Meet my dying Dirt Devil. Dirt Devil, blog readers. Blog readers, Dirt Devil.
I bought this shimmering example of cleaning efficiency in 1990, the year I moved to Minnesota to shack up with an ambitious coffee shop upstart by the name of Daniel Ezekiel Zielske, Jr. Moving in with a member of the opposite sex was bound to bring many changes, but regardless of how different things were going to be in my life, dust bunnies still had no business occupying the various living spaces of the 1880s duplex we were sharing in the Frogtown neighborhood of St. Paul.
This Dirt Devil has seen every single momumental mess or crumb pile of my entire adult life.
It was there to suck up many fur balls from my now deceased and much loved pets.
It was there to vacuum up countless Cheerios flung callously from high chairs by the two Zielske toddlers.
It was there to clean every single nook and cranny that the large vacuum simply couldn't reach.
And it did this, without so much as a thank you, for 21 years.
Think about this: 21 years, people. 21 years of weekly use and not once did it break down or stop working. (Okay, so the on/off switch died about 10 years ago, but that, friends, is what packing tape is for.)
I loved this thing so much, I wrote about it in one of my "Me: The Abridged Version" albums. Here's what I said a few years ago, under "V" for "Vacuums that get their money's worth":
I’ve had the same, red, Dirt Devil can vac since 1990. That is 19 years for anyone who’s counting. NINETEEN YEARS! I’m sorry, but I love this portable can vac. Sure, the little guy has seen it’s better days. The on/off button hasn’t worked in years and I simply plug it in to hear the lovely roar of the suction begin, but I have to say, it still works as well as the day I brought it into Dan and my’s relationship. That’s what is wild: the vacuum has lasted as long as our relationship. Dan doesn’t love this little vac the way I do. He chooses to put the attachment hoses on our upright whenever he’s tackling a vacuuming task. He doesn’t realize the superior suction power and the easy of mobility afforded by the Dirt Devil. What is sad to me is that Dirt Devil no longer makes the same model. Sure, they have something similar, but all the online reviews I’ve read say over and over: it’s not like the original. I feel like every time I’m cleaning, I’m using a family heirloom—a precious family heirloom. And that’s okay by me. I heart you, Dirt Devil. Please don’t die on me anytime soon.
But like many relationships in life, sometimes they simply run their course.
The suction has been slowly lessening over the past 6 months and I was beginning to realize that my time with this beloved little tool was coming to an end. All the fresh replacement bags in the world weren't helping it to pick up even the simplest of random crumb piles. While I did do a modest amount of research, looking at higher end can vacs from companies like Dyson and Miele, in the end, I just decided to stay true to a brand that has served me so loyally over the years, and I bought this:
Another reason I picked up this model? The prices on the Dysons and the Mieles made the large vein in Dan's forehead throb uncontrollably.
Will it be a relationship for the ages, me and the new Dirt Devil Vision?
I can say this as of today: it totally sucks, as in a good suction way, which is already an improvement over the current state of its predecessor.
Long live the Dirt Devil.