good laugh about this as we are in EXACTLY the same position as you and Dan right now. We just had this same conversation.
Oh well, I guess there are a billion things he could be doing that could be worse….
Nicole Snow, SLC Scrapbooking Examiner says
I went to the MemoryWorks retreat last year, and it was AWESOME! Looking forward to the giveaway!
Kirsten Juenke says
Ah yes, as a member of the Fantasy Football Widow’s Club, I know what you mean. And just you wait until Cole joins him, as my son did…I tell myself at least he’s not out at a bar eyeing hoochie mamas…but the draft and the mid-season draft…those are two days I dread. Although he did win $400 last season. But he didn’t share.
I’ve got one on you. Mine does FANTASY FISHING!
elsa velez says
Clap, clap, clap, clap.
Hilarious. I can’t stop giggling about it.
Love how you just totally shredded your husband on the world wide web. Take that, Dan!
I love scrapbooking and I’m also the proud owner of my own fantasy football team. What does that say about me. No, don’t answer that.
Well, mine does not do the fantasy thing, but he does do the real thing…literally to the exclusion of everything else. We have this ‘joke’ in our family that dad takes care of the baseball, and mom takes care of everything else. Believe it or not, this does have it’s benefits. And you would not believe the expression of abject agony on his face if ever I utter the words: “It’s just a game…” (To which he responds with a litany of reasons that baseball mirrors life, and prepares them for a productive adulthood.)
LOL you kill me.
Oh and as a MemoryWorks Retreat Alum can I just say be there or be square as there is nothing that compares to the AWESOME pampering you will get!
Shanon Gibson says
My husband is a fantasy sports junkie! He spends about an hour or so every morning looking up stats, making changes and adjusting his rosters. He plays fantasy baseball, football and hockey. We both play in the same fantasy hockey league but I make changes just once a week (and you can tell).
Cindy Tolbert says
Amen, sister. What’s up with these boys and their balls? (Get mind out of gutter, I mean baseball, football, etc.)
Kathy Travis says
Ok, so the husband has been in a fantasy baseball ‘league’ for the entire 21 years of our marriage. I believe he’s been in the second ‘league’ for at least the last 10. this year, he traveled to Las Vegas to take part in some silly national fantasy league event/draft. Imagine – a few days away from home and time to spend with friends and he spends 6 hours ‘drafting’.
If that isn’t enough, we spent the last week in Disneyworld with the kids. On our first Saturday he spent 5 hours on the phone/laptop drafting for his second (third?) ‘league’. It was 85 degrees and sunny outside.
I love sports. But fantasy baseball is just dorky. At least it provides me with another reason to make fun of him!
Fantasy Leaguer’s wife here, and I get him some snacks for his draft day party each year. It’s given him another bond with his sons, who also join in, and I use that quiet time to get out my scrapbook supplies and play. As the other ladies have mentioned, there are so many other things our guys could be doing that would give us real fits. This is nothing. It’s fun and … it’s sports! (Go Yankees …)
lynne moore says
Oh cool … Memory Works! I went to the retreat last year and am going agian. Too much fun…
My husband wants to create “fantasy orchestra,” where you create ideal orchestras and have concerts/contests or something like that. Sigh… Thankfully he’s too busy to actually start it.
I used to be the “consultant” to a friend who owned a fantasy baseball team – you’re right – they spend hours at it. I decided to graduate to the real thing: watching real Braves baseball on TV while I am scrapbooking – the best of both worlds!!
dan zielske says
what exactly was your point here?
Julie Johnson says
I know exactly where you are coming from Cathy!! My EX-husband was a fantasy football FREAK and spent months creating his teams and planning his draft picks and so on. I found it incredibly silly until I discovered Scrapbooking and then I was glad he had his thing so I could do mine.
Course he still continued to be a royal A%@ so I had to divorce him!
Jennifer H says
Bravo, Bravo (insert hand claps)
AMEN SISTER!!!!! WHOOOOOOO
Amy v says
Oh my gosh I laughed so hard when I read this!
Any hobby that involves glitter glue is not a real hobby.
Somebody has Dan’s back in this joint.
Cathy, my wife and sister-in-law both read your blog and I rec’d a note on this from my sister-in-law. I agree with your scrapbooking vs. fantasy baseball point in terms of value. I inheirited in excess of 50 scrapbooks and photo albums from my grandmother when she died. They are something that I will treasure forever. My wife has endured my fantasy baseball hobby for the entire time we have been together as well as a Wiffleball league that I set up in my back yard for a couple of summers. However, I will say that by having a fantasy baseball team for the last 10 years it has allowed me to keep up with baseball more closely than I have in the past and appreciate the overall sport. I follow other teams around the league not just my beloved St. Louis Cardinals, thereby making me a more knowledgable fan. But besides all that, the fact is that guys like competition and I have won my league 2 out of the past three years and finished second the other year in turn netting me over $300 in the process! May not be much…but it’s a lot of fun to a baseball junkie. Now if I could just find a good Strat-O-Matic baseball league to join.
One could argue that both hobbies have the capacity to turn obsessive. However, Fantasy Football nearly cost me my marriage, whereas Scrapbooking has merely cost me my spending money. I beseech you to tell me which is the lesser of two evils.
Thanks for the good laugh Cathy–at my house it is Age of Empires and msuical instruments! He can spend a whole day either on the computer or playing one of our 40 or so instruments–he is in 5-6 different music groups–BUT he never complains about the $$ or time of scrapbooking!
Mary Claire says
How awesome is a husband who leaves comments on scrapbooking blogs…sigh. I love you honey!
You really should be a stand up comic…you are hysterical.
Tiffany H says
HA! Too funny…my husband is not into the fantasy football thing-oh but if I hear about one more ‘great deal’ on some ‘old truck’ that he could fix up…I swear he would be perfectly happy living in a junkyard-and if I let him have his way our yard would be covered in old crappy cars. At least my scrapbooking stuff looks pretty-even if it does occupy a little bit of every room in the house!
Sue Hyer says
We don’t have Fantasy Football in our house, but have you heard of World of Warcraft? It’s an online game which is a total time-sucker, with absolutely nothing to show for that time! And I mean hours and hours and hours. My husband and 2 of my sons are into this, and there have been times when they can’t come to dinner because they are in the middle of a “raid” (whatever the heck that is). And if we have to go somewhere, I need to give them about 3 hours notice so they can plan for it. No matter how much my husband complains about the space I take up with my scrapbooking supplies, it will never compare to the space he’s taking up in his brain with that stupid game!
Maybe we could have Fantasy Scrapbooking and someone else would finish all of our albums and we could enjoy the results …. NAH!
Amen to that!
Nancy Hyland says
although my lovely husband is not a Fantasy sports guy, he is in a completely different realm of fantasy. The fantasy computer games.
RPGs as they are fondly referred to (Role Playing Games for the rest of us). You may be familiar with the Dungeons and Dragons games of yore, these are but the more “modernized” versions of D&D where they live, fight and talk like people of the middle ages – how that is modern I am not sure… what drives me bonkers is that there is no pause to this game. it is played in “real time” and if there is a battle, my aforementioned husband – now turned Dark Lord Wizzard Slayer of Arabel, cannot leave his post to, say, help me watch our daughter, take out the trash or mow the grass.
I too, hate to judge how one chooses a hobby, I know I often get a little too giddy reading a Scrapbooking magazine, book, blog or forum post. My husband has even said to me in a sexy voice “Come to me like I am big pile of paper and glitter!!!” I get it. We all get a little over involved in our hobby obsessions. But like you, I have tried to expain to my husband that he really isn’t a wizard and that the city of Arabel that he is valiantly trying to protect from undead squirrels who are running amok, is not really a REAL city. The response I am given is, “Honey, Arabel is a real city, its a suburb of Detroit.” *Sigh* I too am a fantasy widow…
AMEN!!!!! (I’m going to copy and save your explanation for a future discussion with my DH!!!) 😉
Margy Eastman says
Feel your pain, Cathy. My DH is in two fantasy football leagues each year. However, last year he had a bunch of Packers and won their Super Bowl and some cash. If that’s how he rolls, I’m ok with it.
Margy in North Pole (formerly of Green Bay)
Kathy F says
Cathy- You are a kick in the pants! LOL! 🙂 I think you have won the argument (I know you weren’t arguing)! 🙂
I too was once critical of this past time, but now am a part of it. I was asked a couple of years ago to be the “10th” team in a league so they could just get-on-with-it. My husband didn’t count on me taking it seriously and being in first place for 8 straight weeks. HA! And now living states away from family and friends its a way for us to stay connect via fantasy sports. And of course, my blog!
omg my husband did the same thing the other day 8 hours to get ready for his draft for the fantasy baseball he plays in..ugh lol I’m with you… Our scrapbooking is way better!
I’m as confused by Fantasy sports as the rest of you, however as a largely digital scrapbooker I get some of the same criticism from my DH as I Oooo and Ahhhh over the latest “paper” by my favorite digital designer. I work for hours on my digital layouts, and he also says that my work is ‘not real.’ Until I get my layouts printed, at which time they become “real.” As I’ve told DH, his Fantasy football becomes “real” when he brings the cash home!! 😉
You are so right, you couldn’t be any more right and Dan is completely, utterly WRONG! hee hee!
michelle tabb says
Fantasy Baseball and Football Widow here as well. Thanks for making me smile. I do believe you’re spot on in your assessment between Scrapbooking vs. Fantasy BB.
10 year FBB widow. do i get a 10 year pin, like i did for work? i shared your entry with my husband. his reply…”She’s a hater…. F-Ball is cheaper :)” he thinks he’s so funny. somehow i knew it would come down to the dollar. he’s a cpa.
Corinna Lyons-Revello says
Oh, Cathy, you totally crack me up! I love the way you just simply state Fantasy baseball is not real. LOL Nuff said. Thankyouverymuch. I laughed so hard! haha
Free Sports Betting says
Fantasy Baseball is America’s Pastime. It is NOT a waste of time. lol