Tales from the Scale: The WTF (where’s the fries?) Edition

Cathy ZielskeCZ Life212 Comments


Did you know that if you want to look thinner in pictures, you need to be looking up?

Did you also know that despite the unbridled joy illustrated in the photo above (where indeed I am looking up) I'm really not feeling too hot about the scale this month?

Disclaimer: I am not in the best of moods as it relates to so-called Tales from the Scales. If you want sunshine and roses today, you may have to a) look up at the sky (so long as there is no cloud cover to obscure your view), and b) go buy yourself some flowers. Why? It ain't coming from me today. That, and I may use the word 'ass' in the following post. You have been warned.

Weight loss journeys are hard.

They are hard when you truly realize, "Ohhhh, this is how I have to eat FOREVER if I want to wear these smaller sized pants!"

I have had a lot of success since starting in January. A lot. Beaucoup, as the French might say. I'm not here today to downplay this in any way, but I do feel I need either a mental adjustment, or a full-on wake up call because sugar has been haunting my unstable ass since Halloween.

Side story: this past weekend, I ran into someone I hadn't seen in a while, and he said, "Wow. You're looking thin."

What is it about such a comment that'll make you stop everything you're doing/thinking/believing to reply, "What? Really? Awww. Nooo. Really? THANK YOU!"?

I inject this little story only to let you know I am aware that I've lost a lot of weight, and should be singing my own praises on a daily basis. I get this, in theory.

The part of me that doesn't get it in reality is the part that decided to stop doing Weight Watchers and just go to straight calorie counting. It's the part of me that is seeing the scale up for the second week in a row. It's the part of me that knows deep down that points and calories really don't measure up equally. It's the part of me that knows I'm on a dangerous precipice right now and not so far down below are the white sugar-sanded beaches. And the mini donuts. And the sex muffins. And the Lays. And the Sprite.

All waiting for me to fail.

No whining allowed

But I keep reminding myself that things are different this time. For one, I exercise. For two, I look forward to said exercise. I need to keep reminding myself that I don't have to follow the same pattern I've followed twice before, when I lost weight, only to gain it back and then some.

And even if I did, would that make me a bad person? Deep down, in my core?

What the hell is wrong with my female thinking when part of me says, "Well, not technically…but maybe just a little bit."?

Why does being lighter make me feel prettier, happier, more successful, more in control—more…you name it?

This is all coming in the wake of the Halloween sugar fest that I'm still not quite ready to kiss goodbye. It's all coming in the wake of a 4.4-pound shift in my weight over a 7-day period. It's all coming in the wake of the fear that I'm slipping up.

I share the good, the bad and the ugly on this trip. Not that I'm buttering you up for my imminent failure, but I get a lot of email from women like me who are finding inspiration through these Tales posts, and I just want to make sure I'm presenting a fair and balanced story.

Believe me, I'm no fitness guru. I will admit that when Oprah's weight goes back up, I always feel just a bit more connected to her. See! It IS hard. It's not just my imagination! That somehow, if she fails, it's okay for me to slip up too.

I'm no Oprah either, but I do shoulder the sense that I'm not just letting myself down if I backslide, but all of you who've come to read and comment and are working on your own journey.

Long story short: me, human. You, good blog reader.

Another month in the journey. I'm not as stable as I'd like to be.

But I sure as hell wake up every day trying.

Month 11


Want to join in? Or document your journey? Or whine along? Or celebrate successes? Both the template above and this one are available at Designer Digitals for those who want to track their progress along with me. There's a Flickr Group as well, to share your pages with others making similar changes.

SUPPLIES: Layered Template No. 38 (Cathy Zielske) • Krafty No. 7 Cardstock Pack (Katie Pertiet) • Aki Solids Paper Pack (Michelle Martin) • Avenir and Archer fonts

To read more on my journey of Eating Less and Moving More, all posts on fitness related issues can be found here.



Cathy ZielskeTales from the Scale: The WTF (where’s the fries?) Edition

212 Comments on “Tales from the Scale: The WTF (where’s the fries?) Edition”

  1. #1

    Good for you for sharing the iffy moments as well as the great ones – you’re right it isn’t just sunshine and roses, but wow, you’ve come a long way 🙂

    I completely empathise on what you say about the twisted thinking. I really wish I could think more ‘normally’ about food. Whatever normal is, anyway.

  2. #2
    Christa Paustenbaugh

    It is a terribly hard journey Cathy and good for you for sharing it: the good AND the bad. It’s physical, emotional and mental all wrapped up together in a not so cute bow!
    Despite the Halloween candy overload (I’m so in that right now too!), you are a healthier you now and that’s saying something!

  3. #4

    Whoa, hang on – Lays must mean something different in the US?! In the UK it means…. Um…… Well, interesting that you positioned the word next to ‘sex muffins’, shall we say?!

    And also – you do, totally, rock. Everyone’s allowed a wobble at times xx

  4. #5
    Kendra B

    This time of year is so hard! Not only does there seem to be an overabundance of food, but its all treats!!!!! Our office is CRAZY with food starting at Halloween and going thru January. And I’m on of those people who can’t eat just one, so I can relate to your sugar fest 🙂 Look at the pictures of how far you’ve come, maybe read some of the posts about how good you feel, and hang in there 🙂 You’re not letting anyone down, so try not to feel that way! Its all part of your journey and we appreciate your honesty.

  5. #6

    I have been feeling the same way about eating & losing weight. I really have to do this forever??? However, there’s no way that you gained 4.4 pounds of real weight – well, I mean unless you ingested an additional 12,000 calories – right? When I eat sugar & soda & crap, the scale swings. I think the sugar makes me hold more water or something. Hoping your week gets better – you are inspiring!

  6. #7

    Phew you’re like me ~ yay. I love your tales from the scales posts but was struggling to read them earlier this year when I was going up and you were going down. How did I get over the hump?

    Well I got tough with myself and went on a sugar fast because I knew if I was honest with myself I wouldn’t give it up for anything. I’d been fooling myself for a few weeks telling myself that I could excercise more and keep the sugar. not a chance.

    So yep absolutely no sugar (fresh fruit included) for two weeks. It was hell, but I kept going saying it’s only a small spec of time in my overall life.I bunkered down and avoided certain aisles in the grocery store, and met friends for walks instead of coffee or lunch.

    Afterwards I did go back to fresh fruit but the sugar craving had been tamed for a now (I know it will be back and as yet I haven’t got a magic strategy for dealing with it but I know now that I have to tackle it quickly otherwise it’s super hard.

    so since the fast I’ve been enjoying carrots and apples ~ sweet but good ~ always with something savoury. Also I’ve increased my excercise and made myself think of snacks as protein instead of sweat treats ~ I snack on cold chicken, fish or bean purees on rye.

    hope something in this triggers a spark and helps.

    Never forget it is perfectly ok to be you and enjoy day to day.

    Big Hug Hx

  7. #8
    Jennifer L

    My downfall is salty food. I’m finding it easier not to buy it or to only get it when I have a plan to share it. And as far as baking goes, I’m only making stuff when I know it’s going somewhere–to my meeting, to my husband’s work, etc.

    I know it sounds like I’m giving advice; I’m not. This is my lesson learned this week as my weight loss slowed down.

  8. #9

    You are AWESOME! Thank you for your honesty about the reality shock of FOR LIFE…that is scary stuff, but look in them mirror and see the results of said life – you are rock solid going into the season of holiday happiness and look like you feel as amazing as you look. Now to crack open my awaiting copy of RLAM and actually get off my evergrowing ass and simply do like Cathy and just move more and eat less! Thank you.

  9. #10

    Best advice I ever got – and this from a recovering anorexic: DON’T STEP ON THE SCALE. Now, I realize my issues were (and face it, will continue to be) feeling worthy or “happy” if that number is the right number. And, I realize, that losing excess weight involves a different approach, but whenever I slide into stepping on the scale to “chart my progress”, I backslide.

    I don’t need a scale to tell me that my clothes feel a little snugger or that my jeans are tighter around my waist or that my thighs are rubbing together more. And when that happens, because it does, I try to moderate. Denial of any food group leads to problems, at least for me. I just pull back on the sweets/treats for a few days or a week or so or I up my exercise routine to include extra sets or an extra mile or two on my run…

    Cathy, I know every person’s weight journey is unique to them, but you have done an incredible job of changing your lifestyle. The weight loss is a side bonus to the fact that you exercise and you consider your food options more than you ever did before.

    It’s like riding a bike. Once you learn, you don’t forget. You may wobble on the wheels, have to make a hard “jerk” to straighten the tires, but you still keep on riding. The bike may break down or start to rust, but it still rides if you get on it!

    Sorry, I’ll get off the soapbox and get my high school kid’s rump out of bed.
    You make me laugh my kiester off, Cathy (wow, wouldn’t that be awesome if we could laugh our asses away!).

  10. #11

    @Mel – Lays are a brand of chips (or crips, as you would call them, Belgium has the brand as well)…

    @Cathy – I’m sure it is hard, but there’s also a choice to make. You are living more healthily this year. Do you want to constantly diet, or do you just want a healthy lifestyle? I think there has to be a line somewhere when you diet. I just can’t justify denying myself some delicious things. Life’s too short to worry about your “weight”. You can worry about your health, but I think you’ve done very well with that.

    What’s a few pounds when you are active and exercising and you make sure to eat healthy and take it slow on the chocolate and chips?

    By the by, the end of the year are horrid months to watch your weight (especially in the US – Thanksgiving, Christmas, Halloween… so many festivities that usually mean a lot of food). Don’t feel too bad this last stretch. When you regard the whole year in January, you’ll see the amazing progress that all of us see in your before and after pictures.

  11. #12
    Nancy M

    Wow.. I don’t even know what to say other than what all the great posts above have said. You said it best, Cathy – you’re human… you take the good and the bad and hang on for the ride. My suggestion is to throw the Halloween candy out!

  12. #13
    judy in huntsville - al

    I’m off the halloween binge TODAY! and I can’t wait to get this sugar feeling out of my system – it tastes so good but makes me feel so very sluggish!

    And CZ – I fully remember the day in 8th grade when I realized if I wanted to be thin I’d have to watch what I ate FOR-EVER – and you know what? I didn’t —- so now I’m reaping the benefits [consequences?] of weight gain over the years…

    but with your inspiration I’m working on it anew –

  13. #14

    I hear you LOUD AND CLEAR. I do think it’s tougher now (trying to maintain, maybe lose another lb or 2) than when I started WW.

    Here are a few things we talked about in my meeting 2 weeks ago (post-Halloween). Up your protein. Aim for 5g fiber / 15g protein with each meal (Dr Oz, I believe, says this too – AND – I believe the whole increased protein thing is coming to WW when the plan changes at the end of the month) … ok … so more protein – and then more water.

    Then, on of the women in my meeting made a comment about telling her sister how she just “wanted to eat like normal people” … and her sister said … “60% of America is overweight, is that the normal you’re looking for?”. I try to repeat this to myself when I need a kick in the arse.

    You’re not alone here.

  14. #15

    shorter days + colder temperatures = hibernation
    hibernation mode + Halloween candy = Trouble

    It’s okay, Cathy. We all go through this. Even those of us who have exercised regularly for years… we slip up, and then we get back on track. It’s part of the ups and downs of being human. Hang in there, okay?

  15. #17

    I agree with Barb hibernation mode and the urge to put on fat to make it through a cold winter is STRONG! But I have read that if you are exercising outside in the cold you will burn more brown fat which is the fat that is heavily laid down in my butt and obviously not yours any longer.

    What you are doing is truly an inspiration, However, I have not started weight watchers officially anyway until my thesis is done because with that still in play -defend on the 18th – I cannot make a LONG TERM commitment to eat like that. I think your first sentence or two are probably what you and the rest of us struggle with the most. This is for life. Thanks! And have a hug and have a brighter day!

  16. #18

    I’ve been up and down with my weight since my teens (I’m 44, sistah) and have learned quite a bit about how to be healthy and fit. But logic and my food decisions part ways more often than they should. I’ve relied on programs like Weight Watchers to make food choices fairly black & white. But then I give those up and cross into the gray area, where I want to feel in control and eat “normally”. Right now, I am in the UP category of the up and down.

    I think what I’ve discovered for myself is that I will never be “normal”. I have to be vigilant about exercise and what I choose to put on my plate. It’s a process that has to last a lifetime. And sometimes that entitled 5yo inside me cries that it’s just not fair.

    Here’s to 50+ miles again this month and conquering Eating Season (Halloween to New Year’s Day.) You keep me inspired to continue.

  17. #20

    Find your happy place. Toss the scale. Stop counting. Eat balanced meals, limited crap (but some crap – hey, life has to be fun), and forget about it. I go by my clothes – if they fit well, I’m happy. If they’re tight, I cut back on things for a week or so.

    Personally (and you know I ain’t shy about it!), I think you’ve probably lost too much – beyond your body’s “happy place.” So now it will be a constant, daily battle to stay there. Worth it? Maybe…maybe not. It wasn’t for me – life is too short!

  18. #21

    You are awesome Cathy, thank you so much for being so honest with us, we are all human afterall. I have given in to the candy for the first time ever in my life, and now I’m stopping cold turkey. It is hard to do I feel your pain but I also see how awesome you are and all that your doing for yourself so please don’t beat yourself up too hard. This will be your first holiday season since going the healthy, exercise way and it will be tough but you can do it. I have tons of faith in you and just remember one day at a time. Tell your faimly to help you out too, we all need a good support system.

    Anyhow you look smokin hot as always in your photo, so your there Cathy and should be proud of all you’ve done. Thanks so much for what you do for us the good the bad and always honest.

  19. #22

    thank you for the honesty, cathy. for sharing the ups and downs of your journey. i love oprah, but i love you more!

    and… since you’ve started weight training, forget about the scale for a while. i have knee issues and cannot run, plus my doctor asked me to do more weight training before considering any kind of heavy cardio exercise. so far i’ve barely seen any difference in my own weight in… 3 months! actually gain weight in the first month. i was really upset and all, but now i’m starting to see some changes in my body. i even enjoy that little muscle pain that comes after the strength training.

  20. #23
    Cathy T

    Like my Weight Watcher leader said. You pick yourself up, you dust yourself off and you start over right where you are at that moment. No waiting for tomorrow, or I will start next Monday. Just know that you have made more improvements over this year than you had before and those are the things you remember and feel proud of and realize that you see where you are at, when before it could have been a complete bail on yourself and just say screw it. I failed! You have not failed because you are aware and recognize that you are human. Take care and give yourself a hug because you truly deserve it! Keep up the great posts I love to hear your about journey. It reminds me so much of mine. I have kept off 50 pounds now for 8 years! It is a change in your mind and you have already done it! Don’t give up now! The journey is worth the ride!

  21. #24
    Dorothy F

    Cathy, you are doing great. After a 90 lb loss, I have maintained my weight for 2 years. Is it easy? NEVER. It is a daily struggle but we get used to losing and think the world will end when we gain a pound. I feel it does two things – that chocolate at halloween keeps me from feeling deprived and the extra pounds snap me right back in to exercising harder and watching closer. Keep up the good work, you have the right attitude and that is most important. I have learned, at 65, to ignore the pressure from society to look good but to just be happy with myself and the weight I am. You do rock and are very special for sharing this with all your readers.

  22. #25

    Cathy, First of all, I think you gained muscle. You just started with weights this month, right? Do your skinny jeans still look fab? Do your clothes still fit? If the answer is yes, your OK. If they are a little tight, just scale back on the sex muffins. It kills me to look at the scale because it was the only way I could gage myself for a while. Once I lost the weight, ( about 27 pounds) I gave everything in my closet away that did not fit. I have been down the same road of losing, gaining, setting up an IV drip with ranch dressing in my vein, and downing it with “wine tasting”, all in the name of become more cultured. But, now when things start to get a little tight, I don’t have the option of going back. I don’t have any clothes! I know I need to eat a little more broccoli and cut back the vino. I need to eat less and move more. As much as you want to make it all or nothing, it isn’t. Enough of my rant. But, as somebody who swings back and forth with the exercise like one of those rides at the fairground, you know the one in the guise of a big viking ship that makes a big whooooooosh sound, I think you gained yourself some muscle. So, I will go run now in anticipation of my 1/2 marathon on the 21st. You still rock, and dude, you totally lost your muffin top! Awesome pictures!

  23. #26
    Heather D

    As you said in the post from a few years back, you don’t have the tools that you need RIGHT NOW. But you will have the tools AGAIN.
    Give yourself permission to slide up and down the scale 5 pounds during the holiday season. You’ve got 2 weeks till Turkey Coma day, so you’ve got two weeks to get yourself where you were. Ditto with between Thanksgiving and Christmas.
    This is a really hard part of the year to work on weight loss and changing how you think of food. This is the time of the year for super comfort food. Use this time to think about how food affects your emotions, so you can restock your toolbox, maybe even find some new tools, and get back on track in January.

  24. #27

    Melanie…”60% of America is overweight, is that the normal you’re looking for?”. LOVE THIS!

    Cathy, I have been following you too on this journey and I actually get jeleous of you because you are successfull and I am not at this weight loss thing. You move and exercise I do not. I have stayed on WW and continue to lose tiny bits and or gain over the last couple of weeks. But I am going to stick with it this time. I am going to stay at it until it finally sinks in!!!!!
    Realizing it is going to be a lifelong thing is a killer. It can put a damper on any party. I have a brother that was overweight as a kid and just before he got married almost 30 years ago he lost a huge amount of weight and he has kept it off all these years. How? He just made eating better “his” way of life.

  25. #30
    Tammy M.

    Thank you Cathy for keeping it real. I know on my journey I’ve been at 146.5 forever, then this week, you guessed it…I gained a pound. And yes probably too much cursed Halloween candy and tortilla chips…oh and there was the two dishes of ice cream that one night…as all things in life, we do well..we get a groove going…then BAM something crosses our path to kick us off course. But the thing that matters most is not what you’ve gained or whatever…what matters most is if you have what it takes to accept the setback AND THEN MOOVE FORWARD AGAIN!! This journey is not an easy one…no true journey ever is, but if it is truly worthwhile…you’ll keep plugging at it. Love ya Cathy!!

  26. #31

    Kendra, I remember when I worked in corporate america, especially after having Aidan, and I was trying then to drop that weight, and the FOOD people would bring in. Drove. Me. Crazy. Mostly because I had to fight every urge to devour it all. : ) I do think its a little easier being self employed. I just dont buy it. Unless I make it. ; )

  27. #32

    I know I need to go on a sugar fast. I do. Im not mentally ready to do it. Man, the idea of not even having an apple for a few weeks does make me nervous. I get this though. Totally.

  28. #35
    Tammy M.

    I just re-read my comment…please excuse the MOOVE mis-spelling…I truly meant no reference to a cow. Really…Honest. LOL!

  29. #36

    Good soap box. And theres part of me that knows this to be very true, about the scale, especially now. And the whole idea of self worth coming from a number.

    Thanks for your comment!

  30. #37

    Yes. I know that I just have to live through these months, keep moving, and when January rolls around, my one year anniversary on this journey, take stock then and say, Okay… next phase!

  31. #40

    I’d have to go back and read your post again, ’cause I’m not sure what you said, but I actually laughed out loud!! Which, of course, you have a habit of doing by your honesty in sharing. I am over 50 and have struggled with said similar journey with weight and exercise and sugar. Before 45 I made a goal to be 45 and fabulous and got down to 125. Granted, I am 5’2″ and that is supposedly my ideal weight. Now I am over 50 and I consider myself still fabulous, but I have not been able to keep the 125 goal. Was it unrealisic? I did feel great, but I have the same issues with sugar and all those foods that a diet says you have to give up. I don’t know if I can live like that the rest of my life. Plus I believe in moderation and enjoying life. So, I have added some of those fun things back to my diet. I am now over 130 lbs., closer to 135. I run 3 days a week and spin 2 days and lift weights 2 days. This is where I’m at. Will I ever get back to 130? Perhaps. My main goal is to eat as healthy as possible, exercise and enjoy life and to me, that means wine, chocolate and coffee are in my diet. Kudos to all you’ve done so far! Thanks for sharing your journey.

  32. #44

    You are an amazing, talented, beautiful woman, no matter if you wear a size 8 or 18. That is the core of who you really are. All that amazingness and talent and beauty aren’t going anywhere ~ but I fear that when you lose sight of the beauty part because it is hiding behind a couple of pounds of unwanted “extra,” you lose sight of that.

    This is going to sound really, really corny, I know, but I say it with all the love and compassion I have. Love who you are. Right now. In the body you have today. Love that it allows you to enjoy exercise. Love that it provides you with a way to move through this world that is unencumbered by limitations. Love that it houses such an incredible, vulnerable, loving, generous, beautiful person.

    In the wise words of Patti Digh (author and all around genius on the human condition, IMO), “You are not broken. You do not need to be fixed.”

    Remember your original intention: Wellness & Health.
    You’ve achieved that. You are still achieving it; mastering it. It’s not going to always be a straight-line road to the peak. Sometimes there will be little detours. Stand where you are and appreciate the view FROM WHERE YOU ARE.

    Then, when you are ready, re-decide. Determine what you want, and live like that person. Start in baby steps. Teeny tiny baby steps. Look at it as an experiment in what works best for you; not as a failure of epic proportions. Keep experimenting. Keep it playful. I think you will feel a world of difference that may make the difference between staying on your path of wellness, or not.

    OK. Lecture over. Big virtual hugs are being sent your way. And I am now off to go follow my own advice. We got your back. Keep your face to the sun.

  33. #45

    I so agree with you on the whole, “I have to eat like this for the rest of my life?” thing. I don’t have a problem with eating healthy, but those fries, cakes and pies are forever calling my name. It’s like, “Hi, my name is Allison, and I am addicted to JUNK. It’s been about 12 hours since I last ate a sweet tart.” If I could just get it out of my head that that stuff tastes so dang good, all would be good with my weight. You are doing the right thing by sharing all of this, it’s a good thing. You are also doing the right thing by making mostly healthy choices, and exercising. Keep it up, and try not to be so hard on yourself for being HUMAN. 🙂

  34. #50
    Sara Mangan

    To actually GAIN 4 lbs of fat you would of had to eaten 14,000 extra calories in one week. So unless you were attacking the neighbor kids and stealing their candy some of your gain is muscle. Right?

    This sounds dumb but when you get in a funk like this, just fill your head your success. Remind yourself over and over again how much you have lost. Focus on those numbers instead of what the scale is telling you now.

    I know it’s such a mind game and I know how hard it is.
    You are doing awesome!!! Don’t sell yourself short.

  35. #51

    yeah, it IS about lifestyle. But you have to recommit on a daily basis. I can do this. Some days, its just more challenging, you know? : )

  36. #54

    Marcia, yes… i have to realize that Im not going to waste away to be a tiny little thing and enjoy life. I need to be healthy, strong and fit. I keep plugging away!

  37. #57

    I’m right there with you. I have lost about 70 lbs and pretty much maintained over the summer & early fall because we were in the process of moving. I still want to lose about 15 lbs and I was back on track to actually losing and then something happened for about 2 weeks where my heart just wasn’t into it. What I take comfort in is that I can get back on track & I have. I don’t have the mentality anymore that if I mess up with my eating, it’s over & I may as well just continue to do so. Plus, like you, I haven’t stopped exercising. You’re doing great and I think-this is life…we’re going to have ups & downs with our eating/exercise but as long as we get back to it, that’s what matters.

  38. #58
    Julia Spencer

    To be honest… I was starting to not like reading your posts at all. I was thinking “She lose weight really easily and is just one of those people…” You know the people who start a diet, stick to it, and don’t have any downs in the process. No falling off the wagon to eat 8 sex muffins in a day or needing to throw away the Halloween candy, but still eating it. Yeah… I fail way more on my weight loss journey than see success, so sure, yeah it’s motivating to read about success, but it’s also not real to me when all I read is success. I feel that there is something inherently wrong with me. – Thanks for sharing your down. I don’t feel so bad about my downs now. 🙂 I do hope you start to go up though. I really do, I don’t want to see you fail. It’s just nice to know that you are human. 🙂

  39. #59
    janis m

    Cathy, Cathy, Cathy, your mind is your most necessary “tool” on this journey. Don’t let it run wild, playing those old crappy tapes of negativity… you have so much to celebrate and be happy for regarding your successes on this journey. Please focus on the fact that you still lost inches this month and if you can still fit into those lucky jeans, then this month is a win. The scale does not dictate success; how your body feels & how your clothes fit says it all. Weight training will definetly put weight on you, but good weight! I am in the same exact place of looking at the scale showing I am 3-4 pounds up from where I think I should be, yet the fit of my clothes is saying “don’t sweat it”.
    You are going to laugh, but you mentioned the 30 day shred DVD a long time ago and I have been doing it since May and it really does work (along with the eating part, of course). I just don;t have time in my day for much more than that so it is a Godsend. I never thanked you for that little nugget, so thank you, my dear! And thank you for being an inspiration to us all!! 🙂

  40. #60

    Thanks for being so honest!!! I will tell you the way my husband tells me. . . if its BS I like it and it does make me handle the ups and downs a littler better (just fyi my husband is a personal trainer) Sometimes when you start to become as active as you have you will not see weight loss or maintain a certain weight. You will gain muscle and that will equal a bigger number on the scale. Maybe start focusing on your measurements and not the scales.

    No matter what you are a true inspiration and I refer to your blog when I get frustrated or when I have had just to many salads and need a reminder that it is worth it.

  41. #61

    thanks for sharing, your post came in the right day for me. I just found 4 lost pounds in the scale, I mean, they are back to my hips LOL I decided to lose them again this week and I started today. there are candies waiting for me in the kitchen but they will have to wait even more. At least until the 4 pounds are gone again, hopefully soon.

  42. #62

    I totally appreciate that you’re sharing the not so great as well as your success. I think this truly is a hard journey and a real mind shift as far as the forever goes! I too went back to WW in July and am down 43lbs with more than that to go still, but there are good days and bad! Think I might go look at that template though as I just put together 2 pictures of then and now and it’s amazing the difference, so I’m trying to focus on that! Here’s to more good days than bad and remembering how we felt at that higher weight so that we don’t put it on again… Cheers!

  43. #63

    Hi Cathy! I have so been where you are. Hate it. It’s a crummy place, but somehow I always come out of it because I want to reach my goal of healthy living. I want to be one of THOSE people. You will snap out of it too. You have come too far; worked too hard; you are feeling too good!!!

    I have lost 25 pounds in the last year (not without some periods of up and down) and was starting to get hung up on those last 5 pounds. This messed me up. I realized it wasn’t about the number on the scale, but rather the dress size I wanted and the shape I wanted. I went back to what I knew worked for me – strength training. I am 43. Strength training is where it is at in my humble opinion. I have stopped looking at the number on the sacle, because it is not moving, but I am down a dress size and I am getting awesome muscles and definiton. Love it! There is nothing like a strong body. That strength transcends into every part of your life! I am doing a high protein diet – 3 meals, 2 snacks. It’s not bad. Everytime I am hungry it is time to eat. I started working with a personal trainer twice a week and she says it’s not so much how much you eat (within reason), but what you eat. Strength training and a high protein diet work great together. The number on the scale might even go up, but it is because I am gaining muscle. I don’t let it get to me.

    My new goal is to drop body fat (not just weight) and gain lean muscle. It has really helped me reframe my goal in this way. Lots of times when we just lose weight we are losing muscle and we don’t want that. The workouts with my trainer are hard. I lift some heavy weights, but it so pays off and makes me feel like a bad ass! I am by no means bulking up, which many women fear. We don’t have the testerone to do that.

    I think you have reached a good place with your weight and now might consider working on muscle toning for results. Don’t let the scale define your success!

    You are doing great. Don’t worry. You’ll find your way back on the path. I know it!

  44. #64

    Have you watched “The Devil Wears Prada”? There’s a line in there where Meryl Streep’s assistant says “I’m one stomach flu away from my ideal weight.” So here’s my idea. Go visit a daycare. Those places are cess pools of filth and bacteria. Hug the kids (AKA vectors of disease)and cross your fingers that you pick something up!

    I’m kidding of course – just hoped to make you laugh as you make me laugh on an almost daily basis! I’m there with you – a couple days ago when I tried to turn down a pizza sample in the supermarket the lady insisted saying “Oh come on – you’re eating for two”. Nice. I DID have a baby 7 months ago but still not nice to hear. Boo supermarket lady, boo. 🙂

  45. #65
    Lori McKee

    Cathy, I am sure it is heartbreaking to see that number on the scale inch up ever so slightly. I am in the process of trying to lose the “baby” weight and love the compliments when others notice my efforts-especially my husband! My only advice to you is “look at that amazing transformation in the photos from January to today.” You look HOT, sister!
    Always inspired,

  46. #66

    OK, so, I hate to be all “you should read about this on my blog” because it sounds self-serving, but I’m just going to do it just this once just because then i don’t have to rewrite all my thoughts in a comment, but maybe if you have time you might read this on my blog:


    I think when it comes right down to it, what’s really, really hard is loving ourselves anyway. And to not see some weight gain as a FAIL. It happens, even to Oprah. more important to me (because I don’t think celebrities lives are anything really like mine) is that it happens to everyone. Why can’t we like ourselves anyway? Why is thin the only acceptable litmus?

    I think you are awesome & amazing & wonderful and I even thought that BEFORE you lost the weight!

  47. #67
    Heather B

    I think falling off the diet wagon isn’t NEARLY as detrimental as falling off of the exercise wagon. As long as you keep exercising you will NOT gain it all back. You may gain some & find a new balanced weight but for me, exercising consistently is the key. I’ve been eating really good for 6 weeks & have only lost weight the weeks I exercised every day.

    Keep it up – you are still my inspiration – every day I see your exercise tweets! 🙂


  48. #68

    let’s talk about how muscle weighs more than fat, and that you look rocking. I understand where you’re coming from–and wish it weren’t that way, honestly–but realize it’s so more much than about the scale. You’ve changed your life, friend, and that is worth 4 pounds this month. Seriously. Now just slowly back away from the Halloween candy. xo.

  49. #69

    I’m with everyone else…we LOVE you and appreciate you’re telling it like it is…as it’s happening. I’ve never done WW or any other diets only because I’ve always believed you shouldn’t deny yourself food – just have to make conscious choices. Want that second piece of cheesecake? Ok but remember no dessert for the rest of the week or you’ll have to add a little more actitity in your days. Most of us also fall into the it’s getting colder + comfort foot + hibernation + less activity = easy to pack on a few (or more) pounds. But, and I hesitate to bring this up, what about peri-menopause for those of us in our mid-upper 40’s. The mind and the body are definitely not in sync these days. One day, full of energy and saying no to certain foods (SWEETS!!!!) is easy. And yet just a few short hours later (the next morning)…exactly the opposite. And then there’s SAD (the winter blues). Wow, so much to have to handle…it’s no wonder so many women stress at this time of year. And I’m so looking forward to the Thanksgiving dinner…..just my two cents.

  50. #70

    You haven’t commented on the last few comments – so you must be out on your run – yahoo. Eating all the crap has a double edge sword – you gain weight -which face it – is part of the 4lb gain AND you physically feel like garbage – which is why you are in a self-loathing mood. I think you are on top of it now though. Sugar is evil. Apparently a breeding ground for cancer cells. Even knowing that is hard to stop eating it. Should we all take a pact and lay off of it for 2 weeks??? OMG – could we do it? I dare you. If you do it – I will too! (Because I feel like crap too – too many peanut M&Ms & the peanut protein doesn’t count 🙂 OK – I’ll stop rambling …. RQ

  51. #71

    Cathy — I’m right there with you. After losing 30 pounds, I took my anniversary weekend off from WW because I “deserved it.” Two months later, I guess I’m still of the mindset that I “deserve it,” because I’ve completely gone off the bandwagon. I’m maintaining that loss, but maintenance isn’t my goal. 90 more pounds is my goal. I too realized that OMG, I’ll have to eat like this forever to continue to lose. I need to find my mojo again. So thanks again for sharing your story. You look amazing, no matter what your brain is telling you.

  52. #72

    Cathy – you look great! I’m on my 11th week of a new healthy lifestyle journey, blogging on Fridays about it. However, it was SIX weeks before my scale ever moved at all and now it is moving very slowly. BUT I feel great, my clothes fit better, and I know what I’m doing is for the long haul. Thanks so much for sharing your ups AND downs!

  53. #73

    Cathy, I dont have the answer. I was on WW and lost 70 lbs in an 8 month period. I still had 15 lbs to go to reach my goal. Just before the holidays, everyone I came across told me how great I looked. Some even said how I may have lost too much. I heard it so much that I said to my self: “Hey, I’ve got this WW thing down packed and maybe I don’t need to lose anymore. I’m good. I’m set. I know what I’m doing.” Well by the end of the Holidays I had gained enough to spin me right back to my old ways. Since then, I gained my old weight back and then some.

    I don’t think I embraced the fact that it was going to be a long term change. (A plus factor you have that I didn’t.) I felt I’d put my time and work into it and that it would just continue with no further effort from me. I was wrong. Part of me feels that looking so good after losing so much weight actually sabotaged me into thinking I had it all under control. So I say to you, keep with what you are doing, don’t stop. Add more protein and water to your plan (these are always so easily forgotten) do what you have to do to keep you motivated and you will see a change, soon enough.

  54. #74

    Thanks for sharing your story, it is really motivating to me as I plod slowly along on my own journey… in 7 months I am down almost 25 pounds, which is great, but I am definitely struggling. It’s definitely not easy, and my thinking is absolutely twisted regarding food, weight, and exercise. The thing that really helps me is repeating your mantra of eat less, move more. I probably repeat it to myself 20 times a day! Mostly while I am doing that dreaded exercise….
    Anyway, thanks for sharing your story- it’s nice to know others are going through it together with me!

  55. #76

    Cathy, thanks so much for this. I’m in exactly the same place. I’ve been doing Weight Watchers for over a year now and have been 4 pounds from goal for the last 3 months! I know what I need to do, but I can’t get myself to stick to it…where did that enthusiasm and motivation go?!? Thank goodness for exercising, atleast that’s keeping my from gaining, but man…this stuff is hard! Anyway, its nice to know I’m not alone (and you’re not either!), thanks for your honesty.

  56. #77

    I’ve been lurk-following your story as I lost 25 pounds post-Baby 2, and now as I’m pregnant with Baby 3, I’m somehow jealous that you’re still “on track” as I see the scale go up and up. Talk about twisted thinking! 🙂

    It is a long, hard journey, and it’s months like this where you can be glad for the record that you have kept. Look at your “then” and “now” pics and be AMAZED! You look really, really good…strong and energetic, not just thin. Good for you!

  57. #79

    I think it is the time of year where our bodies decide that they like all the candy, treats, and heavy foods…it is like they know winter is coming and are trying to keep us stocked…I am having the same difficulty as you are Cathy!!! All I crave is the fatty foods, and I just can’t get enough! Hang in there though! We can do it!!

  58. #80

    Oh my, what you say is so true! Before a thyroid removal a couple of years ago I was very, very thin – but I had to work at it….avoiding almost all but the plainest, low calorie foods and eating very little (it was WORK!) Then the thyroid got removed and I put on a pound a week for 8 weeks…plus a little extra. Now you say that isn’t much but when you are 25 pounds more than you were and you still try to eat very little and perimenopause hits and you can’t lose easily like you used to…..yep, to sum up, I hear you. I want the sweets, I want to eat more, but I can’t and don’t (and add the occasional illness in which throws you off the exercize wheel and well, it can be discouraging – I know!).

    Last year daughter and I decided to give up all candy and walk every day for a month to see how we lose weight (some days I walked twice and we covered 3-4 miles at a time). In the end she lost 10 pounds, I lost…..nothing. Since the thryoid removal, I just don’t lose weight. It is soooo frustrating!

    Thanks for your posting – not only is it nice to see someone else working at it, but it is encouraging, I just ordered one of the books on running you had pictured in one of your recent posts.

  59. #81
    minnesota:madre | Sarah Jane

    I can’t tell you how timely this was today. Oct. was a pretty s****y month for me here, too. And I like what you said about changing what we eat FOREVER. That is a shift I haven’t fully made yet. I am trying to have faith that I’ll land in the right place with hard work and intention. Thanks for your honesty.

  60. #82

    Downs are definitely part of it. Plus, I know myself well enough to know my propensity to throw the baby out with the bath water. Im hoping that being aware of it this time, truly aware, will help me to focus on just staying the course. It is not easy.

  61. #88

    I know, I know. I mean, I say I know and part of me wants to buy into that. Ugh.

    I AM weight training now, with a trainer… you know, the I cant move my arms feeling the next day? Been doing this for almost a month too. And I really am enjoying the other stuff Im doing. Swimming, elliptical, etc.

    Still, I could use a full on sugar detox. Sho nuf.

  62. #89

    well i will TOTALLY enjoy Thanksgiving. And to be honest, Im facing the holidays with more optimism than I have had in years. I have exercise on my side, right?

  63. #90

    Rita, yep. I was running. Kind of a sucky run, in that, i never felt light and effortless.

    Im toying with the 2-week sugar detox. Toying being the operative word. ; )

  64. #93

    My wife just walked past my computer, looked over my shoulder (like she does sometimes, but that’s for Family Therapy, not Here) and she says “She’s gained four pounds of MUSCLE I bet.”) And it wasn’t uttered in that wobbly, high-pitched tone people use when really think you’ve probably gained four pounds of Chipotle Gourmet Mayonnaise. So there you go. Prolly 4 lbs of muscle.

  65. #96
    Nicole C.

    You never disappoint. You just wrote what my head thinks all the time about food changes – “What? I need to eat like this FOREVER?” That typically stops all forward momentum with the exercise and eating right energy. The hard part is continuing to make the efforts despite those nagging thoughts.

    I appreciate your honest perspective and your bravery for sharing it with us. I’m trying too. Good days and bad days included.

  66. #99
    Margy Eastman

    I’m with the crowd that says “get off the scale.” I haven’t been as thin as I was when I met my WW goal for two years, but I’m only 10 pounds above it…which puts me 30 pounds lighter than I was. Thankfully, Halloween only comes once a year. And you EXERCISE…and I don’t know where you stashed 4 pounds because you still have a tiny butt. I bet you don’t know where the 4 pounds are either:) You’ve developed some great habits and you’re fit. There are a few pounds that will come and go…and you’ll still look and feel great.

  67. #100

    I know a lot of other people have already given you great support and advice, but I’m throwing in my 2 cents anyway! Speaking from experience, it is hard (and scary), especially after you leave WW and go it alone. Just remember how far you’ve come, those pounds you will never see again, and the positive changes you’ve made. And even though the scale may go up, it will go back down, and this is a life change, not a diet. You have to treat yourself or you definitely might fall back into old habits! Good luck, Cathy, and I’m looking forward to reading more about your journey.

  68. #101
    k weiland

    Cathy….love reading your weight loss stories! I am also on the same journey. I have to say, I think you look fantastic and congrats on your progress thus far!! Pawn off the Halloween candy on someone else…get it out of the house and any other tempting sweet treats. Allow yourself some slip up time, set a date for when it will stop and just get back on track. You can do this…that’s what I keep telling myself. The word I picked for this year (thanks to Ali’s column) is “Persevere.” When I feel like I am not doing so well with my goals I repeat that word to myself as a reminder. Good luck and keep going as you are a great inspiration to me!!!!!!!

  69. #102

    “Sugar is nothing but little satanic crystals…” I’ve always thought sugar was evil – you confirmed it!

    Love this post Cathy – and the humor you inject into something painful – being real about where we are on this journey helps connect us all.

    I totally echo the “lecture” from Lynn and all the lovely comments that mentioned that (at least part of) your weight gain is muscle from strength training. And whenever you are converting fat to muscle – that is something to celebrate!

  70. #103
    Leslie B

    I think it’s good that you’re paying attention to the not so good stuff. By doing this, you’re learning and making this time different from the past attempts at losing weight. Fact is, this time IS different – you have pointed this out yourself. And a little slide backwards doesn’t have to mean that the whole effort is now totally screwed. It just means that it’s part of your journey and you are learning how much you’re willing to accept when it comes to indulgences. Personally, if I say/know something is off limits, then I just want it more. But if I have a little here and there as an indulgence – NOT AS A TREAT OR REWARD FOR MYSELF – then it’s all good in the hood.

    You’ve only been at this since January. Given that you’re looking at this as a life style change – as in the rest of your life – this is just a drop in the timeline bucket. This is the first time going through the holidays while on your new fangled healthy journey. Get the kinks figured out over the next several weeks and next year’s holiday season will be a piece of cake. (per se – ha!)

    Don’t let a few weeks bog you down. You are going about this the ‘right’ way – the healthy way – and planning for the long haul. If you have any doubt at all, put on those new jeans and check out your ass!

  71. #104

    I needed to read this today. I went to my WW yesterday and came close to losing my lifetime status. Halloween and sugar were the culprits. I know I can’t handle sugar – a little bit makes me want more, and then I lose willpower to say no to other things I shouldn’t have. A lot like the affect alcohol has on inhibitions… Well, I’ve started my own sugar detox now and know I’ll be feeling better, more clearheaded, and my jeans won’t be quite so tight in just a few more days.
    The one thing you really need to take from your experience today is that you RECOGNIZE when this is happening to you! And, you can turn it around. Go for a run. It will clear your head and get the endorphins cruising through you so sugar etc. won’t be calling to you so loudly!

  72. #105

    No matter what, you ARE a good person, in the core & the outer stuff too.

    Everything in moderation is my motto. You want fries? Share an order with Dan or the kids. You want some Sprite? Buy bottles so you can pour a small glass. Do you mind DIET Sprite? Less sugar is less sugar.

    You exercise, you run….and you LIKE it! That’s half the battle right there!

    I’ve been one of the many watching you on your journey, quietly cheering you on behind my computer screen. You’re AWESOME and you’re rockin’ this journey. You’re rockin’ as hard as Bret Michaels! HE’D be jealous of how rockin’ you are!

    We all have off days…hell, off WEEKS or MONTHS. Keep rockin’ Cathy. One of these days (or weeks or months) I’ll start my own journey. I really need it. I don’t recognize or like who I’ve become. Thank you for putting yourself out there and sharing your journey. You inspire!

  73. #106
    Tanya K.

    Wouldn’t it be nice if it were easy? You’re doing fabulous and it’s ok to slip up now and then. I’m 15 pounds from my goal, after losing 60 over the past year and a bit. But the summer was really hard for me with all of the camping and eating and lazing on the beach and eating and hanging with friends and eating…you get the picture. I haven’t lost anything in the past 6 months and have just finally made the mental committment to get back on track.
    I think half (90%!) of my problem is that I am so much happier with the way I look and feel now that it’s hard to have that same drive to lose that I had at the beginning. I think, ‘oh what’s 1 or 2 cookies going to do’. It’s a daily struggle that I keep hoping will get easier…wishful thinking I know 🙂
    I know you’ll get past this. I think as long as you keep exercising, the rest will follow.

  74. #107

    I have to make another comment b/c I was browsing through the comments and something caught my eye, something I think I agree with: those extra pounds are probably muscle! Bless their heavier-than-fat-but-skinnier-than-fat tissue properties!

  75. #108

    It really is a challenge, isn’t it? I lost a BUNCH of weight several years ago by following a specific program which had me watching food and exercising. The upshot was that I lost the weight and kept if off for a couple of years and then (cue dramatic music), I ate something that wasn’t on the plan while on vacation, and that was the beginning of the end for me. It was like the veil was lifted and I could see how much of my life was being taken up by the food shopping and the food washing and the food preparation and the toting of the food along everywhere I went and even the food eating, combined with the (self-imposed) need to exercise every single day. I was no longer enjoying my life but rather muscling my way through it.

    Needless to say, the weight came back on (but less than what I lost). Since then, I’ve taken a serious look at how satisfied I was with myself at whatever weight and decided that I would never be on a diet or weight loss plan or lifestyle change or whatever the current buzz words are surrounding that area again. I realized that I have a very black/white personality where weight loss (and other things, like giving up bad habits) are concerned–either I’m all in or all out. Until I can find that middle ground where I’m not so controlling about the food and exercise, I feel like my body is better off without all the yo-yo-ing.

    I have really enjoyed reading along as you navigate this part of your journey, Cathy. Thank you for sharing it with us and allowing us to be encouraged as we read along.

  76. #109

    Weird. Mine was 4.4 too. And every morning, when I wake up and check FB, and see how far YOU ran…all I do is feel guilty that I am not in my running place right now. At 45, I know that is a temporary thing, so I let it be, but it still doesn’t help. It’s a big circle-jerk (pardon the expression, but that’s what it is) and I just have to hope that the motivation to jump off hits before I gain it all back. And keep doing what I can to keep it from happening. It’s about constant reevaluation. (which is sometimes exhausting, which is why it ain’t happening here on the left coast.)

  77. #110

    Weird. Mine was 4.4 too. And every morning, when I wake up and check FB, and see how far YOU ran…all I do is feel guilty that I am not in my running place right now. At 45, I know that is a temporary thing, so I let it be, but it still doesn’t help. It’s a big circle-jerk (pardon the expression, but that’s what it is) and I just have to hope that the motivation to jump off hits before I gain it all back. And keep doing what I can to keep it from happening. It’s about constant reevaluation. (which is sometimes exhausting, which is why it ain’t happening here on the left coast.)

  78. #111

    Weird. Mine was 4.4 too. And every morning, when I wake up and check FB, and see how far YOU ran…all I do is feel guilty that I am not in my running place right now. At 45, I know that is a temporary thing, so I let it be, but it still doesn’t help. It’s a big circle-jerk (pardon the expression, but that’s what it is) and I just have to hope that the motivation to jump off hits before I gain it all back. And keep doing what I can to keep it from happening. It’s about constant reevaluation. (which is sometimes exhausting, which is why it ain’t happening here on the left coast.)

  79. #113

    Cathy thank you so much for not only telling us about your successes but your frustrations as well! I love reading your blog! It pushes me along. I will always have a struggle with the food thing. I have learned though that the key is exercise it makes me feel good and then I crave better things for me. I still eat crap but I try not to keep it at home. I thank you for all you have done for us your readers!! Jessie

  80. #114
    Courtney Walsh


    I just recently blogged about this too. Sort of. For me, it was more seeing Oprah’s interview with Portia de Rossi and hearing her say the only way she ever escaped her eating disorders was to stop restricting herself–both in portion size and in kind of food. I have lots of allergies so I’m one big walking food restriction, but more than that, I adhere VERY closely to my WW points.

    Then on the weekend, if I don’t lose, I eat whatever the heck I want. I’m starting to think this is some twisted form of self sabotage. I’ve been at the same weight for three weeks in a row. What’s up with that?

    I think it’s important to allow yourself some sugar, some treats… but for me, that always leads me down a very slippery slope. One with MORE sugar and MORE treats. Where is the balance?

    I am done having babies. Done watching myself balloon with pregnant water retention, so this time it feels like it’s for real. It’s final. And my body is fighting me harder than it ever has. I also love when people who’ve had eating disorders talk about getting over them, but they are still pencil thin. All I know is when I stopped starving myself, the pounds stuck to my body with the strength of a super-powered magnet. It’s hard not think that’s the only thing that will work for me.

    And when do we get to a point where we say “I’m happy here. I feel good here. I like my body here.” ???

    You look amazing. You inspire me.

  81. #122

    Andrea, I too have a hard time managing a little sugar. I mean, true, there is sugar in my yogurts (even the fat free has it) and in other things that are more hidden, so Id have to give up ALL sorts of stuff to really be rid of it. But, the muffins and the cookies? Very hard for me to manage.

  82. #128

    Courtney, sigh. I hear you. I wanted to watch that episode. I did just read about it in People (while treating myself to a pedicure this morning. I was tired of hitting the lap pool with less than stellar feet!)

    When I read her say that, about not restricting… thats nice. It wont work for me, because I dont have a built in sensor that says, Okay now… youre full!

    I have to think about this every day.

    Trying to figure out where my happy place will be and wondering why it cant be right hear and now.

  83. #129
    Courtney Walsh


    I am the same. I could never do that. I am sure of it. I would be 200 lbs. overnight. I just dont have it in me.

    Restricting makes me feel good somehow… ugh. Its a battle.

    At least were not alone.

    side note: Curious how you get your replies to your blogcomments to email the commenter? Mine dont do that! ack.

    To: courtneycrops@msn.com

  84. #130

    Am there…doing that!! Lost 100 lbs, and in a matter of a year…30 are back. I swore I would never gain it back…BIG MISTAKE!

    Now, my goal is to get back into my size 8. You know, it’s not the weight so much, it’s the FAT!!! Water weight I can deal with…LOL

    You’ll get…healthy til the end, that’s the motto…

  85. #131

    Courtney, i have an email box set up for comments that delivers to my Mac Mail account, so i can reply directly from Mac Mail. I started this about 3 months ago to better be able to answer questions and follow the conversations that emerge in the comments!

  86. #132

    1) you look amazing. you have done a ton of work to get to this point and I am so very impressed.
    2) have you considered taking measurements instead of just focusing on the scale? Those extra pounds could be your hard core muscles that weigh more than but are also slimmer than the ol’ muffin top.
    3) did I mention that you look amazing? you can do this. this is a new leaf you’ve turned — the old leaves (and therefore old habits) are gone, no need to worry about them cropping up again.

  87. #134

    Yes, it’s hard, but it is worth it. I struggle every day of my life with food, but I’ve been at goal weight now for three years, so I’m happy. Keep it up!

  88. #135

    Lots of wise words in these comments. Don’t be so hard on yourself. You are only human. It’s getting colder and darker and it’s that time of year that we all (except for those ridiculously happy southern california people) start to burrow in for the winter. And with that, we crave sugar. So allow yourself a little treat and then do a little bit more on your run or in the pool or on the elliptical the next day.
    You look fabulous. You want to be at a weight you can maintain, not a fantasy weight that will make you miserable day after day. And yes, muscle weighs more than fat. So keep on keepin on. You rock.

  89. #136
    Heather P

    Cathy you are doing an awesome job and I love that you keep it real. This is a minor set back and I know you will weather it. The great thing will be Halloween will better prep you for Thanksgiving and Christmas or as my brother calls it the eating season. You can do it! You will find a way to indulge and then bounce back – I know it can be done. We (or at least I) will keep cheering you on. You are not alone either as you well know. You have inspired me to finally get busy and move more/eat less and it is working. I know there will be slow times (like right now while I am hit with TMJ and mainly having smoothees), but I just keep moving and trying and it will make a difference. Thank you for posting this!!

  90. #137

    Cathy, chin up. We’ll get through these next two months!!! You’ve inspired me and I’ve lost 25 lbs so far…I’m stuck there right now, but I’m going to get over that.

    What is your “goal weight?” I’m 5’6 and I had one weight in mind, but my doctor wants me at chart weight 144. Needless to say, that is less than what was in my head. I really didn’t think I’d be 5 lbs away from my goal, so maybe her goal, (15 more lbs.) is reachable.

    You look great, you are so much more healthy than you were a year ago, you’ve inspired many of your readers. Chin up!

  91. #138

    Love hearing that “it’s muscle weight – don’t worry!” since I too stepped on the scale & saw a nudge upwards… So of course I’m now thinking “cool, it’s muscle weight!” However in the back of my mind I’m still thinking “uh uh, don’t believe that, it’s carrot cake & chocolate cake weight & sitting over 14 hours in a car for a few days weight!!”… *sigh, why do we kick ourselves so?! I refuse to purchase woman’s magazines to avoid all the pencil thin models that make me feel huge, but still have that buzz in my head that pencil thin is the goal!! Constant mental & physical challenges… Go us – all of us, whatever size we are, it’s who we are, and it’s all good! We are loved!!!

  92. #141

    Hi Cathy,

    Just a suggestion: L-Glutamine is very effective at curbing sugar cravings.

    I appreciate your sharing your struggles with keeping the weight off — mostly because I can completely identify with you! I’m in a very similar place and struggling to not re-gain all of the weight I’ve lost over the past year. So, I thought I’d pass on that small tip from a fellow Weight-Loss Warrior! It really does work! 🙂

  93. #142

    I just wanted to let you know I think you’ve done an amazing job moving more and eating less this year. The pictures you post each month show really AMAZING progress.

  94. #143
    Karn H.

    Cathy, I adore your posts and appreciate your tales from the scale.
    I think we as a society tend to villanize sugar. Sugar is not the enemy. Can we abuse it to numb us from feeling some icky feelings, sure, or perhaps get us through a stressful experience like a remodel, of course.
    Perhaps it’s time to start trusting your body, trust that it knows what it needs and give yourself the things that your body is craving. I’m not so concerned that you are craving sugar; I’m more interested in the “why” are you craving sugar. If it’s caused by stress, perhaps there is a better way to deal with the stress. If your body just wants sugar, give your body some sugar.
    Let me channel my inner Oprah: one thing I know for sure, if I’m craving sugar and I deny myself that sugar; I will rebel against myself.
    That’s my two cents. Thanks for sharing your successes and struggles and being transparent with us along your journey.

  95. #144

    I can totally relate to everything you said and have had the same struggle each time I lose (and then gain) weight. Only difference is that I haven’t found the love of exercise that you have. 🙁 Thank you for your honesty. You are not the only one.

  96. #145

    i really think that this time around is different for you and you will succeed!
    also, i love your before and after pic! that alone should…..well you know.
    also, you are still female and your body will NOT stay the same, (i’m using that as an exuse, right?)
    and i must say that i’m 2 1/2 days into weight watchers, and i’m pretty much ready to sell my second kid for sugar, glorious sugar!
    how did you stay alive this long????
    22 points a day is a killer!
    thanks for your inspiration!

  97. #146

    You’re an athlete Cathy…no matter what the scale says right now, that picture and what your body can do is no lie. Listen to Mama.

    But…uh… is there a point to your ‘derriere’ there???? or did you Photoshop that in to get our attention! whatevah, you are looking and doin’ good. Really.

  98. #147

    anna, it takes time to adjust to that 22 points. But if you stay focused, you can do it. Think of it as a daily thing. Dont look too far ahead!

  99. #149

    Thanks for keeping it real! I say that as I am coming off my sugar high from raiding my kids Halloween buckets. Ugh. Even though I haven’t gained weight, I feel so sluggish and yucky. I need a serious sugar intervention. It is comforting to know that I am not the only one that struggles with the healthy lifestyle and love how so many women are so supportive of each other. It has been motivating to read everyone’s comments.

  100. #150

    I. See. You. Sorry, just watched Avatar for, like, the hundredth time (its on HBO right now). But, seriously,I do. Just rolled out of a Halloween-candy-binge right into a 3-day-weekend-at-Disneyland-eating-all-sorts-of-great-crap-binge. And now I can’t seem to quit treating myself. Sigh. But, it’s all part of life. Just keep running. And, I know you are nursing your PF, but I swear, the key to this exercise thing is running at least 50-60 minutes. I was doing 40 minutes because of time constraints and I just was not feeling the “losing weight love.” Went back to 1 hour, 4 times a week, and feel so much better again. Thanks for always rocking the real world.

  101. #151
    Judy G

    I know exactly how you feel. I was exercising, joined weight watchers and lost 30 lbs over three months. We went on a three week cruise where I actually managed to lose weight by watching what I ate and exercising. When I got home I felt like I could do anything. Three days after we got home I broke my foot . For eight weeks I haven’t been able to put any weight on my foot , so no exercise. I also can’t drive so I am stuck in the house all day by myself. I have gained some weight, not exactly sure how much because the cast does weigh something. If my foot has been healing properly I am supposed to get a walking boot next week. If this doesn’t happen, I’m not sure if physically or mentally I will be able to handle it. Hope you can get back on track and thanks for sharing.

  102. #152

    First let me say I agree with everyone who said that we appreciate you being real. We do, we do!! I don’t want to hear someone talk about getting somewhere by not having to work hard, make sacrifices, and make hard decisions. I want to hear about their journey – the good, the bad, and the ugly. It’s about your journey- and to quote a song I just discovered: “if it all just happened overnight, you would never learn to believe.”

    Now, just to add my 2 cents: if you’re weight training, you probably did gain muscle. When I was doing P90X, the scale would.not.budge. BUT….I lost inches, and my clothes fit better. I think my body is programmed to be at this weight (but I started running so we’ll see) but I do know that with weight training, your muscles tend to hold on to water and lactic acid, and that may be what the extra weight you’re seeing is – both muscle and fluid. Don’t get down on yourself – your worth is not dependent on a number on a scale (my mantra). And just think of how healthier you are from when you started!!!
    Hang in there – you are rocking!

  103. #153
    Jennifer D

    Two thoughts I had while reading this:

    a) Sugar is awful. Back away from the sugar. (I actually see a huge difference between fruit and processed, refined sugar like candy. So I’m not suggesting to stay away from fresh fruit.) But seriously, it’s double the trouble – there’s no nutritional value whatsoever in Halloween candy AND at the same time if you are giving those calories to the candy, it’s calories that you aren’t spending on other food that your body actually needs. Btw, no judgement here – I too am dealing with the post-Halloween sugar issues. Calories do matter, but it’s also about giving your body what it needs – and where your calories are coming from. (And I’m reminding myself of these things as I type them!)

    b) You said you’ve started strength training? So it’s entirely possible that you are gaining muscle? If you are gaining muscle (which is a good thing), you may see that reflected in the number from the scale. With that as a factor it’s difficult to say how much might be a true gain and how much might just be building muscle.

    What you said is SO true: It can’t just be about the scale. Also, it’s a journey. Just because you got stuck or even had to backtrack a little doesn’t mean you won’t reach your destination – it just means you might have to check your map and find a different route. 🙂

  104. #154

    i honestly was thinking about this today. entering in the season of treats! (and natural hibernation!) … the less the sun shines, the more i want to pack in the heavy foods. and bake treats! i thought “i wonder what cathy is thinking about this time of year, now that she’s been kickin’ butt since jan?”

    i honestly think that you’re doing well. it’s good that you’re aware, and determined!

  105. #155

    I have so much respect and admiration for you, Cathy. Not because of what the scale says, but because you’re willing to be emotionally naked here. October through December are naturally wobbly times for so many reasons. Remember to be forgiving and kind to yourself. You are perfectly imperfect. And that is okay.

  106. #156
    Angie M

    Oh my gosh, I am so there with you! I started WW in January, the week before last was down 56 pounds, last week up 0.6, this week, who knows???? Holidays are coming. I’m hoping to stay steady and not go up more than 3-4 pounds in the next 2 months. I, too, have lost and regained plus many times before.

    We are human for sure! Thanks for taking us along on your journey. We’ll all make it one way or the other together 🙂

    Thanks for the honesty and not sugar coating the truth. It is hard, it is a life-long battle, sometimes it SUCKS!!!!!

    Thanks for sharing and allowing us to share.

  107. #157
    Angie M

    Just to add to my post above, I still, according to WW standards, need to lose another 32 pounds! I’d be happy with another 15-20 🙂

  108. #158

    okay so, from reading your blog I’ve:

    taught myself to knit (remember those episodes?)
    gone on weight watchers (.com)
    lost 15 pounds
    gained it all back when I lost my job (and then some)
    continued to knit (socks, scarves and sweaters)
    got an even better job
    gone back on weight watchers (.com)
    lost 18 pounds
    started running
    ran a 5k (not very well, but hey, I finished)
    continued to run 3 miles every other morning the GYM.
    continued to knit (baby sweaters, booties and christening blankets that will become an heirloom some day)
    signed up for another 5k on 11/20…

    Through the ups and downs of your life and mine, I have tested myself more than I ever would have by myself. Cathy, I thank you for that. You are a wonderful inspiration, in both your triumphs and your defeats. We are human. We only truly fail when we give up on ourselves.

    Take care, and have a muffin (or six)

  109. #159
    Pilbara Pink

    I am with those who think it is 4lb of muscle – well, 3lbs anyway 😉 I would like to raise a couple of points from other commenters – not to be a smartarse but just to give another perspective, ‘k? Everything weighs the same, in that a lb is a lb – what I think people mean when they say muscle weighs more than fat is muscle is denser so a lb of that takes up less space than lb of fat. So, that is why you can gain 4lb and lose inches – the extra muscle (4lbs) is taking up less space than that much fat would (inches) – sorry but this misconception drives me bonkers! The other thing bugging me (must be worldwide cranky-pants day!) is when people talk about their body wants this or that or tells them to eat sweets. Last time I checked I only had one brain and it was running all of me. Take the responsibility people – your body is not some separate entity attacking you, it is just part of your whole. It is YOU that wants that sugar, salt, fat (or preferably all three at once!) not some foreign being outside of your control!!! You are in charge, if you make a choice you feel bad about then own it, don’t blame it on `my body wanted/needed it’. OK rant over, thank you I do feel a little better 😉 Keep on keeping on Cathy, you have done wonderfully this year, moving more, eating less and inspiring so many others. Not a bad place to kick back and bask in for a little while maybe? Don’t beat yourself up but don’t give up either. Remember we all need a pat on the back – sometimes just a little lower than others, if you get my meaning 🙂

  110. #160

    Your post came right when I needed it Cathy.

    I have been exercising like a crazy girl for the last 6 weeks (summer is coming here in NZ – which makes holiday season even MORE painful.We stuff ourselves and then have to get into a bikini? ridiculous). My eating was all going well, plenty of salads, and I was feeling GOOD. I have even managed to get up to running 6k and was thinking about taking up swimming…But then…I got on the scales. A gain of 1kg. So unfair. To make it worse – I tried to go jeans shopping today – that really is one way to shoot the confidence!

    I am so glad to know that struggling and down days are just part of the process and journey, and that everyone goes through it!

    Keep on keepin on, you look smokin!

  111. #161

    Hi Cathy. You are an inspiration because you do keep it real and you look amazing! I lost 21.5 lbs. over six months of changing habits and I feel like a new person. But, the truth is it is difficult and some days (okay, more like a few days strung together) I just give myself what I want. And then I regroup and make the next day a “refresh” day which means I am back on track. During those several days the scale goes up but back down after a few “refresh” days. One thing I do is stay away from sugar (not carbs, I do have those) because once I start on the bad carb track I am lost. It is my trigger and I am fine until the trigger is pulled for too long. Have you checked out Melody’s blog from yesterday and today? It helped me so much. Here it is just in case: http://bravegirlsclub.com/blog/

    You are super awesome and be kind to the rockin’ girl in you! XOXOXO

  112. #162

    Actually I agree with you in part. Responsibility is key and choice, absolutely. However, research proves that are brains can become chemically addicted to sugars (whether alcohol or candy) and to highly processed manufactured food. The addiction is what many refer to as “their body needing” some sort of food. I recommend the book, “The End of Overeating” by David A. Kessler, Harvard-trained doctor, lawyer, medical school dean and former commissioner of the Food and Drug Administration. This book is life changing and has made me a much wiser and consumer (LOL!) of food choices and the food industry.

  113. #164

    Just glanced at the comments and yours caught my eye. 56 lbs! WOW and congratulations! How awesome and motivating. What an inspiration.

  114. #165
    Sally Paxton

    You are not letting anybody down. You are well aware of what you’re doing and why you’re struggling. You’re not only admitting it to yourself but to the blogosphere, as well. I don’t think you need to worry until you stop exercising and lock yourself in the bathroom so nobody sees what you’re eating! It’s a journey, and there will be bumps in the road.

    I’m down 23 pounds and have at least 30 more to go. And as hard as this phase is, I know that keeping it off will be even harder. Thanks for sharing your struggles and successes with us.

  115. #166

    If it was an easy road we would all be there Cathy. You really have come so far this year, it’s amazing.

    My toddler kept me on the straight and narrow today. As I was literally about to pull into McDonalds he said “go to McDonalds too!”. I knew if I went any further I would be hearing about McDonalds for the rest of the day and that would not be a good thing. Nor would it be a good thing for him repeat it to my hubby! For now we will stick to his current McDonalds answer. Me: What did I tell you about McDonalds?” My son: “unhealthy”. So maybe you need to borrow a toddler to help keep you in line?

  116. #167
    Heather H.

    No, if you gained it all back it would not make you a “bad” person. But it would affect your happiness and well-being. It is a tough road. And a lot of struggling. Sometimes I think it may be easier to be any other kind of junkie rather than a “food junkie”. One can’t check into a facility for sugar detox. Or stop eating altogether.

  117. #169
    Alison Shearer

    Cathy – It’s Ok to backslide a little as long as you stop the slide now…and move forward again.Give yourself a break every now and then..but you summed it up yourself – you feel prettier, smarter, more successful etc when you are lighter and you have to decide whether you are prepared to give that up. If not – then get back on board and move on. Up the exercise a bit if you have been indulgent…but just accept it’s OK as long as you stop the slide. (spoken from experience!!)

  118. #171

    My husband (a fit nut) says that once you reach a healthy weight, don’t go by the scale anymore. Go by your pants. You know what you are putting in your mouth, and the fluctuations will drive you crazy. The hardest thing for me is sugar too. Why in God’s name shouldn’t I finish off the bag of caramels, it is only one at a time! I too should never have eaten ONE piece of Halloween candy and a coke. Not one. Because then I crave and crave and cave and cave.
    HEY CATH! HEY!! Do you know what my arrow says when it hovers over the picture above? It says “Month 11”. That’s a BIG DEAL! Know what mine says? It says you need a “Month 11”. You keep hitting it, and I will be here with you. The only Sex Muffins we need are married to us. My bag of caramels is hitting the trash as I head out the door for the gym. Thank you for being you and sharing it with me.

  119. #172

    Thank you for the honest sharing of feelings, which resonate with so many of us. It DOES make us feel stronger and more control and more … other good things, if we feel (or actually ARE) thinner and lighter than before. Because it takes those things to get there. Strength, control over the cookie jar lid, perseverance — those things help us get healthier. But I clicked on a past post of yours, because you put those extra links at the bottom of your daily post, and I read these last lines from Feb. 4th, 2007, titled “Imperfection” : “And with that, another video for a song that i love. I mostly love the music, but i also love the fact that they are all running like crazy people. I love people who run like crazy.”
    Mini-weight gain aside, this means you love YOU!! So press on, Cathy. Keep doing the good things, K?

  120. #173
    Erin S.

    I am so glad to see that even you, Cathy Zielske, have this moment in your life. I don’t feel quite as badly about my own upflux of weight. Thank you for being real, like, really real, all. the. time.

    You still rock, Cathy!

  121. #179

    Bonnie, i have that book, and have been meaning to really read it. I know a little something about addiction and brain chemistry. Must get back to reading that book!

  122. #184

    It is so awesome. I plan on going to her Brave Girls Camp…creativity, true sisterhood, and so many forms of beauty smooshed together into a few days, what’s not to like? 🙂

  123. #185

    it’s been helpful to read a lot of the comments on this one. i’ve had to convince myself for 4 days to work out, almost losing the battle twice. my biggest WRONG step is when I say ‘tomorrow’, whether it’s food or exercise, I can’t wait until tomorrow to do what’s right or all of a sudden I’m a month down the road of not exercising or eating right. wish we just had buttons to push that would make us ‘do the right thing!’

  124. #186
    cindy b.

    My dear, dear Cathy…WHY are you living and dying by that damn scale? For real? It’s just NUMBERS!! You must live by the way you FEEL..how your clothes fit and how you have literally changed, from the inside OUT! If you could look INSIDE your body and see those muscles, see all the GREAT things going on inside you would be AMAZED!! You are doing a wonderful job and yes, I know, it’s a freakin’ struggle and god knows I’ve had my days (weeks) of eating those Mcdonald meals (HELLO! the McRib is back!), chips or other naughty foods but you know what? I’ve always continue to exercise so I have to stay FOCUSED on that. If I focus on the negative stuff about my slip up I would spiral out of control and I do NOT want to do that. Stay focused on the fact that you are maintaining your exercise program. 😉 Don’t overthink the calorie counting…can I recommend the EAT THIS NOT THAT books?! They are AWESOME and really, really eye-opening. I know this time of year is really hard for me. Stress = emotional eating for me and I am going to really try my best to stop that behavior before it starts but chocolate sure does comfort me that’s for sure. I love reading your posts and all the heart that goes into them!! ps. Are you lifting weights??

  125. #187
    Deonne Beron

    Wanted to drop you a line to thank you for being honest. I’ve been one of the people who’s appreciated and found inspiration in your posts about your fitness journey. I’ve been on my own for awhile now and this year it’s gotten interesting- more success and less disappointment. At the same time, I’m coming back to a weigh that’s proven to be a walled plateau for me in the past and honestly, it scares me- that number has always been stronger than I have in some mystical way before- I always bounce back up.

    But this time, like you said, some critical things are different. I am running. I am swimming (laps) and most importantly, I am enjoying them both and I think and hope and that it will make a big difference this time.

    I think that realistically this will be a lifetime of reminding and training myself to choose well in areas of food and fitness, but that also means that I won’t be perfect. I have to have tools and a mindset that allow me not to get sidetracked and lose all this progress in moments of imperfection. And by recovering faster, I’ll be doing body and mind a huge favor.

    So thank you thank you thank you for your honestly and please keep it coming.

  126. #188

    If you ever find the magic way of not getting bored of dieting, you’ll make a mint. Everyone can call it a “lifestyle change”, but it’s still dieting if we don’t get to eat all the crap that makes us fat to begin with. Darn those skinny people with great metabolisms. lol
    I’m sending you cyber hugs. Change is difficult, especially for the OCD types. I know that I fight it at every corner, even if the other side of the road would be better for me.
    Wishing you a chin up, a pain-free run and setting your sights on continuing your self-improvement. Throw those donuts out girl! It’s ok.

  127. #189
    Angie M

    After posting last night, I got on the Wii – checked my weight and was up 0.9 from the night before!!! What the heck???? I did a little running, then decided I would show the scale, ate pita chips and hummus! Guess that would do it 🙂 Today, all new resolve, new foods, new mindset!

    Good luck today 🙂

  128. #190

    Cindy, i am now doing weights. Twice a week, sometimes three times. I have a whole weight circuit workout that I do.

    I know I should not live and die by the scale, but i feel like it does keep me in check, as if to say, hey, watch it!

  129. #193

    I think WW is a great program. But I am a lapsed lifer. My problem with dieting, (of any kind), is that I am “too” good when I’m on the diet such that I never cheat (and I never ate the extra points) so, I am always hungry and a little grumpy. By the time I lose the weight, I end up feeling so “deprived,” that I very easily fall off the wagon. I can’t do that anymore. Now, instead of focusing on food obsessively (although I TRY to make healthy choices), I focus on moving more. As long as I am trying, I don’t beat myself. If my clothes end up being a little looser, that’s a bonus. It’s all about BALANCE and MODERATION.

  130. #196

    This has nothing to do with the fitness thing but I just wanted to thank you for sharing the Brave Girl sign page. Moved me to tears. . . for others and myself. What kind of sign would I wear? what would my children wear?

  131. #198
    Kim C

    I just love reading your blog. I love you. You are so real. Wt loss is hard and a struggle. Like you, halloween is still hunting me. Go away candy. But then it will just be something else. Enjoy how great you look, inside and out.


  132. #199
    Stacy Simpson

    Thanks for being so open about this process. I have enjoyed reading about your journey. While you’ve been losing, I’ve been gaining…ugh.

    BTW, you look fabulous to me!

  133. #200

    hi, cz … well, you’ve gotten plenty of positive feedback already without my late-game weigh-in [pun intended], but may i just say, sometimes you talk [type], & it’s so dang relatable, it’s spooky. about 2.5 years ago, i did ww & lost 40 lbs. then i quit doing ww – because of that FOREVER? REALLY, FOREVER? thing – & i’ve gained back about half. i’m still not at the magical place where i return to weekly meetings & food journaling & point tallying [which worked, but was a daily pain], but i definitely don’t feel as good about myself as i did 20 lbs. lighter. & i struggle with the shallowness of that. & i’m probably just still in denial about the true screwed-up-ed-ness of my relationship with food. & i’m rambling. but all of that just to let you know, you’re so SO not alone, sister. me & oprah, we’re right there with you. 🙂

  134. #202

    always appreciate comments, regardless of how late they come!

    Somehow, were wired for some of this crap, you know? If i figure out the great secrets, you better believe Ill post it here. And make a mint in the process. ; )
    Carry on!

  135. #203

    I’m in exactly the same spot. I run, I’ve lost 50 lbs, I’ve changed my life…then the doubts start creeping up. I ate too much Halloween candy, I started going out for fast food with my coworkers. The scale stops going down and starts creeping up.

    I often wonder if I am terrified to be a thinner person. If I could figure out why I am so afraid to succeed and why I am so afraid to throw away my “fat jeans” maybe I could conquer my problem forever. There is something really scary about getting rid of an old self-image.

  136. #204

    The part that scares me is that i know first hand what losing it, and then gaining it all back feels and looks like. For me, its not so much about being afraid to be thinner, its being a person who gives in to eating whatever I want, and not moving at all.

    Such a process, isnt it?

  137. #205

    Hi Cathy, I’m weighing in late with my opinion (ha, what a terrible pun!). I think you’re a huge inspiration and have been so excited for you with your weight loss. You look fantastic & have inspired me to lose a few pounds!
    I also wanted to add another take on the ups & downs of weight loss: consider that you’re going into winter and despite our modern lives it’s part of human nature to want to eat a bit more (store for winter) and move less (hibernate) during the cold months. I live in the southern hemisphere so when you started blogging about weight loss we were in winter & I couldn’t imagine wanting to get outside, eat less and lose weight. Now it’s spring and it’s all I’m thinking about. So maybe your word for the holiday season is ‘maintenance’ or ‘balance’. Don’t feel bad over a couple of pounds. Just try & have a few good days to even it up. Then I guarantee when spring comes round again it’ll get easier.

  138. #206

    Thanks, Lyndell! Im definitely feeling a bit more positive this week, and realizing that its part of the ebb and flow of this process!

  139. #207
    jeanie york

    I too am on the same boat with you. I have lost 96 pounds and in the last few months gained 20 of that back. It is not the first time either. I had hoped it would be the last one however. My downfall started at church camp this summer, when I thought I had it all under control and could eat a little something now and then, Well truth be told, you can NEVER eat a little something ever again. I fell off the wagon and am trying to climb back on as now I have about 50 more pounds to lose. We can never give up. I know all the things you have to do, and its easy to say tomorrow…… but the mind is a tricky thing, and all it takes is one cookie, to throw you over the edge and its a long climb uphill again.. but being a strong woman, You can do it and so will I. Thank you so much for sharing your journey. It makes me feel human also.. Keep up the good work and the journey.

  140. #208

    Hey Jeanie, thanks for your comment. It is a very tricky thing all around. But theres always the reality that yes, you and I both know how this works and how to do it. Thats a good thing!

  141. #209
    Kristen Carpinello

    Well, count me in among those who just cannot resist the 8 lbs+ of Halloween candy sitting in the house just begging to be eaten, and who now have more spilling out over the top of their jeans than they care to. Darn! Where is willpower when I need it???

  142. #211

    You look fit and terrific and you are allowed variation. Stay proud of how much you have accomplished. When I was a smaller size I would think about how much exercising each indulgence I had would cost me. It helped me decide when it wasn’t worth it. Don’t know if that helps. I certainly am not living that philosophy now. You have done a fabulous job getting healthy.

  143. #212
    Kate Blue

    wowo, I had no idea…you are brave to document…I’m just not sure I can ever utter the words I LOVE TO EXERCISE…maybe I should scrap that!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *