Tales from the Scale: The April Fool’s Edition

Cathy ZielskeCZ Life126 Comments

Evildoer

Sigh. Where to begin?

Three months ago I started back on Operation Chub Reduction and as of last friday's Moment of Truth, I'm down a cumulative five.

(Please, hold your thunderous applause until the end after all of the speakers have spoken. Thank you.)

You know what sucks? I like food. A lot. It's like my own personal brand of heroin. (Thanks for the line, Edward Cullen.) I like to put it on plates, and then eat it. Food, that is. Sometimes, I don't even need the plate. I can just grab it from inside its original packaging and eat it that way. I particularly like the foods known as Potato Chips, Reeses Peanut Butter Cups and Sprite. Those are some of my favorites.

You know what else sucks? I'm not a big exerciser. I mean, sure… I can walk. And not only can I, but I do almost EVERY LOVIN' DAY without fail. I lace up my walking shoes, turn on E Entertainment Television underground in my home gym/bomb shelter, and spend 30 minutes shakin' what my mama gave me while learning about what a really great guy Zac Efron is, or how Nicole Ritchie weighs 80 pounds soaking wet.

But not once do I love how it makes me feel. It's just another checked box on my List of Things to Endure If I Ever Want to Stop Whining About My Chub.

And I really AM feeling a bit whiny today, so bear with me, when I say this: dieting blows. No, I mean it. It really, really, really, really does.

I like to torture myself, so I picked up that new issue of People magazine because a) I needed to learn all about Valerie Bertinelli's triumphant return to a bikini and b) there really ARE well-written articles in that magazine.

As I finished the article, I felt empty. I desperately wanted Valerie to tell me about the newly discovered Amazonian Rain Forest beetle whose droppings, when mixed with simple tap water, produced AMAZING weight loss results! But no. Apparently it was achieved through good old fashioned knee injuring running and eating virtually none of my preferred foods.

Here's the deal: I'm going to give myself a good few days to wallow in my self pity before refocusing and moving past this current state of disarray. I just needed to check in and keep it real.

REAL SUCKY, that is.

Dieting blows.

Cathy ZielskeTales from the Scale: The April Fool’s Edition

126 Comments on “Tales from the Scale: The April Fool’s Edition”

  1. #2
    Sandy

    Cathy, instead of “dieting”, why don’t you pick several foods/beverages that you could cut out of your diet and then eat everything else you normally would. I cut out soda and wine (most of the time!) and it really makes a difference. Also with the spring coming soon to St. Paul, walk outside – it will be a better workout.

  2. #3
    Julie

    Once before, you wrote about weight loss and someone recommended the book “The Truth About Beauty,” by Kat James. I read it, and it’s really great. I have only lost 20 pounds in the year since I’ve read it, and I certainly could lose a lot more, but I feel and look so much better. I’m also not having any trouble keeping it off. I’d recommend it as an interesting read and a new way to think about eating. I would still be first in line for the beetle droppings though!

  3. #4
    Valerie

    You’ll get no encouragement from me I’m afraid!

    I suffered last year for 2 months from a deprivation of all things tasty (it was HARD – AND i was easy on myself by letting me have a little something every other day so that I might have at least a chance of sticking with it).I did not enjoy it BUT I persevered and lost about 3 lbs total. I’m getting older & it would take way more effort to lose what I want to lose than I’m prepared to endure. THEREFORE i am trying to embrace my little bit of chub!
    By the way a helpful hint – it’s all relative. If you were a stone lighter you’d feel great BUT was there a time you might have considered THAT weight too much? I just say to myself if I’d lost 3 stone to get to my current weight I’d be feeling fantastic so why not pretend I have & learn to love my rolls (sigh)?

  4. #5
    sharon

    I hear you, and totally agree, it SUCKS. And I’m no good at it – that’s why I’ve lost 0. But I agree with Valerie about perception – the figure I’ve in my head to get down to, is what I felt was too much at the time I weighed that (before babies 2 & 3)- but if I ever get there, I might then reconsider…from where we sit, you look just fine!!

    But, geez, wouldn’t that beetle juice be great?

    Hey, remember that muscles weighs more than fat – that walking has got to be doing you some good!! πŸ™‚ Chin up!

  5. #6
    Monica McNeill

    I’m with you sister. I’ve been on WW for about two months faithfully following the points system and after 7 weeks not even 5lbs. UGH I switched to Filling Foods for a week and finally it got me to 6lbs lost. But then life interrupted and due to high levels of stress at work I was not a faithful follower. Now I’m back to a grand total of only 3lbs lost. UGH My deadline is insight though so while you wallow I’ll get rid of my object of stress and I’ll be in to refocus with you. I’m with you sister.

  6. #7
    Mette Thomas

    i’m with you everywhere i go the desire to sink my teeth into the next snack i am dreaming off takes over. i dont think i was born with any dieting self control. MIne is soo well used in other areas there isnt any left for the food thing? I have gained 2 kilos since goign on my diet hmmmmmm just not worth it i tell ya

    I tried to be “good” today while i was out and bought a yummy chicken foccacia but alas i followed it with a HUGE iced chocolate that was chock full of icecream and topped with soo much whipped cream – yummy though LOL

    Mette x

  7. #8
    Lisa

    Dieting sucks. If it didn’t, we would all be thin. I eat, breathe and sleep the diet and honestly it’s tiring. I’m only 3 pounds from my goal by giving up most carbs (in the form of rice, potatoes and white flour)and alcohol. Hang in there and take it one day at a time.

  8. #9
    patti

    my theory is that the world was meant to weigh so much…when one person loses, another person gains…i am ALWAYS on the the wrong end…kinda like that super short line in the supermarket that waits for you to get in it before revealing that it is the PRICE CHECK lane…chin up πŸ™‚

  9. #10
    Diane

    I so totally hear everything ya saying…My problem is the same…I just like food. I don’t eat because I am depressed/unloved and I am not using food to medicate… I just bloody well love the taste of it…all of it!!!!
    I start with a personal trainer tomorrow and just got stuck into a big slice of fruit flan…ops!!!

  10. #11
    Cheri

    I signed up for the free one week trial at WW and after a week of practically starving myself, the scale had not moved an ounce. Not one single tiny little bit. Then I remembered that the last time I was counting points I lost like 5 lbs in 5 months (and yes, I was faithful). I unsubscribed. Now I’m looking for a different plan to follow, since obviously that one does not work for me.

  11. #12
    zewa

    Cathy, I think this is an April Fools and you really probably already lost 10…..so keep going!!

    Zewa

  12. #14
    Kris Van Allen

    It totally sucks. I hate to excercise. Well, I hate to sweat. And I live in Austin Texas, so we sweat year round sitting still. The first 45 came off so easily, and the last 10 got so hard. Then I had a hysterectomy (yeah, baby! I mean, no baby, but so happy!) and put 10 on during recovery.

    I hate this. Suckage. Major suckage. Wallowing with you…allowing myself 2 days of wallow, then back at it.

  13. #15
    remember moments

    I couldn’t agree with you more about dieting totally sucking. I actually enjoy exercising but can’t find enough time to fit it in btw grad school and a 14 month old. I cannot seem to lose this 17 lbs of baby weight anywhere and it’s driving me batty!!

  14. #16
    Sandi

    I too bought People with Valerie on the cover in hopes of giving me some motivation not to eat!!

  15. #17
    Elisabeth

    My husband started the same day as you and he’s down 10 lbs, on WW. But he goes to the meetings. He finds it keeps him honest having to check in with people: “hello, my name is…and I love food…”. BTW he loves food too, and I love to cook. Honestly, we have not changed anything of what we eat for supper: what has changed are the snacks: there are no bad snacks in the house, only fruit.

    As for walking on your treadmill: HELLO! Walk outside! I do it everyday, and not to lose weight, because I love it! Bring your camera, walk fast for 30 minutes and, when you want to take a break, take pictures. I have also taken to bringing my tape recorder with me and talk into it (whatever ideas pop into my head.) This time of year, the birds are out, I don’t even listen to my iPod, I’m so happy that it’s spring. Trust me, your soul will thank you.

  16. #18
    csuzanne

    i agree, it does blow. but eventually you will see the light at the end of the tunnel, and it won’t be an on-coming train! i say this for myself as well as you, my “new way of eating for life” started on Monday, so i’m feeling your pain! stay strong, we can do this!

  17. #20
    Suzzi

    I with all of you. I am the same weight as Cathy. I have started a Zumba dance class.

    After being in this class – I had new respect for the Biggest Loser contestants. I would be the first one out! Not because of complaining, but it is hard.

    I can’t get out of it (It is the same time as my dd dance class – so this keeps me from skipping.) Ours is $5 a class/hr. I love it. Because I am dancing – it is hard! Believe me and I want to die most of the time becuase I look like my mom and can’t stand looking in the mirror and of course the biggest in my class.

    I am going to look up that book suggested in opening post.

    Knowing that I am Not the only one hating exercising makes me not feel so alone.

    My main problem for me is to remember to eat, (I DO love food, but always forget and don’t eat until close to bed time.) I’m sure that would help if I started there, but old habits are really hard to break!

  18. #21
    sue Treiber

    I want to be one of those people for whom exercising is invigorating and relaxing and a rush. Instead, I am one of those people who’s doctor tells them they are pre-diabetic during girl scout cookie season. Bitenuker!

  19. #22
    Sharon

    I know NOTHING about WW. I do know that my PCP and my heart doctor both say if you are going on a lifestyle diet (and you know it has to be a lifestyle), the best one is South Beach. I’ve lost 14 lbs this year so far with little or no exercise. As PW says, “I’m just sayin'”

  20. #24
    Alis in Wnderlnd

    Cathy, I am right there with ya!!! I lost 10, then 12, now I am back to 9 and hovering. I just can’t seem to muster more, except when I got a stomach bug I lost 5 overnight, only to gain it right back as soon as I could drink water again. Damn.

    So I am back to air popped popcorn, wasa bread sandwiches, carrots (no yummy dill dip), and well, anything else I can find low in points. Blah….Sucks.

  21. #25
    Jennifer M.

    I know exactly how you feel. Just last week I started using the app Lose It on my iTouch, which helps you keep count of your caloric in take each day. It’s nice because you can also add in any exercising you do, and it tells you how many calories it burns. The first few days were tough, but I’m starting to feel much better about it.

    If you have an iTouch, look for this app. It’s free and it’s remarkably helpful.

  22. #26
    amanda

    I think the hardest part about dieting for me is that I really don’t “eat” crazy. I am on WW and this is my third rodeo. Always, the same. It takes forever just to lose a stinkin’ pound. I love exercise but for the scale to budge I have to seriously make a big impact. I mean run for at least 40 minutes and Shred. If I only had to give up “cokes” and desserts, and lose weight miraculously don’t you know I have already done that? I don’t drink soda hardley ever, and I don’t gorge on crap food. I have to make 23 points a day plus exercise to see anything happen for me. And then I still ride that very fine line between getting in enough calories and accidently making my fat hold on for dear life because I am exercising too much. Go fricken’ figure. Dieting sucks. I am at a weight that most women would be happy with. I fit into all of the said healthy ranges. Will I be college skinny again? No. But I don’t want to wake up 50 pounds overweight either. It just sucks there is no way to get around it. So glad you speak so honestly about it though! Cheers.

  23. #28
    Rhona

    I know exactly where you’re coming from – I have lost about 8 pounds in I don’t know how long – I’m just hoping they don’t find me again as well!! We’ll battle on with this one together! Good luck and enjoy your wallowing time ;P

  24. #29
    Karen G

    Cathy, Check out the book Mindless Easting: Why We Eat More Than We Think by Brain Wansink, PH.D. I think you will enjoy it. It is fun and light with many studies to show how we all eat so much more than we think we do and if we change some of those eating cues, we can eat less without even knowing it. I hate diets and exercise too especially since it is so hard to go outside in this unending winter we are having in ND. Good luck. Congrats on the 5.
    Karen G

  25. #30
    MaryC

    Cathy, I feel you, girl! I have never had a weight problem. I could eat whatever I wanted and not gain an ounce. Then I had a hysterectomy. THEN I had to have a piece of bone removed from my left leg. I had to sit on my a** for four months. Combine the doing NOTHING with the hormone thing and well, let’s just say I don’t love the little wiggle in my walk.
    I only NEED to lose about 8 pounds. I could stand to lose 5 or so more but my GOSH! I feel like I am starving all the time. And then there’s those Girl Scout cookies in the pantry and they call to me…
    And the exercise thing, it hurts me to do too much because of my leg. That and the sweat are a big turn-off.
    I will wallow with you. It’s the neighborly thing to do.

  26. #31
    Loydene

    Ahhh, Cathy. Dieting does blow. Completely. As does exercise. But…. sorry, dear …. feeling sorry for yourself also blows and doesn’t help remove the “chub”.
    I have WAY more to lose than you. And I love CAKE — my life has been spent in the search for the perfect CAKE. And I loathe exercise — my idea of exercise is turning the page while hold a hard back book.
    But .. I also loathe being unable to hurry across a street against the traffic (which is why you have to hurry!); knees that hurt; the inability to return a stock pot to the bottom cabinet AND get back up; being embarrassed and ashamed of pictures taken of me with my son.
    So … we have to choose healthy. It really isn’t a temporary change or quick fix. It is a choice for a lifetime of health. (Blah, blah, blah.) (Oops — sorry — my “evil twin” just popped out …. as has yours in this blog post!) I struggle with the choice everyday because “choosing healthy” isn’t inherent. I’ve been trying to choose healthy for 16 months now … I’ve lost 44 pounds … doesn’t seem like *that* much for *that* long — but it is 44 pounds that are GONE. I go to step class 3 times per week, I lift weights with a female Russian weight lifter (image Russian accent and say: “Girls with nice ass and back lift heavy weights”) and with my son — who tells me he is proud of me and how well I’m doing.
    I still hate it. I despise every step and every freaking lift. I still love CAKE! But .. I’m kinda’ proud of me, too!

  27. #33
    Lisa Howard

    My own personal sob story…6 months of 5:30 am wake up calls to torture my body with hard-core, brutal work outs…24 Mondays of renewed resolve to eat even better than the week before…180 days of mental math to ensure accurate calorie restriction…194,400 minutes of creatively manuevering my body to avoid the agonizing soreness. What did I get for my efforts? Not one. Single. Solitary pound lost! NOT ONE!!! I CAN actually feel muscles beneath the layers of fat. But what they tell you about muscle burning fat…LIES! It’s all lies!

  28. #35
    Sarah B

    No advice from me, just an agreement. Dieting sucks. I’m doing WW too, have had success there before, but this time it’s much harder. I miss food. Last week I ate out at a bakery, had the fruit salad instead of all the yummy things I really wanted, and on weigh in day, I GAINED a pound. How can that not suck? I just have to tell myself it’s going to be worth it in the end, because I know it will. Hang in there.

  29. #36
    Fatima

    No doubt about it – dieting absolutely sucks. To walk around day after day and think about your weight is stupid. But I profess, that commercial with the scale attached to their ankles – totally me. i’ve been going to the gym off and on for about 2 years, other than feeling a whole lot more invigorated in the morning, I still haven’t benefitted on the scale if you know what I mean. Work in progress for the rest of my life I say. And whatever will be will be …
    However, you are one step way ahead of me, I haven’t been able to quit smoking yet. Go Cathy… Love the honesty on your blog.

  30. #37
    sarahs

    Okay..now that I am “signed in” Cathy! I cannot tell you how much I enjoy your blog and how much it inspires me..I have taken technology leaps because of you! I am a facebooker…! I admire your honesty about your life and creativity beyond measure! This endless midwest winter makes us all want to live in a potato chip bag..but soon it will be spring and there will be some fresh yummies like peas, and strawberries. I dedicated the new year to reclaiming my pre return to college 39 year old self…somehow 2 years of stress full nursing studies packed on a bit of extra “chub” Points help my brain tell my stomach NO..and thank goodness for FF popcorn..the other thing that helped this 43 year old was some wicked WICKED hotflashes…OMG…mine burn calories! (the only postive spin to thier discomfort) Either that, or my new career as an RN (yes, at 43 and with 3 kids!). Both beat eating celery – which to me is the epitome of diet food and I hate it…as dieting! A Dilly Bar is the best 5 points ever! Good luck..spring is on the way?!

  31. #38
    Vicky

    I love your honesty. Dieting does blow. Just remember why you’re doing it. You’re doing for a healthier you and for your family. Keep the prize in sight. It will get easier, I promise.

  32. #39
    Katie Scott

    I just got the Wii Fit and after it did all of the calibrations, it made my Mii shorter and fatter. Grrrr. Now I’m on a mission to get my Mii looking cuter.

  33. #40
    pam

    Perhaps the exercise is creating muscle and everyone know that muscle weighs more than fat, so you’re actually losing fat and gaining muscle. Are you clothes feeling looser?

  34. #42
    Jennifer

    Hang in there! You have the guts to put your story out there for all of us to see. Know that we support you. There are many of us who are right there with you. I have a lot of weight to lose.

    I started power pump classes and body sculpting classes. The chub is going away, the close fit better (I dropped one size) and I have muscles where I didn’t know I had muscles before…however I have only lost about 10 lbs in 7 months. But I am not discouraged, I feel better than ever, I have more energy and since I can see that my body can change, I have encouragement to get out there and change it. Weight loss shouldn’t be your only indicater. Start doing some toning excercises and I bet the chub runs away! (classes with other people will push you more…it is too easy to quit when the muscles get fatigued at home)

    I had to see a change before I felt invested in the change. (I hope that made sense)

    Good Luck!

  35. #43
    Lynette S.

    I like to eat. (especially Reeses and Potato chips) I hate to exercise. I weigh too much but trying to loose it sounds exhausting. I do what I can, when I can and I am trying to make peace with my shape. I know so many people who aren’t beautiful in the “People magazine eyes of the world” that I love and what it comes down to is they are so beautiful on the inside, the outside isn’t important.

    Anyway that’s my two bits. You have succeeded in encouraging me though. That’s worth something.

  36. #44
    TracyBzz

    Sigh…..I like food too. I’m down a total of 8 lbs since mid January. I know losing a little is always better than gaining, but still, only 8!? Slowly but surely just keep plugging away.
    I once heard that food addiction is so hard to beat because you still need food to live. But you don’t need to smoke, drink or do drugs….these things can be avoided 100%. But you’ll always have to eat, just more healthy than you would like too.

  37. #45
    tammy b

    i feel your pain my sista! my nemisis the treadmill, mocks me openly on a 5x a week basis….and i say mocks because while i saddle up and ride the beast, even running in intervals, i got nothing. no firm. no loss. the desire is fading….

  38. #46
    Kellie

    Amen Sister! I have been going to start Body For Life (again) all week, yet I have only managed to not find my book and eat everything in sight. Why is something you want so bad, so hard to do?

  39. #47
    Heather Main

    Cathy I feel your pain: (I frickin hate exercise I currently am using the excuse that being in school full time leaves no time for exercise but I could probabyl squeeze it in.
    I am down 30 pounds since the last Inspired I was aiming for 40 but this will do.
    If it makes you feel better I think you’re gorgeous just the way you are and when I did meet you in person I did not see any chub.
    Heather

  40. #48
    Randi

    *big hug*
    There should be a facebook group for DIETING BLOWS!
    As a RN, I will tell you that the cardio you do down there in your “bomb shelter” does your heart good, your lungs good, your bones good, your brain good. All important things. Don’t “they” always says it starts from the inside? lol
    This coming from someone who started Dr Cohen’s diet a week ago and is weighing stupid vegetables to make sure I get EXACTLY 105 grams worth. oy. (for morbidly obese only)

    I love coming every morning to your blog with my coffee; which I often choke or snort on as I read your post. It’s a great way to start the day.

    keep smiling!

  41. #49
    Bridgette

    More unsolicited advice (ha!):

    Yoga, my friend. And not just sit and meditate cuz’ that does virtually nothing for your behind except put it to sleep. I’m talking about vinyasa flow in at least an 85 degree room. Sweat it out. But don’t check out after the first class. You’ll be sore fo’ shizzle, but going back the next day will stretch out the toxins, and you’ll become sooooo addicted. And seriously, the pounds will melt off. And you will be able to eat your fave foods. I wish you lived in Cleveland because this is the best yoga place ever (www.clevelandyoga.com). Maybe there is one similar to this in MN? Check out my blog entry here http://crowswill.blogspot.com/2009/01/friday-nights-not-really.html

  42. #50
    Tammy

    I have been reading “Making the Connection” by Oprah Winfrey and Bob Greene. Some of the later written books might be better, but I like the simplicity of this one. I have been getting out and walking with two kids in a jogging stroller nearly every day and working to eat better. I feel better even though I am not sure where my number falls (the scale needs new batteries before I can find out). You inspired me when you started and I am hanging in there with you.

  43. #51
    Angela Lenssen

    Soooo what I needed this am. When we have to end this pity party, call me and we’ll take a walk together. For now, I’m going to just keep listing my excuses…

  44. #52
    MilenaRae

    I love that you’re so honest and you put it all out there for the whole world to see. If it’s any consolation, there are many of us in the same boat and it’s just nice to know we’re not alone. Dieting sucks. Food is crack. And exercise feels like its time that could be spent doing something much more exciting. HOWEVER, eating right and exercising are the key to improved health so we must do it. For ourselves, for our children and for our families. Keep up the good work. You’re down five, right? I think that’s awesome!!!

  45. #53
    Shawna

    Food = crack. I love to eat. Even when I am not hungry, I can always eat. When I am hungry, nothing is going to get done until I am not hungry. I make more sex noises while eating than in my bedroom. Especially while eating avocados. mmmmmm….. oh, that’s sooo good…. gimme more…

  46. #54
    Dana N (MissD)

    This is how I see it…You love food. Your weight is not negatively impacting your health. You quit smoking. You have a wonderful husband and children. You are so very talented. You have friends around the world. You have thousands of people that read your blog. You are lucky. Focus on the good. If losing a few pounds makes you this unhappy, is it really worth it?

    It’s all about perspective. Maybe if you stop worrying about your weight, eat the foods you love (in moderation), and just relax, everything will fall into place.

    Good luck Cathy. We’re all here cheering for you. We’ve all been in the same spot you are.

    The bottom line – just enjoy life, it’s too precious and too short.

  47. #55
    katie

    Cathy,
    I’m currently working on the chub too. What I’ve found about the exercise? It sucks for 30 minutes, but to be really honest, its gets pretty good when you go for 45-60. Something about the duration of having your body -well- endure for a bit longer and you get the endorphin releasing pleasure of having had a real work out.

    Sounds backwards, you hate something so do it longer. But in my humble experience it really really works. Give your work outs 45 minutes each for two solid weeks. You’ll be happy you did.

    good luck

  48. #57
    Karen

    I so totally agree with you on the eating and exercise stuff. I don’t enjoy exercise for exercise’s sake. I hate having to do something just because it’s good for me. And I like food too. I try to eat mostly good stuff, but it’s so HARD! And as I get older (I’m 46) it’s getting harder to lose the weight. I don’t have any words of wisdom for you. Everything you said rang oh so true to me too.

  49. #58
    Leslie

    I so understand. I have been going to a bootcamp five days a week for the last 7 months. I ended up gaining 15lbs! Yikes, but I can do 32 military pushups in a minute and 42 situps in a minute. This go around I’m trying to lose the weight. I talked to my dr and he tested me for vit D. I’m so deficient that I need 8000 units a week. Normal is 2800. He said that could be a contributing factor to not losing weight. We all need vitamins. Good luck. Thanks for sharing. I think most women feel like we are in the same boat.

  50. #59
    Audrey

    I am so with you sister. Hey – you’ve got me beat. Since the first of the year, while trying to lose 5 pounds, I’ve GAINED 5 pounds. Ha! So now I need to lose 10 pounds, and listen, it is not budging. I try to diet, I try to exercise, but nothing is happening. Usually I can lose it when I try, but not this time. So don’t feel alone, I just keep telling myself, when the weather gets warmer, I always lose weight. Maybe?

  51. #60
    Jennief

    Hey CZ, I’m with ya every step of the way.
    Hang in there, you can do it! I believe
    next month will be better:]

  52. #61
    Maria

    I just feel like I need to say a big “AMEN” after reading your post!
    I’m on the wagon too this year – and it is not my favorite ride. I miss all my old friends (chips, soda, chocolate, ice cream), and their “non fat” counterparts are yucky!! I just keep telling myself it will all be worth it in the end (there is an end to this right?)
    Thanks for your humor, it’s inspiring!!! πŸ™‚

  53. #62
    Barbi

    I am having a real hard time with consistency. I think it is about balance too, you have to live too! and sometimes that means a Coke with those fries! I also have food that I don’t eat on a regular basis that I love but I have learned to have some healthier stuff on hand. Yogurt covered raisins -nice and sweet. Dark chocolate- plain, with almonds, with mint. And on side note; since I have been eating only Dark chocolate the “other”stuff tastes TERRIBLE to me so I think your body/tastes can change too. But I also have found the getting older version of my body actually prefers to be exercising, and eating a good balanced healthy diet. My energy and mood are SO much better when I do this. So that is what I am trying to focus on. I will NEVER be in the before two babies body again and that is ok! I just want to have the energy and the good spirit to have fun and play with my little girls!

  54. #64
    Stacy

    Read the book French Women Don’t Get Fat by Mireille Guiliano. She lets you eat what you want (in moderately sized portions) AND she has does NOT use gym equipment. So far I’ve lost 6 pounds and I get to eat ice cream. That works for me! Here’s a link to the book on Amazon if you want to check it out. I have no affiliation whatsoever, but I really enjoyed her book! http://www.amazon.com/French-Women-Dont-Get-Fat/dp/0375710515/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1238604265&sr=1-1

  55. #65
    young c

    Aw, sorry it’s been so hard! Sounds like people have a lot of advice! My only recommendation would be to see a personal trainer about exercises that will be fun and help you target your goals. Good luck!

  56. #66
    Kelli

    I’m also back to using our Wii Fit, I too am shorter and fatter and want to hit the tv when it says “that’s obese”. Who needs that? My clothes tell me that every day too.
    I have fallen hard off the WW bandwagon, I love the program but not the company. I really think that that stupid 0 point soup is the secret to success. I just can’t bring myself to eat another mouthful anytime soon. Unless it was covered in cheese and had a warm butter roll with it.

  57. #67
    Kate

    I am right there with ya! I LIKE, no I LOVE to eat, and the only way I can really eat all the yummy Cadbury chocolate mini-eggs (mmm, have you tried those?) and salt n vinegar chips I want, is to exercise. I do even like running sometimes, so that’s not so bad, but it is really hard to find them time. So, yes, I feel your pain. Alas, I have no magic to fix it…

  58. #68
    Tena Sprenger

    I too bought the People Magazine with Valerie on the cover, wow! I felt great for her, but yes I did feel a little worse about myself. My son did make me feel a little better by saying that he wouldn’t want me to wear a bikini anyway so not to worry bout it! Ha. Anyway I also used to say I hated exercise and couldn’t understand why all my friends were flocking to the gym, I just didn’t get it, the only thing I ever really liked was my dance classes, which I have continued to do.. love tap dancing. The key is to find some type of exercise you actually like and then it stops being such a chore, and if you can do it with friends even better at least for me because it also becomes a social thing. My cousin finally lured me to the gym last year and got my to try spinning classes… mind you I hate riding bikes but I love this! I was hooked, going 2-3 times a week and it also led to other things I never thought I would do or like at the gym like weight training go figure. Keep plugging away, and thanks for your honest thoughts on this thing we all struggle with.

  59. #70
    Ami Pilon

    Cathy, I managed to loose 60lbs and keep it off by only dieting during the week. On Saturday and Sunday I can have what I want. Now all I do is limit my portion size and walk a mile each day. No more dieting. I was never able to stick with it full time but with weekends off I managed to get to where I have maintained for ten years. You will find your own way.

    PS I actually miss my walk on the days I don’t walk now.

  60. #71
    peg risley

    Hey Cathy! I am so with you and this weight issue!My sister is studying to be… I don’t remember, but told me that during the first 20 minutes of exercise, your bod is just burning carbs-not even touching fat! Its still freezing in Roch, Ny – soooo looking forward to warmer weather with my walking pal, Pam. Time does really fly by when you are gabbing with a friend!

    What ever happened to that pill you take and all food tastes bad???

  61. #72
    Jan Francis

    Cathy, first of all, I must tell how much I admire your scrapbooking! TONS!! You’re the best, in my opinion. Now about your diet…think about this. When you go on vacation you know the desination, the date of arrival and the route planned. A diet is no different. The desination is the number on the scale, the date of arrival is…duh, the route planned is the calories in and calories out. Now the hard part is continuing on the journey. You’ve just been delayed at the airport, so to speak, so get back on the next plane. Hang in there, Jan in Tucson PS a huge congratulations on being a NON smoker!!!

  62. #75
    amandagibson

    Dieting does blow. Take it from me – the constant dieter…..what really sucks is that most of us associate food with emotions. We like to feed our emotions. And when you gain weight, what’s the first thing you want to do? Eat! It really, really does suck. I feel ya.

  63. #76
    Sheilah

    Two thoughts: find a friend to exercise with – it makes me stick with it like nothing else. I will let down myself, but I won’t let down my friend. Go figure. Second: I just bought myself a little toy that takes a lot of the guesswork out of the “lose weight” equation. It is called the gowear fit, and can be found on the website of the same name. It is a pared down version of what they wear on Biggest Loser. Basically, it helps me track my caloric output, steps, and sleep, every day. It has been so eyeopening for me – I can really tell when I am slacking off, and when I am not. i got mine through amazon, where it was $30 cheaper than from the website, and came with three months of monitoring free. Can’t remember how I found out about it – probably Oprah or More magazine – but I am motivated by numbers, and this really holds me accountable. I don’t belong to a club, to save bucks, which helped me justify the cost (I love rationalizing). Anyway, might be of some use to someone.

  64. #77
    Julia Dunnit

    2 things strike me: maybe online WW is not helping anymore and you ‘need’ the ‘group’ thing.
    And/Or:
    I’ve spent the better part of 25 years trying to become someone I patently am not. And then a year of misery coming to terms with it. I’m rejuvinated; overweight but still bendy, and strangely happy with my decision. Am still careful tho’ – I need to stay bendy!!

  65. #79
    Nicole H

    For one day I’d like to live in a world where chocolate chip cookies were vegetables.

    Actually reading your posts about starting WW, spurred me to start. I’ve never tried an ‘organized’ diet – always just counted calories on my own. But alas, I am now over 30 and realizing that age and metabolism just don’t mix… So know this at least: you are helping others (namely, me) try to get my butt in gear. I had baby weight that I’d never gotten rid of. Well, my twins are 4 now… so when do I have to stop calling it baby weight? lol

    btw, I’m with you on the peanut butter cups thing. Maybe those should be veggies too…

  66. #80
    Holly

    Totally with ya…Dieting totally sucks. And it’s not fair, either. I eat a ton, gain a couple of pounds. I eat NOTHING and lose 1 pound. What the?!

  67. #81
    Sara R.

    Yup. Hear ya! I’ve 14 lbs since September…so I get how SUCKY it is. ARGH.

    Shall we indulge in a little pity fest? It’s nice to have company along this stinky journey…lol.

  68. #83
    Canay

    Sympathizing with you over here in sunny California. I gave up alcohol for Lent because I thought if I didn’t drink and just ate the same I would lose weight. WRONG!

    And could you explain why when I say I am going on a diet, my DH who weighs like 145 pounds is the one to lose weight? Is there any logic to the madness??

  69. #84
    Canay

    After reading about how dieting blows, the song Blowin in the Wind popped into my mind. I’ve changed the lyrics around a bit…

    How many diets must a woman go on
    Before she thinks she is thin?
    Yes, ‘n’ how many diets must a woman go on
    Before she can eat good again?
    Yes, ‘n’ how many times must a woman exercise
    Before she does it with a grin?
    The answer, my friend, is blowin in the wind,
    The answer is blowin in the wind…

  70. #86
    megan

    Maybe it would be more beneficial if you did different exercises. Your body is probably use to walking and it might not be doing much. Some girls and I have been using P90X 3-4 times after work and it’s a lot of fun. Well, as much fun as you can have when you’re working out. πŸ™‚

    Hang in there!

  71. #87
    Jane Swanson

    Yeah, I get this, totally, but I could never say it as eloquently as you do, my friend. Big sigh shared with you. My son is getting married in August and I’ve got to DO something! 30# would be oh, so nice.

  72. #88
    Rachel M.

    I hear ya, Cathy!!! I am self wallowing in it today as well! Good to hear I am not alone! Where is that dang magic potion??? I always think…my NEXT life I will have THAT body! πŸ˜›

  73. #89
    Karen

    Cathy, dieting DOES BLOW…but working out doesn’t have to. If you enjoy dancing, try Zumba if there’s a class in your area (check out zumba.com for instructors near you–it’ll tell you where they are teaching). I hate to dump this on you, but I will say that my dad left my mom in the fall after 35 years of marriage…it was a shitty time and I was buried in crap and felt like it. I went to a Zumba class and I caught myself smiling and laughing and when I realized it, I felt like a jackass because all of a sudden I had tears in my eyes–I didn’t even remember the last time I had genuinely laughed. Fast forward four months and I am addicted to zumba and 5 of my friends have recently joined my gym for…yes, you guessed it–ZUMBA! Now, not all of us can dance…and I am still laughing at myself on a regular basis, but it is fun and they tell us we’re burning 500-700 calories. The point is, I go and I have fun and I look forward to going again…and again. I’m even considering getting my Zumba certification next month because some people have talked me into teaching it! It really has been a great workout for me and even if it’s not something you’d be interested in–you should know that there is a workout out there for you…ya just need to find it! Join a gym and just try out all of their classes. I have found that going in to a class where there is good music and someone telling me what to do is a A LOT easier than passing the time on my elliptical in my dungeon πŸ™‚ Best of luck finding a workout you can enjoy!!

  74. #90
    Susan Schacht

    I’M WITH YOU SISTAH. I share the same feelings. And to be true to the stalker I am becoming, I swear we were separated at birth. My 10 year old just asked me “Mom, why do you always diet and never lose weight?” Wow. But, I too, like food. LOVE it. And I’ve lost the weight before and I know the drill. Veggies. Exercise. Mediation. Colon cleansing. Positive thinking. Align your spine with the stars. Face west when drinking cabbage flavored water while wearing organic cotton from Peru. I got it. I know.

    I stll like food. And I don’t think I ever WON’T like food. Oh well.

  75. #91
    Veronica

    It does suck….

    I can even picture myself enjoying a run, or a good walk, or even yoga….but that is as far as it has gone! I just visualize myself doing all these things .. and looking fabulous in a bathing suit….people turning their heads when I walk by…

    ….LOL!!! Only in my dreams!!

  76. #92
    Sherri P eh

    While reading this post, I was just finishing up a Love It size Strawberry Banana Rendezvous from Coldstone — totally fell off that diet wagon! I can so relate. For me, the first week or two is fine, then the number drops more slowly, and I find more reasons to cheat. Then it gets close to the end of the month and I tell myself I’ll start on the first of the NEXT month! Well, here it is April 1st, I just finished up a Love IT size Strawbery Banana Rendezvous. Ooops, I alreaedy mentioned that. Oh well, May 1st is only another 29 days away! Hang in there Cathy!

  77. #93
    Deb Rymer

    Cathy – refer to your previous post… Wonderful mother, amazing inspiration to so many…the number on the scale is not the measure of your worth. Hang in there, appreciate yourself, and it will all work out.

  78. #94
    Lori N

    I have your 5lbs.

    I know you don’t want them back, so I’ll just feed them and keep them happy until I can pass them onto the next person. Hopefully some small toddler who is ready for a growth sprut so the pounds can be put to good use instead of insulating my middle & hips.

  79. #95
    Ali W

    Hi cathy. I sent you an unsolicited email just a couple of days ago to tell you about the eating protocol I just did which has resulted in over 12 lbs being lost but most importantly the chub from my waist, hips and thighs has gone. SO too has Back Fat – that unsightly roll above my bra strap…. I followed the Dr Simeon’s HCG protocol and used homeopathic hcg. I was guided daily by Leslie Kenton who really kept me motivated. Take a look at it – I have been so impressed and today I went out and bought myself a pair of skinny skinny jeans in a size 4. I kid you not. At Christmas I was a size 8/10. http://www.lesliekentonhcg.com It seriously works, the weight stays off, and the super restrictive diet part is only for 3-6 weeks! Good luck. Ali

  80. #96
    Jan Connair

    The one time in my life I seriously dieted was in college. I was on the drill team (totally dating myself with that remark) and I knew we were getting these skimpy uniforms to wear. So I started counting calories, not eating anything at all, making myself sick, and frankly, I was darned close to anorexia! 5′ 8″ and 112 lbs., and I still thought I had “thunder thighs.” Idiotic!

    Now I just do what my dear, practical mother says she does. She has two rules: (1) everything in moderation, which means she eats a little of anything she really wants to eat, but doesn’t go overboard, and (2) push yourself away from the plate before you start feeling really full.

    That’s worked for me for 30 years, even though I’ve had 5 kids.

    And I’m pretty sucky at exercise, too!

    Good luck, Cathy. I know you’ll get there. Just don’t let yourself get too fussed about the pace of the weight loss.

  81. #97
    Patricia

    Cathy,
    So, about the time you were making your resolution, I made one too. On January 22, I gave up sweets, totally, and haven’t indulged since. I’ve lost 15 pounds, so it works, but here’s the deal. For me, it was called survival.
    I’ve had type 1 diabetes for 18 years and wear an insulin pump. When diagnosed, they thought it was type 2, so I dieted and exercised like crazy, hoping to control it that way. I got very skinny and then had to go on insulin. Since then I’ve gained weight steadily till I was 40 pounds overweight. On a pump you can eat and then give yourself insulin to cover it, so you put on weight. I’d never been able to lose since diagnosis, because when I tried to stick to a diet, I would have an insulin reaction.
    Last summer, I think I had an ulcer, so I gave up pop and coffee. Now, I never wanted to give up pop and coffee, but pain is a tremendous motivator and I did it.
    Now we come to January 22. It was my daughter’s 28th birthday and I am 56, twice her age. I realized if I didn’t do something different, I would not live to see her reach this age like my mother was able to do, so that morning, out of the blue, I gave up sweets. And, I told people, some of my students, my friends, my family, etc. Seriously, I love sweets, and I haven’t had any since and I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to have them again.
    After I lost some initial weight, it felt so good I also gave up seconds and make it a practice to eat more vegetables and fruits.
    I may start to eat a few sweets again, if I’m at goal for a while, but maybe not. I don’t ever want to get that size again. I really think I’m a compulsive overeater. I snack on nuts a lot (almonds particularly). And I may not make it to my goal, but I do feel better.
    The other thing I know is that anything we write won’t help, you just have to decide to do it for yourself, and it has to be a life change, not just a temporary diet.
    Good luck to all of us who struggle with this on-going challenge.

  82. #99
    Jacquelin G

    Oh I so hear you – I am down a big 3 lbs – I have gained and lost the same 10 lbs about 20 times in the last year. So frustrating and discouraging, but I am trying to hang in there in spite of everything – I hope you do, too!

  83. #100
    Heather H.

    Amen Sister! I am a recovering skinny girl who used to run. Then I had a baby. Got depressed and gained 20 pounds AFTER I had the baby! I am a firm believer that mother nature’s jokes ain’t funny! While lots of things are wonderful post baby (he’s almost 3!) my body isn’t one of them! Unlike skinny Kelly Ripa!

  84. #102
    AnnB

    I ate 3 pieces of bacon for supper. That’s all I’m saying. Use it to feel better about yourself, or perhaps (hopefully) to say “Yes, Ann, you get it my sister, I am not alone.” That’s all.

  85. #103
    o-girl

    Thanks for keeping it real! Dieting does BLOW and anyone who says it doesn’t and remains perky is LYING! πŸ˜‰ I know I need to rearrange my body mass but this depression thing is keepin’ me down, man. I wish I liked to run. I wish I liked taking walks. I wish I had a treadmill or elliptical so I didn’t have to go walking outside. I don’t want anyone to watch me. I don’t want to be the source of people’s stares, judgement & ridicule.

    I sound like a lot of fun, eh? πŸ˜‰ Just keepin’ it real. Thanks for your open & honest post.

    Big hugs to you. We’re all behind you, CZ.

  86. #104
    Jen Weisinger

    I am very overweight and worked out like a slave in the salt mines for the12 weeks before my wedding last summer. Seeing the scale drop five pounds when I felt like I’d float away to celery island was not fun. In fact, I was convinced it was futile. Then good old Aunt Flo came through and 12 weeks effort was for naught. I too am seriously sick of the chub and of feeling like a failure. But I watched a Biggest Loser ep I DVRed (sp?) and it changed my outlook. Yeah- the environment is not reproducable in my situation, but I was persuaded to believe that maybe it wasn’t as hopeless as I’d been telling myself. I I can make small changes and make time. I can move more and stretch (instead of eat) my tension and boredom away. At least for one day. Cause that show is way inspirational. Pics don’t lie. Any some of those contestants are way heavier than I. And they were pulling 2 ton cars with nothing more than a body harness!

  87. #105
    wende

    i don’t have any advice for you – just a free pass to let you whine, because sometimes, that’s what you really need. you’ll pull out of it and life will be good again.

    and i’m totally with you on the “diet blows” thing. all i can say to that is, “amen sister, A-MEN!” the bottom line is, i just don’t want to live in a world without ice cream and cheese, i just don’t! what’s the point of that?

    and thanks for throwing that edward cullen line in and giving me a little chuckle. of course, that’s what you’re best at! making chuckle that is.

    good luck!

  88. #106
    Susan

    AMEN, sister! I feel exactly as you do, especially in regards to the peanut butter cups (or eggs, or hearts or pumpkins or Christmas trees…) I digress. I would be a great slim person if I just didn’t love FOOD! Hang in there πŸ™‚

  89. #107
    Teresa

    Oh my friend Cathy…what to say except to not listen to comment #1, Not that I have anything against her but when you are dieting you do not want to hear that someone is down 43 and it gets easier. Listen to me… be extremely happy with down 5 pounds. I am up 5 pounds and I am with you dieting blows big time. There is no glory in it. And when you reach your goal guess what you need to maintain it….Then we start the club of maintaining blows!!! It is hard… keep it up…we are all secretly cheering you and our inner selfs on! And yes, like the nurse said in comment #48, it is good for your heart. Think of your heart.

  90. #108
    Sarah

    Try being pregnant! Today, went to the eye doctor with hubby and the doctor walks in – takes one look at me and says “Are you due any day now?”

    Thinking to self: REALLY? Any day? You think I look THAT BIG? Already? Heck, I’m in trouble if people think I am THAT BIG already!

    Reply politely: NO, not due til the end of May so, I have 2 months to go! (Insert complete look of surprise here, from doctor, who’s foot has been inserted into her mouth!)

    Truth: Baby should start gaining 1/2 pound per week now… I’m afraid that we’ve all seen nothing yet! And these things called breasts somehow manage to grow HUGE well before they are needed and well before they actually fill with milk and get EVEN BIGGER! My boobs have stretchmarks on them already! GIMME A BREAK, EH!

  91. #109
    christna

    aw sorry you feel bad but why don’t you just think of something else….. like scrapbooking!!! I really miss seeing your pages. PLEASE SHARE SOME SCRAP BOOKING WITH US PLEASE (I’m having withdrawal symptoms from your Design your Life class).

  92. #112
    Kelley

    I feel your pain, Cathy. I started WW about the same time you did..yes, the pounds are coming off, but when you have a week like I did last week (why, hello 3 lbs…I thought it took me 3 weeks to lose you and here you are again in 1 week..missed ya!)it does suck. I’m doing the tradmill too….because I detest excercising too.

    Here’s a quote for you that I heard a couple of days ago “I may not be where I want to be, but I’m sure as heck not where I was”-Naomi Judd (I say “hell” when chanting it softly to myself…heck doesn’t roll off this Mainers tounge)
    Good luck!!!

  93. #113
    lynne moore

    No diets in a perfect world. Cathy – find an exercise program that changes. When you are in Henderson next I’ll hook you up with my personal trainer friend who does a fun “bootcamp” outside at the park.
    Exercise: great excuse to get a big dog who needs to walk daily. (Your arms will exercise too holding on…) and my favorite. Or a good self-defense class: sweat with a real purpose. And a great class to take with your kids – especial Aiden. Although I have my (now) 6 foot son who trains with me….. Totally differnt with a giant child. but it is a whole new respect link between parent and child.

  94. #114
    Ann

    My neighbor always says to me, “you have 24 hours to have your pity party but then you are required to stand up, dust yourself off, and stare your problem in the eye.” 24 hours starts………. NOW!

  95. #115
    Tina

    So I am hating the way I look right now as well. HATE it. Hate that my kids are getting out of school for the summer in 8 weeks and I look like a tub, hate that my clothes don’t fit, hate that I HATE dieting so much. And exercise, blech. So, I am going to put my yummy cravings of ice cream and sonic coke aside and break out the jillina michaels dvd and wii game that I bought month ago and try to lose hat 20pounds they say I will lose…and then keep doing it until it’s all gone, because this year, I don’t want to be the fat mom coaching baseball.

  96. #116
    Sandy

    Hey, what’s with a “few days of wallowing”? You don’t seem like the wallowing type. Today’s a new day, just begin again. It’s not a race, nobody is keeping score, just DO IT! Five pounds is more than a bag of sugar these days…try carrying a bag of sugar around with you everywhere today and you’ll realize that losing 5 pounds is a great accomplishment. If you were to lose 5 lbs every three months for a year that would be 20lbs gone! You’re looking at it all wrong… turn it around and pat yourself on the back. If you hadn’t started WW you would probably be up another 5 lbs from where you started by this time.
    I bet if you twittered what you ate everytime you ate it, you would be more accountable to what you are actually eating! Just a thought! πŸ˜€

  97. #117
    tirzah

    Dieting definitely has its ups and downs, but I admire you’re tactic here. Address it, admit it, and be done with it. Sometimes just saying, “dang it, I want to eat some blasted potato chips out of the bag!” and “I’m sick of counting points” helps to get it out of your system and move on. Then I just remind myself that “I’ve come this far” (52 lbs lost doing WW and Curves since the kids went back to school in the fall) and “yes, it’s working” and “okay, I will track my foods” and I really do feel better about fighting the battle. More importantly, I feel better physically, I’m healthier, and I really do want to continue this hard journey. My mantra…”I can do hard things!” The other thing that has helped me a lot with what can be a very slow journey is thinking about it in cubes of butter. Sometimes when you only lose half a pound it can be discouraging (especially if you have a lot to lose), but I think of 2 cubes of butter off my rear or my abdomen and I say, “Hey, that’s alright…that’s not a bad weeks work!” Keep on keepin’ on.

  98. #118
    dm

    Cathy, right there with you, girl. Just about every day, I go downstairs to the treadmill and walk for 30 minutes. Don’t really enjoy it, just know that I have to do it. It doesn’t seem to make much difference in my weight, but I do it anyway. I guess I have FINALLY realized that exercise has to be a part of my life, for the rest of my life. And when you can wrap your head around that, and believe it, then it gets a little bit better. I am close to your age, and I like to blame it on our age too. There are a lot of hormonal things going on right now!

  99. #120
    Jenni Jones

    I hear you! I know what you are going thru. I know how desperate and disappointed you feel. I know how favorite food deprivation can cause you to snap the head of the person you love most and cry for no reason other than you dont know what else to do.
    I had cancer last year. It changed my views. I now embrace life. I embrace the skin I am in….lots to embrace :), and I try not to stress too much about the CHUB. I still walk most days, and I still try to steer away from “bad foods” but I dont stress over it. I am loosing weight ever so slowly, but I am also living my life to its fullest. I made myself promise.
    I am not saying to stop trying, we all have to try, but dont make it the main focus of your life. I love your blog and you are a beautiful person….just the way you are.
    I wish you luck and weight reduction, but most of all, I wish you happiness.
    Have a wonderful day!

  100. #121
    Terri

    Are you familiar with Pam Anderson of the book The Perfect Recipe? She lost a bunch of weight and wrote a book called The Perfect Recipe for Losing Weight & Eating Great. If you aren’t familiar with her, she is an amazing cookbook author and eats/cooks *real* food. This isn’t a diet but a way of life for those of us that love to cook and eat. I use her recipes all week long and actually created a menu plan with them. She recommends a tea-time snack (something I look forward to all day) and a little appetizer or wine before dinner. Her meals are fantastic, my very picky family loves them and honestly have changed my life. Instead of feeling like I’m depriving myself I feel excited, empowered and full of energy.
    Anyway, you might want to check it out.
    I would also stop eating the WW crappy food. Embrace real, seasonal food and you’ll need less to feel satisfied. Promise.

  101. #122
    Susan M.

    You know Costco is now selling those meal plans, like Valerie Bertinelli’s, for a really good price!

  102. #125
    Michele C.

    i absolutely love you. you are so real.

    p.s. don’t believe those who say dieting gets easier…they’re lying. ;o)

    m

  103. #126
    Michele C.

    oh…forgot to mention an organization/book called Hungry Girl. they have REAL solutions to food we all love. m

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