I had a moment yesterday.
All the work that went into the new CZ Classes and then into the new eCourse 30 Days of Thankful (see how I casually worked those into this post?) had culminated into the class launch and I sat back at my desk and was all, “Holy CRAP. Now what?”
As an introvert, I’ve talked about this whole self-promotion thing. It feels weird sometimes. It does. But it’s part of running a business. But yesterday, after I had that holy crap, now what moment, then I had a holy crap I am tired of ME moment as well.
All the marketing. All the promotion. All the ME, ME, ME. You know, that whole thing.
I snap chatted my best friend (because I’m modern like that) and said, “I’m crashing. I feel hollow and empty.” She told me to go do something not work related. Something just for me.
So I went to Target.
The whole way there I was rehearsing what I would say when they asked me for the third time, “You really don’t want to save five percent?”
I ended up buying two decorative pumpkins, some new boxer briefs for Cole and a smattering of Mrs. Meyer’s Clean Day Hand Soap (I’m partial to the Basil scent).
The cashier only asked me once about the Red Card, and for that, I seriously wanted to spoon her.
Came home, looked at the clock and decided that 4:05 p.m. in Minnesota was actually 5:05 p.m. in New York and poured myself a glass of Apothic Red.
Then it really hit me: what if that’s it? What if that is the last good idea you have for a class. Ever?
I recently watched an episode of Marie TV featuring Elizabeth Gilbert talking about Fear, Authenticity and Big Magic. I don’t know how I feel about Elizabeth Gilbert. I think she has some good ideas. I tried to read Eat, Pray, Love but just couldn’t get through it, though I enjoyed the movie. One thing stood out to me in the first part of the clip when she says everyone who creates always deals with fear as part of the creative process. Fear of being unoriginal. Fear of not having any good ideas. Fear of stuff just not working. She said she is not a fearless person, that fear is always her companion. She said it’s always along for the ride but she won’t allow it to drive her process.
I do wish more people would talk about the fear because sometimes I wonder, “Am I the only one who wonders what the hell is coming next?”
I’m guessing that I’m not. In fact, I’m pretty confident I’m not.
p.s. the bowl of chips in the photo? We’ll talk about that next week.
Thanks for the great kick off yesterday for my class! Just a reminder that it will remain on sale through next Tuesday at 20%off. Learn more here. I’m also extending the 10% off sale for Ten Tips for Better Type! It seems a lot of you are interested in this class and I’m happy to extend the reduced price through next Tuesday as as well!