What now?

Cathy ZielskeCZ Life70 Comments

cathyzielske.com | now what?

cathyzielske.com | now what?
First up, I have to say thank you to so many of you who left comments on this post.

I’d hoped to strike an accurate tone, one that captured the frustration and the reality of a life long battle with looking in the mirror and not feeling good in my skin. I ain’t gonna lie: I was really afraid of getting called out by someone who would say, “Just shut up already and DEAL.” As a thin-skinned human, those comments always hurt just a little. Okay, a lot.

But you all just shared your stories and commiserated. And on a day where I was feeling like shit, possibly more so from the sugar withdrawal than anything, I deeply appreciated your commentary.

So what now?

There are a handful of movies I’ve watched numerous times. Many of them are not very becoming of a post-menopausal, middle-aged scrapbooker, and right at the top of the list is Pulp Fiction, which I managed to see a portion of over the weekend for like the billionth time. This scene. Good God. Right now, in my mind, as I look toward making changes and taking better care of myself, I’m channeling Ving Rhames and saying, “What now?”

I’ll tell you what now. Now it’s time to ditch the sugar, first and foremost. I wish I was like those people who have a cookie and move it on down the line. I’m not. I’m the person who is stuffing cookies into her pockets like Dan Akroyd stuffed fishes into his Santa suit in Trading Places. I’m the one who eats Oreos like popcorn. I’m not a moderator and right now, I need to embrace that and ditch the junky, sweet stuff. And for now, that includes cheap red wine that I so love. Why? Because it just turns into sugar and then I’m doubly screwed: I get the sugar AND make more bad choices because I’m buzzed.

I’ll tell you what now. It’s back to real food. Vegetables, meats, fruits and water. It’s not a punishment to eat real, unprocessed food.

I’ll tell you what now. It’s time to exercise again. I don’t need to be some Cross Fit super human. I need to get out and go for a freaking walk. Daily. I need to get up from my computer more frequently. I need to see about re-joining my old gym and getting back into the pool. I need to move it before I lose it.

I’ll tell you what now. I need to connect to reality every day. Life is complicated and it’s stressful and it’s wondrous. There ain’t really a script to follow so I need to woman up and deal with each day with a fresh heart and eyes.

I’ll tell you what now. I plan to be more grateful for this body—this body that hasn’t let me down in any discernible way. I’m still going to work on being healthier and hells bells, if I drop some chub around the middle, good for me.

Again, I am grateful for this online space. A lot of my best stories have zero to do with scrapbooking, and yet you seem to hang in there for the long haul.

I’ll tell you what now. Thank you.

 

Cathy ZielskeWhat now?

70 Comments on “What now?”

  1. #2
    Lynne Gillis

    One more thing for the “what now” list… we’re here for you. Now. Tomorrow. Always.

  2. #3
    Barb

    Thank you for this today. I had a positively CRAPTASTIC day (which doesn’t even come close to describing how shitty it was) complete with a panic attack. I need to do all the things you listed above. When you write them down, they just seem reasonable and totally doable. If you can do it, so can I. Thanks Cathy.

  3. #4
    Jennifer

    I dropped sugar, wheat, and flour and I’m down 55 lbs in just over a year. I have a drink occasionally but I do miss my red wine. I ate Oreos like popcorn also and I knew I had to make cuts in my life if I was going to change it. I still get angry about it sometimes (because it’s not fair I don’t have fantastic metabolism!) but I’ve never felt better:) Good luck!

  4. #5
    Liz

    I’m on the same page Cathy… I’m working so hard at it and that’s exactly what it is… so hard! Please don’t think you’re alone!

  5. #6
    Mona S

    I meant to respond to your first post, but better late than never! I have been reading Burn the Fat, Feed the Muscle in hopes of changing my eating/lack of exercise. Now, there isn’t really any new information in this book (eat better, exercise more) but the chapter on goal setting was eye opening to me. Without writing a novel, your conscious mind makes the decisions (eat a cookie or not, exercise or not) and your subconscious mind is the computer running in the background that does not make decisions. It keeps your heart beating, your lungs working, etc. And it does what we have programmed it to do. If we tell ourselves negative thoughts “I will never loose weight” “I will always be fat”, the subconscious mind does what it was programmed to, so when we tell it we will always be fat, eating the cookie or not isn’t about willpower. It is how we programmed our subconscious to act. Very eye opening to me. That one chapter has been worth the cost of the book to me! Good luck in your journey and if you wouldn’t say it to your daughter or your bff, don’t say it about/to yourself!

  6. #7
    Dawn

    I love you man. We all love you or we wouldn’t be hanging around listening to your every word. We love you because you remind us all that we struggle with the same crap. We love you cuz you keep it real. And give us a little chuckle in the process. Xo

  7. #8
    Keianna

    Two ways I ditched the sugar:

    Whole30: http://whole30.com

    21 Day Sugar Detox: http://21daysugardetox.com
    You can skip the program they sell and just by the book. It has all the information and recipes.

    Took me 3 tries to finish the Whole30. But the freedom I feel not being beholden to food and hating myself a little bit after each meal was/is so very worth it.

  8. #10
    Steph

    Cathy, thanks for always keeping it real! I’m so with you in this stuff. Just started working out again a few weeks ago. A bit disheartened at not losing much weight, but getting toned. Continuing on!

  9. #11
    Jill

    If I can suggest a documentary that might point you in the right direction…
    Please take the time to watch, “Forks Over Knives”, it’s on Netflix and is life changing.
    I am two years into eating a more Plant Based Whole Foods Diet and it has made a difference.

  10. #12
    Cindy Lee

    I get in these great kicks where I drink smoothies, eat salads and have a low carb diet but sometimes I’m just sick of it. I have to force myself to prepare things like roasting a boat load of veggies I like. But it’s really my weakness (food prep) which leads to grabbing unhealthy food. Anyways I’m babbling. Thanks for always being real. Good luck!!! Pulling for you!

    1. #13.1
      Jacquie

      I’m with you Amber. Those of us in the Great White North (okay, maybe not that far north) were teased with Apothic Dark a few months back, and now it is gone, apparently never to return to the Winnipeg shelves. I’m on my way south tomorrow morning and you can bet that if they have it in Dallas, I will be sipping it by 12:05!

  11. #16
    Katie

    cheering for you 🙂 you can do this! I admire you for giving up the wine…oh man I love it…and I usually make not the greatest food choices with it. I am trying moderation, and mostly do ok and other times not so good LOL. But I do know this, we all have to do what is right for us and I am cheering for you 🙂

  12. #17
    Sally Kemp

    Thumbs up, Cathy, hang in there. I quote from that movie at least once a week. The Wolf would say, “Grab a bag of carrot sticks (and some cleaning solutions and blankets) and let’s get this done.” Just keep going. Don’t be so hard on yourself, all of us 50 somethings are fighting the sag right there with you. Be cool, Honeybunny.

  13. #18
    Laura

    We all struggle with many if the same things. Thanks for the courage to share your struggle publicly with us. I kicked sugar, gluten and dairy for my health. I did it for me, I finally figured out that I am sacred, my one little word this year. I am not done here evidently but I continue to work on it. So, what now? I say send your heart and body some love every day as the sacred being you are. And when you mess up, like I do, send yourself forgiveness…

  14. #19
    Kerri

    OMG…another example of our parallel lives! I read this post as I was gnawing on a giant Reece’s Bunny from Easter. The bunny=3.5 servings. I ate freaking awesome today and just finished a salad for supper when I pulled out the bunny and ate a 200 calorie head. Ugh!

    The thing giving me hope today is listening to the audiobook The End of Dieting by Joel Fuhrman. His book Eat to Live is what helped me lose almost 40 pounds right along with you awhile back. He is the doctor promoting a “nutritarian” or “flexitarian” lifestyle and was Joe Cross’s doctor in the first Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead documentary. I like his approach…quit focusing on what you shouldn’t eat and instead just try to stuff yourself with nutrient-dense food. His theory is that you won’t have as much room to binge on the crap and you’ll slowly begin to crave more good stuff and less bad stuff. I did find that to be true but somehow detoured into fairy-tale land of denial and excuses. I’m working to quit hopping on and off the wagon of healthy eating and exercise. Enough.

    Something to consider…as a counselor myself, I can say that therapists aren’t always the best resource for working on health issues. Working with a health coach who is also a master’s level counselor might be useful if you’re looking for professional support. A little less talking/over-analyzing and a lot more planning/accountability!

  15. #20
    Tina Joergens

    Cathy, I’m just damn sure you can do anything you want! You prove it time and time again. You got this and if you don’t believe me, visit your friend Kerri – http://www.kerribradford.com/2014/02/23/got/. This was one of the first cut files I got from her and it hangs in black on pretty paper right next to my work space!

  16. #21
    Susan

    It really does suck. I try to be comfortable being me, but it’s hard sometimes. Both of your posts really resonate with me. Thank you for putting yourself out there. It helps to know we aren’t alone in this.

    Since last May, I lost 77 pounds. I was tired of being fat. My dad and brother had just been diagnosed with diabetes. My mom, my 70- something mom still hated herself. It was time to do something. So I did. Then I let myself celebrate my birthday in mid-Feb. That, along with a bunch of stress and too much lovely red wine helped me gain 15 pounds in a month and a half.

    So what now? I start doing the hard thing. Back to my Fitbit, Myfitnesspal and a new Dietbet. Have you done one of those? It totally brings out my competitive side because I can’t stand to lose, even to myself. I started this one today. http://diet.bt/PIVbFw

    I’m also going to print this post out if you don’t mind. I need the reminder to woman up, just do this and to be grateful for this body I was given. Thanks for the pep talk…even if it was directed at yourself. 🙂

  17. #23
    Michelle

    I’m so proud of you…hope you are too!! All we can do every day is try to do better. Thanks for being so real.

  18. #24
    missy

    Love reading your posts! Need to follow because as I sit here drinking my cheap Chardonnay my mind is on the boot camp class that I skipped tonight (you know, the one I already paid for and made excuses not to go to)… time to woman up.

  19. #25
    Jeanette

    Oh my gosh Cathy! You rock! My turn around has been buying a Nutribullet and making green smoothies! I never, I say, I NEVER thought I would like them. It’s a fantastic one meal (or two) meal replacement. Experiment girl. You got this!

  20. #26
    Kim Woods

    I love it! Strive for health not “hot body” 🙂 I do think you need to reward yourself with SOME wine some of the time. That’s my issue too. I have ZERO sweet tooth but love chips and vodka. Both turn to sugar too. If I work out it cancels out the negative effects of both. I had a victory today… we filmed a send off for my friend going to have a pancreatic cancerous tumor removed on Tuesday. I was ok with how I looked in the video. I looked like a real friend that’s curvy and short but not “Fat” and I’m a healthy mom. I think as we go through these “middle” years we just need to focus on what is healthy and will keep me on this planet. Your post sounds like you are on that track. Above all be kind to yourself because YOU are enough!

  21. #27
    Emily

    Hi Cathy! I’m a long-time reader and fan and I wanted to comment (which I almost never do on blogs, but should!) because something you wrote today cut right into me. I am a mom of 6 (the oldest is seven – we were wonderfully lucky to naturally conceive two sets of twins) and so at 33 my body has really been put through the ringer. Now, amidst the daily care of all these sweet kids, I almost never have “me time” or too many opportunities to feel like a person instead of a mom robot. I grew up on processed foods and still love them, as well as healthy foods, but junk food is just more fun. I find myself looking for something fun, some kind of reward that can be achieved in 90 seconds or less since that’s about as much time as I have at once, and it always comes back to junk food that makes all my postpartum body frustrations even worse. I’m tired and feel spent and bad food just makes me more tired and feel more spent. Today, reading “It’s not a punishment to eat real food” really struck me. This junk food problem is not a reward, it’s adding insult to injury. I am lucky to be able to afford quality food and have access to it. I am a pretty decent cook. It’s not a punishment to walk down a road that will lead me (and my family for heaven’s sake!) to better health and a more vibrant me. It’s a privilege.
    Thank you for your words. Best in health!

    1. #27.1
      Cathy Zielske

      Hey Emily, thanks for commenting… and yes, it is a privilege to be able to take care of yourself. What a great perspective.

      I need to keep that in my thoughts. Always.

  22. #28
    Jeanie W.

    You always help me refocus to what is important for me too! Get rid of those negative thoughts as soon as you realize they have surfaced. Replace with a positive mantra about how well you are doing, how much better you are feeling and that you have so “got this” and will keep on pursuing the good choices offered to you – they happen every day!

  23. #29
    Briel

    Hi Cathy! I didn’t read all of the other comments, so maybe I’m saying something that has already been said. Another what now: You don’t have to do it all now, today. Each step is one step. Maybe you cut back on sugar. Maybe you walk more. It’s not zero sum. It’s everything together. You get to choose over and over again, and each time you can make progress. Thank you for continuing to be real, because the last time I checked, I’m real too.

  24. #30
    Paul B

    I have done the exact same thing about 5 weeks ago Cathy. I’m crap at moderation. So I cut ALL sugar out. I’ve not cut out anything else. I still eat too much cheese etc. But the cravings are gone & my hunger is in control. I actually feel full and don’t want to eat. I’m sure everyone will have a different outcome & benefits to giving up sugar. And I’m aware that at some point, I will want to start eating sweet things again but not sure how to re-introduce it without returning to my old ways. A hurdle for the future. In the meantime, my treat of choice is All-Butter croissants. It’s not a health food but it’s also not a sugary treat. I’m never going to be, not do I ever want to be, an extreme health nut. I eat fruit, even bananas and croissants and I’m losing weight. And I went to a party where my treat was to drink fizzy water whilst champagne was being supped, and I passed on the beautiful cake which was handed around. I felt like the biggest bore there. Parties, for me, used to involve drinking and smoking to excess. I miss that guy. A LOT! But I have to treat my older body with more respect these days. My reason to live is to rebel. I love irreverence and individuality. I was asked at the party, how do I rebel these days? Except for having opinions, I’m not sure. I nod my head with every word you write about this subject. I recognise every feeling and every obstacle. I wish you every strength & success with giving up sugar. If I could offer up any advice, I’d say get rid of everything in the house with sugar. Or give it to Dan to hide. Only for the first week or so when the temptation is at its strongest. And eat sweet fruit. It worked for me. It’s hard at the start but actually it’s easier than giving up smoking and the cravings disappear much quicker too. Good luck. Hugs. P xx

    1. #30.1
      Cathy Zielske

      Paul, I totally get that whole thing. When I cut out sugar and just eat well, a strange thing happens: I feel just fine. I too had that rebel mentality. Smoking was HORRIBLE for me, but it was subversive. And it was the friend that never lied.

      It’s very easy for me to not have crap in the house, actually. Dan doesn’t eat it. And if I just avoid whatever crap IS here, I’m fine.

      🙂

  25. #31
    sonja

    OMG Cathy! As I was waiting for your post to load on my phone (I did not know what it was about yet) I was making myself a coffee at work and debating with myself if I should have a cookie. I too eat oreos and any other sugary items like popcorn and I was wondering if I should ditch the stuff. I once quit smoking, surely I could do this? But it’s hard. It tastes so nice. Well, just do it like you did then: one cookie at a time. ‘Quitting’ is a verb. It’s not a moment. It requires action constantly. So I didn’t open the cookie jar but went to read your post instead…

  26. #32
    KathyinMN

    Spent yesterday thinking about what to respond to your first post. When you started running oh so long ago, I wished so hard you’d stick with it, only because (as an adult onset runner) it just helped me so much. I know, what works for one doesn’t work for all. But I know others who feel the same way about it, and have had similar results. See, running doesn’t solve problems-but something magical happens out there on the road. I forget I hate my body (in fact, I’m often amazed at what that runner girl can do) and it brings balance to the rest of my life. It makes me want to eat better. It makes me deal with life’s issues with a better attitude. It kicks my depression away. Then the guy that writes the Oatmeal wrote about it doing the same for him. (see here: http://theoatmeal.com/comics/running ) And people in running forums (ok, reddit) write about the same. I had wished that for you.

    I wish you well on your journey. I hope you avoid the darkness. I hope you learn to love yourself. I hope you can find that whatever it is that will work for you.

    1. #32.1
      Cathy Zielske

      Kathy, I loved running. I DID experience that incredible sense of power that comes from it. Not a runner’s high; just a sense of, “Holy shit! I can do this!” The foot surgery threw a wrench into the works. I still think I can do it again.

  27. #33
    Maureen

    Cathy I loved walking and after a knee replacement when I thought I’d be able to get back to it, I have a bone spur on the other leg heel to deal with! Damnation. So I do as much as I can and resist the idea that I need to eat even less. Fortunately, the elliptical doesn’t hurt at all. But sugar in all its forms…chocolate, carbs…ah don’t we just love ’em. They truly fill an emotional need, in an unhealthy way, especially when I overindulge. When a bit turns into addictive eating, then I know.

    btw, Overeaters Anon is good and free! because you don’t have to be overweight to get more in touch with your relationship to food. I have my foundation in another 12 step program and use that for food too.

    Here’s another tip that I learned in a work related class. When we eat with guilt, it causes stress which causes cortisol to be created in our body. Higher cholesterol and also fat. F*ck guilt.

  28. #36
    Tracey

    45 year-old me needs this so much. Thank you for sharing your map and leading the way, including how you handle those endless bumps in the road.

  29. #37
    Krystyn

    Oh Cathy – I am right there w/you on the life long battle of weight/body image etc. I recall being 8-10 yo and being told (by my family members) that I was fat and needed to eat better. Yeah, that was great! Anyway, the battle continues. I continue to work at it. As a lot of us do. And while I’m not always good at seeing the positives in my life to get me out of a somewhat unrelated funk…sometimes that’s what we need to do.

  30. #39
    Joanna Henriksen Bjerga

    I’ve been mulling around a clever comment too, but can’t come up with anything – apart from just saying thank you again for being you, and for womaning up – again! You haven’t failed until you stop trying, right?

    When I read yesterday’s post, I was one click away from signing up for a weight reduction class. I didn’t. But today I will. I obviously can’t hack this on my own. So here we go again.

    I know all the theory – Fuhrman? Check. Sisson? Check. Vegan? Check. Low carb? Check. No sugar? Check. HIIT? Check. Aaargh. Just have to DO IT.

    If you can, so can I. 🙂

  31. #41
    sunny

    I just read your last post and now this one. Thank you for being so honest…. you’re saying what so many of us feel. I turn 50 in a few years (how did we get to this age?!) I’m not great with the self-talk… as in I say stuff to myself that I would never say to a friend! Then one day I was on the elliptical (blech. I am a wimp on that machine!) but I lasted 20 minutes and told myself “way to go!” and my face lit up just as if someone else had complimented me. WHAT?! I can say good things to myself and my body will react as if someone else said it?

    I have also realized that when I have friends who gain or lose weight, it doesn’t affect my love for them one bit. They’re my friends and family! It’s who they are inside that matters… I know some would like to be more athletic or lose some pounds, but I will love them through the process or even if they never lose a pound…I’m still there for them. I had to realize…. my friends then are there for me…and love me for who I am today – regardless if I lose another pound or not. The things they love about me (and the things I like about myself) are not based on if I look stunning in the mirror. They love my smile, my cheerfulness, my love for others, my self-assurance, my story telling (even if I do ramble on and on… see this long post?!) . Cathy, what do you love about yourself? what do your friends and family love about you? I bet they love you no matter what you look like. I’m learning to soak up the love of family and friends and reflect that love back to them instead of silently absorbing it then disagreeing with them and feeling uncomfortable in my body. (I’d still like to be leaner and stronger… but that’ll be a process of moving my body more.) 🙂 I have loved your style, your writing, your sense of humor for all these years I’ve read your blog and your books. You can do this! 🙂 I’ll be cheering you on.

  32. #42
    Laura

    Walking with you in the sisterhood of blessed middle-aged introverted scrapbooking Mamas who perhaps look more Rubenesque than we’d like, but know that we got this. :::fist bump:::

  33. #43
    Michael

    Cathy, have you heard of the Whole Life Challenge? I’ve found it really helpful to make small sustainable changes that make a big difference in how I feel and provides a ton of support while doing it. The next challenge starts May 2nd. You could be on my team! 😉

  34. #44
    Christine

    I was having a conversation the other day about goals and new habits and making your life be/look like you want. The other person in the conversation quoted a phrase she knows from Turkey……drop by drop it becomes a lake. I’m more like monsoon equals instant lake please or I’ll just stay in the empty hole. Working on embracing drop by drop.

  35. #46
    Gypsy Chaos

    Why do I love Cathy? Inspiring work at every turn. Continuous tweaking of methods and goals. Reinvention – new website, taking control of your classes, etc – while retaining the same core message. SHOWING me what memory keeping means, and ways to record those moments – using real life stories; much better than telling me what to do, step by step, without providing examples. Sharing the realities of life for a woman of a certain age, mindset, and socioeconomic status. Being honest. Always. Living an un-Photoshopped life, letting us observe the warts and all.

    Oreos – OMG. Do you know how often “oreo” is the answer in crossword puzzles? Way too often!! My problem: my husband does the shopping and cooking. I NEED to take over. Thanks to him, we have the junk food lovers’ pantry. Want cookies? What kind – at least four available. Want chips? Corn, potato, cheetos, and more. Want salty? Pretzels, nuts, etc. The refrigerator is similar. Makes me want to scream. That wouldn’t be nice so I stuff whichever junk grabs my attention now and stuff my mouth.

    sigh.

  36. #47
    Kathy

    Hi Cathy I wondered if you would get the “Liver Cleansing Diet” by Dr Sandra Cabot out of the library. It’s an 8 week period getting off the processed food (it doesn’t include sugar, coffee, dairy etc) however (being a LTM of weight watchers but still overweight and 51) the “LCD” astounded me because it took away the “I gotta eat everything in sight”. There’s what I consider as “being good” and not eating rubbish but it’s a real conscious decision and hard to “give it up”. When I was on the LCD I had no cravings (and I am addictive to chocolate). I was losing weight which was expected and was the main aim however what surprized me the most was my body was full after each meal and I didn’t “crave” anything sweet vs “me being good and not eating sweet”. The good thing about this is the Liver makes your whole body function and being “mp” your metabolic rate slows down. A good functioning liver gets everything functioning. It’s in 3 phrases – first 2 weeks, then the middle 4 weeks then the last 2 weeks. Maybe if you started off with one round of the 8 weeks to give your body a good healthy start. Being hungry and wanting sweet food is what breaks the diet but on the Liver Cleansing Diet you don’t feel hungry and you are eating good food. We all need a little boost and to take the “will power” out of the equation was for me HUGE… My girlfriend has gone on it and this was the big thing for her as well….she said she is not hungry and doesn’t think about or crave sweet food. Anyway if you focused on an 8 week kick start it would give you the confidence to feel good again. Regards Kathy

  37. #48
    Laura

    Jamabalya, Cathy! I am so glad I read this post and your previous one before heading out to pick up lunch. I was envisioning (salivating over, to be truthful) a combo #1 from Wendy’s (no cheese and a small fries because that makes it acceptable?!?). Instead, I made the CHOICE to go to Subway for a 6″ veggie sub on brown. And I feel good! Good about the CHOICE I made. Good about it being only 6 WW points rather than what, 15? And good about the fact that I took a moment to think about what the best CHOICE for me would be – from a physical and emotional perspective. So thank you for putting it all out there and helping me realize that at almost 53 not all is lost. xo

  38. #49
    Gina

    Wait! This post is not about Apothic Red?! I feel mislead! LOL (I also like Apothic Red and loved Apothic Crush that was a limited edition at Valentine’s Day…and I love Cryptic – another red wine blend).

    Alas, I am on day 26 of the Whole30, and I have not drank a sip of anything alcoholic since the start. Actually, it has been fine (but I feel the need to explain why I’m not drinking at events — really, how stupid is that??).

    I love reading your blog, because I can relate. Although, I’m not an Icee person nor do Oreos lure me to the dark side! I was so fearful starting the Whole30 – ditch all sugar, dairy (I love my cheese), processed foods, whole grains even…and it’s been fine. I feel very accomplished in myself. Now that I’m almost at the magical 30th day – I’m scared again! How do I reintroduce sugar without letting it control me?! So just know that I’ll be one of the many struggling beside you to do our best.

    I got my first Fitbit because of you, Running Like a Mother book too…although I don’t run anymore either. Bad knees.

    1. #49.1
      Cathy Zielske

      Ha! Just think of it as sugar in a bottle. Sigh.

      You know, you may decide NOT to reintroduce it. I mean, I say this, speaking as a NON moderator.

      Right now I’m on Day 4 no sugar, and I see a light at the end of the tunnel.

  39. #50
    Carol

    Aww, Cathy. Love you just the way you are. But, we’d like you around for as long as possible, so “even better if” choices are the way to that goal.

    Different tactics works for different folks. Have you read “Better than Before” by Gretchen Rubin? She talks about the different types of tendencies within personalities: Upholders, Questioners, Obligers, Rebels. Determining your type of major tendency can help you discover the tactics that work well for you in changing a habit. Some of us must go cold-turkey (no sugar, no alcohol…whatever new habit we’re trying to create). Others can go little by little into the new habit. I highly recommend the book and sorry if someone else has already suggested it.

    Sending you a cyber hug.

    Carol

  40. #51
    Kim

    Hi Cathy and all!

    I am bookmarking this post and all the comments.
    I just downed FOUR Reece’s easter eggs. For breakfast.
    Before I got out of bed, I planned to make my favorite meal : eggs, spinach, tomatoes and abit of cheese.
    How did I go wrong so fast?
    I’m going to re-read all the comments and advice and inspiration.
    Thankyou everyone.

  41. #52
    Kayla

    i highly recommend this blog, http://myzerocarblife.jamesdhogan.com/wp/
    It describes my friend Kelly’s experience of going low carb then finally zero carb. I have been zero carb for four years now and have never felt better. It’s not a diet, it’s a new way of eating. It’s so simple, healthy, and to those who don’t understand extreme.

  42. #53
    Kirsten J

    Get outta my head. Dang. I bought a bag of Easter candy at 75% off today, wtf?!? I’ve been using crazy busy work hours and PTA president as excuses to not walk. And eat candy. And drink too much. I’m going to try again…..

  43. #54
    Kelly R

    Cathy, I’ve been a follower for years. I’ve also been on the eat better/move more mode for 4 years (lost 75 lbs) but I’m writing this time to give you a dose of reality. The main reason you should put your health and wellness #1 on your list is to prolong your life. My husband died suddenly 2 1/2 years ago at the age of 47. He didn’t go for check ups, didn’t eat right, worked too much, had headaches he told no one about. He will never see his son graduate HS or college, get married, or live out his old age with me. There are 4 million widows in the US under the age of 65. If I’ve learned anything from his passing is that life is short, we don’t know what will happen but we need to do everything within our power to live our healthiest and best life.

    1. #54.1
      Cathy Zielske

      Oh Kelly, first off, I’m so sorry for your loss. I truly cannot imagine.

      And yes, this is a dose of needed reality. I cannot take my health for granted and that IS the most important part of this process. I’m in a new mindset today from when I wrote this post, realizing yet again this is on me to be healthier. Period.

      Thank you.

  44. #56
    Abby P

    The best reward after a good workout is how good one feels about doing something good for one’s body. The reward after sucking down a couple glasses of wine (yes, I’m guilty too) is losing your sense of when to stop eating crap, knowing that the calories therefrom will pack-on in the worst places, and just plain guilt. Yuck. Totally tolerable when done once a week on a Saturday night, however. Moderation and everyone wins, I’ve learned.

  45. #57
    Kelsey

    Hey. WHOA. Don’t be hating on CrossFit now 😉

    But for realz. Keep at it. I know you hate the phrase, but you’re keeping it real…with you and with the entirety of the Interwebz, and that’s a really powerful thing right thrrr.

    1. #57.1
      Cathy Zielske

      GURL, you know I’m not. You are like the bad ass mother of the Cross Fit! But what about the Boot Camp? Might be trying that. 😉

  46. #58
    Dianne

    Came across this post a few days after you wrote it. (Have to admit to not being a daily blog reader- more of a once a week binger). And wow, did it ever resonate with me. I am doing the same things, and having the same struggles. Middle age has left a spare tire around my middle and empty nesting has left me unmotivated to prepare healthy, real food. It is so much easier to snack on a cup of sugary Chai tea and a cookie or two. But wait, what happened to the whole package. That’s right I mindlessly ate it.

    Going to bookmark this to remind me that I am not alone in this struggle and to be kind to myself as I tackle this new challenge. One Day At A Time!

  47. #59
    Jules M

    Cathy: I’m catching up on my blog reading now so sorry I’m so late. Hang in there. Be kind to yourself. Think of the healthy foods as what great nutrients they are giving to you. This is a great time to head out to the farmers market. Ours start in a few weeks & I can’t wait. These guys are amazing with telling you about what they have & how you can prepare it. Talk to them. We’ve tried a bunch of new things. Get a pretty glass & enjoy some water. Put lemon or whatever you like in it so that you want to drink it. I’m not a huge water drinker but I’ve gotten so much better in the last few months. You know what my biggest problem was? When I worked from home I ate even when I wasn’t hungry. I would snack & not realize that I really didn’t need it. I would put audio books on my phone & listen to them while I took a walk. I felt like I was accomplishing things. Do what will make you feel good. I’m not always kind about myself. I know how that goes. Be gentle on yourself. Take little steps each day & you will get there. Just by eating on a better schedule & drinking more water has gotten me down about 6 pounds in 3 months. Not a huge amount but I know that it is making a difference. Little steps can do that. I hope that the negative Nellie’s can stay away & you have more positive Polly’s on your side. Listen to the positive talk. You will get there.

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