During the past year, Dan has been organizing and cleaning our attic. I've mentioned this before and even though I don't actively reap the benefit on a daily basis, every time I do have cause to venture into the rafters of our home and see the level of organization (Halloween stuff in that corner, Christmas stuff over there, National Geographics over there), I'm grateful that I can now find my suitcase and my curling iron, should the need ever arise.
While returning a few things to the attic last weekend, I saw one of the few remaining baskets of stuff that Dan has yet to sort through and I realized it was stuff from my glory days of roller yore.
What? You don't recall my glory days of roller yore? Maybe this will jog your memory:
Yes, I came across a basket of roller skating memorabilia, including this lovely award from a meet in Auburn, Washington circa 1979.
Yes, that does say '1st PL.' You're welcome, Auburn.
Buried amidst the other medals and plaques was something I hadn't laid eyes on in years. My United States Amateur Confederation of Roller Skating binder.
How do I know for sure it was mine?
I wish I could tell you how many hours I spent poring over this book… this veritable tome of rules and guidelines put forth by the USACRS.
Enclosed were all of the rules and regulations to this beloved—by me, anyway—sport.
But what struck me was just how 70s the design of it was. I mean, someone thought this looked good back in the day.
But it got better.
It's not really a surprise that figure roller skating never achieved the superstar sport status of its counterpart on ice. I mean, what does this design say to you?
Exactly. Xanadu forever.
That cover really belittles the content housed within the pages of this manual.
For the record, I didn't know a single skater personally who could do a Double Axel, let alone a Double Boeckl!
I mean, come on! A Double Boeckl? Let's come back down to Earth, people.
Let's just come right back down to Earth.
This post has not been brought to you by the USACRS. However, I did find this totally awesome video with cheesy music pleading the case of artistic roller skating, laden with typos, as to why we should be included in the Olympic Games.
And yes, I did just say 'we'.